December 2012 Moms

Would you say something or hold your tongue?

So, I have a cousin who has a baby girl who is four months old today. For the past month, at least, she has been posting pictures and things on Facebook about all of the new foods her baby girl is eating. Granted, it is always fruits and veggies, but still. WTF? She is waaaayyyyy too young to be eating solids, and especially ones like that. I know some people have to start a little rice cereal earlier due to reflux or whatever, but that isn't the case here. Every time she makes one of these posts I just cringe. My cousin has always been extremely overweight, to the point that she had gastric bypass several years ago. I know the timing of starting solids has more to do with the readiness of the baby's digestive system than anything, but it can't help but be worried about what it will also mean for this little girl's weight as she grows up, given her mother's history. Maybe I am totally off base, I don't know. Anyway, I am not super close with this cousin and she doesn't live anywhere nearby. I am not usually one to butt into other people's parenting choices outside of message boards where people are actually asking for input. But, this just really bothers me. Would you say something to her? Maybe more than anything I just needed to vent about her to other people who I know will understand. Ugh.

Re: Would you say something or hold your tongue?

  • JessAnnJJessAnnJ member
    edited August 2014
    I probably wouldn't say anything. I doubt it will change anything and since she's a cousin you are not close to it would be weird coming from you. If my brother or sister were doing something like that I would say something, but not to more extended relatives.

    ETA - if it were something I thought was really dangerous I might say something to a cousin.

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  • Yes, you're right. After I typed this, I thought about it being weird coming from me too. I don't know why it bothers me so much, but it really does. Maybe I spent too much time on the boards where this was such a big topic at that point in our babies' lives, I don't know.
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  • If it makes you feel any better (yeah, right) I was shocked by the notes in my baby book on what my mom fed me, at our doctor's direction. She gave me the book so I could compare Sam's milestones, teething, etc. But she had saved all the notes from my 2, 4, 6, etc. month check ups where the doctor had me on rice cereal at 2 months, fruits and veggies soon after, pureed meat by 6 months. And don't get me started on the evaporated milk they gave me. Yikes. 
    But I like to think I'm relatively normal in spite of it all. :)
    Married November 2009 ~ Sam is here! (12/26/12)

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  • I have a kind of similar situation with someone I knew from high school. She nannies for a family and is very involved with the kids in her family. Some of the stuff she post makes me shake my head - stuff that's not exactly unsafe, but generally not recommended. A few times, I've had a message typed up, and I can't ever bring myself to hit send.

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  • Ok, well I am glad I am not off base with my frustration at least. Do people not read about this stuff? Or listen to their pediatrician? To each his own, I guess. I get to raise my kid my way and so does everyone else.
  • jac409 said:

    Ok, well I am glad I am not off base with my frustration at least. Do people not read about this stuff? Or listen to their pediatrician? To each his own, I guess. I get to raise my kid my way and so does everyone else.

    I wonder about this too. Do people just not read???? I research things to death and sometimes I think people assume they can just pop a kid out and treat them like an adult. And not just with feeding. I see it a lot with psychological things too.

    The Oreos being fed to a 5 month old
    Just made me cringe too. God.
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  • Maybe this is wrong, but I'd totally be criticizing her in my head. Solids before 4 months?! That poor baby's insides just aren't ready yet. That being said, I wouldn't say anything. I agree with a PP - if it was something really dangerous, like a forward facing 4 month old in a car, or a 4 month old playing with magnetic marbles, I might say something, but for something that seems ill advised I'd keep my thoughts to myself. 
  • Ugh! The same cousin just posted pictures of them at the pool this weekend, and the four month old has what looks like apple juice in her bottle. Whatever it is, it certainly isn't milk or formula. Unbelievable. WTF is she thinking?
  • I hate this as well. I made the mistake of saying something to a friend on fb. I tried to play dumb and say oh I didn't know your daughter was so old. And I got a mouth full of nonsense about how drs don't know anything. So next time I will bite my tongue
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