Lurker Question - Resources about bonding?? (ticker warning)

lincoln79

***Ticker warning, losses mentioned***

Hi Ladies,

I hope you don't mind if I ask a question on this board. If it is not appropriate, I am completely willing to remove it.

MH and I are expecting a child through a gestational surrogate in November. Using a gestational surrogate is interesting in that while the child will be biologically ours, I am not carrying and both mh and I are concerned about bonding we are missing out on now and how best to facilitate bonding once our child is born.

We anticipate being at the birth (our GC lives an hour from us, but delivers quickly!).

Can you please recommend resources (books, websites, YouTube videos, whatever) that have helped facilitate bonding?

I wish each of you the best on a tough journey!

bumpuser794640

Our agency recommends no one but the parents feed, change, bathe, or soothe the baby for the first 6-8 weeks. We did this and feel very bonded to our child, and he was already almost 7 months when he came home.

Dr.Loretta

Ditto Gnome.

And tickers aren't generally a problem here

alishakay

We are adopting shortly, and I haven't even thought about not being able to bond with him. I just can't wait to get my hands on him! I know some people struggle with it though. I have no advice on reading material though. Congrats!!

lorifromwi

We make sure to get lots of snuggle time with our foster daughter who came home from the NICU with us at three weeks old.  Unfortunately, I didn't get a maternity leave, so she's in daycare bonding with others during the day.  We just make sure that we snuggle as much as we can with her at home and talk a lot with her so she's familiar with our voices.  We are four weeks in and so far so good...but we have a road ahead of us too!

Dr.Loretta

You may also want to wear him as much as possible. Moby Wraps are good for the NB stage

lincoln79

Thanks so much for sharing your experiences and advice ladies!