Birth is Thursday (updated she is here)

WannaBmomma

Haven't posted in a while. For those who do not know my story. My husband and I are adopting his step sister's baby to be born Thursday. We have all of the paperwork filed and are awaiting our homestudy to be scheduled (they wait until child is here in our type of situation in KY).

Sunday she can sign her parental rights termination forms. It's a dream come true. Will you all keep us in your thoughts and prayers that my sister in law has an easy delivery via c section with no complications, that the baby will be healthy and do well and last that everything will go smooth with the adoption process?

I am a nervous wreck and full of emotions this week.

Dr.Loretta

Sending good thoughts for you all

lorifromwi

((hugs)) What an exciting time for your family.  Wishing you a smooth transition!

Lacyj67

Good luck! Thurs is a big day for you and your family! I pray that all will go very well!

nots0patientlywaiting

Fingers crossed!

WannaBmomma

Thanks I so feel like I am going crazy lol I can't wait until the papers are signed Sunday. I may be able to breathe after that

alishakay

How exciting!

JWinCT

How exciting! Best wishes all around!

WannaBmomma

So today is the big day! My sister in law is giving birth to my daughter. I am so excited I barely could sleep. We have to be at the hospital at 530 and around 7:30 we will go back. I get to go in with her and I get to be the one to carry the baby to the nursery. After they clean the baby up and they finish with my sister inlaw then will move us to a recovery room where my husband will join us and all three of us will kangaroo pouch the baby to transition her from womb to the world. I will post a picture later with her measurements and update all on her surgery.

lorifromwi

Thinking of you today!

alishakay

What a great day! We are anxiously awaiting her arrival and your news!!

JWinCT

How exciting!! Best wishes all around!!

WannaBmomma

Our day started at 5:30 with prep for the c section and lots of nerves. At 7:26am, 7 pound 3 ounce and 18 inch Baby K came into the world. She was born blue with a heartbeat of 36 and not breathing. Sister in law and I just held hands and were trying to encourage each other she was going to be on. Her cord was wrapped around her neck and she swallowed a lot of fluid. After the longest 15 minutes of my life, watching nurses and doctors work on my child saying she wasn't ok and needed more people, I heard the sweetest cry ever.

I carried the baby to the nursery and had to step out while they Stabilized her. I was able to go back in a couple of minutes and sit with her and my husband for the first two hours of her life to hold her oxygen mask on her and I was able to give her her first water feeding and burping.


She got all of the fluid our of her lungs and the mask came off. She spent the day in sis's room with all of her family. Sis told everyone that they needed to hand baby K to her mommy for a while (me) and that was the best thing ever!

By 6 in the evening all that was left was the birth parents and us and we spent the evening just enjoying our two families and the blessing that they have given us.

Hospital has been someone overwhelming so far. The staff has been wonderful and they completely respect what is going on with our adoption. It's is the most challenging part though. Only 1 and 1/2 days left and then we get to bring her home and on Monday at 4 pm rights will be terminated and the biggest hurdle will be jumped (I think).


My sister in law sent a text last night that I will never forget. She watched us hold baby K and said she new we would be the perfect parents for her and that she loved us so much.

I am grateful to have shared this experience and emotional ride with her. We do get strength from one another.

Dr.Loretta

Congrats! Sending you all good thoughts as you get through the next few days

Chele

Congratulations on being a mom!

lorifromwi

Congratulations!  I'm crying tears of joy for you right now (and hoping my boss doesn't walk in my office!)  What a beautiful story after a bit of a rough start.

WannaBmomma

Day two has consisted mostly of just the birth parents and us. My in laws stopped by to check in and so has one friend. Today has been about bonding and I have loved every moment. Hopefully tomorrow at lunch she will go home

WannaBmomma

Hopefully today will go smooth and we will be going home. Please pray and uplift my sister in law. I know it will be hard on her. Also keep is in your thoughts as they will sign the termination papers Monday

maryoosa

You're in our thoughts. Hang in there...the days before placement and TPR were the hardest days of my life.

CarolinaGirl2014

Congrats and how exciting! Will be praying for the difficult roller coaster of emotions for you and fear leading up to TPR. I'll also be praying for K's birthmom. You may want to tell her- the days leading up to TPR and TPR itself was the most painful thing I've experienced in my life. My resolution never faltered and there was never a chance she wouldn't go home with her Mom and Dad, but it will get better for her after tomorrow. Always, always better, even in the worst moments. That will help her a ton.

sumati

Thinking of you! Congrats!

WannaBmomma

Well she signed the papers Monday. I know it was hard on her and we have the upmost respect for her for doing it. Bd signs papers Monday. BM's mom really seems to be having a hard time with it. She told me that she will always call bm her mom and could never get used to it. That is so very hurtful. We want biomom to involved. I hope by giving them time to deal with it it will get better. We debated not going over there for a few days because she needs to bond with us. What do you think?

bumpuser794640

I think you need to do what works for you and baby. I agree that you need to work on bonding, and giving the bio family some space sounds like a good idea, too. Maybe set up a time to visit in a week or two, so they know you aren't cutting them off forever.

lorifromwi

I think sometimes it can be harder for the relatives than those directly involved because they didn't get to make the choice and still have to live with the consequences.  She may be upset because she wants to be grandma and is just expressing it with hurtful/ insensitive things because she isn't coping well with her grief.  Would you be open to having her be a grandma role as well in your little ones life?  As my aunt likes to say, you can never have too many people that love you!  That could potentially ease some fears for her.

I know even without knowing me for 32 years, my birthmom's family still calls her my mom and can sometimes be confused when I say mom and am referring to my adoptive mom.  Sometimes it's hard for me to understand..."How hard is it to understand that the woman who raised me is mom, and my birthmom is my best confidant?"  But, I don't push it on them.

Good luck and hopefully a little time and healing helps the BM's mom get to a better, more reasonable place.  ((hugs))

WannaBmomma

Oh my sister in law is my husbands sister grandma is still grandma either way. I left that out. In the beginning she was the one who suggested us. Thanks for the the prayers

CarolinaGirl2014

Not to be mean, but I couldn't disagree more with Gnome. I think you do have to do what feels right in your gut, but don't feel that you can't have a balance of involvement and separation. I think it might be cruel to block her from you and baby for two weeks, especially with her being baby's aunt: an aunt that lived close would be seeing baby within that time frame. I saw A 5 days after her birth, and 5 days after that, and it didn't stop her bonding with her mom in any way. I think it would be cruel to baby as well. All she's known to this point is birthmom's sound and smell, so letting her have the reassurance that she isn't abandoned every so often is a very good thing for her. I personally think that our society gives too little credit to the separation grief that even babies experience, and for me adoption is about the well-being of the baby before birth families and adoptive families. Don't forget that you can make visits short as well if that's what's best for your family. 

Congrats, again!

JWinCT

What a scary experience, but I'm glad it had a happy ending! Congratulations!

WannaBmomma

Thanks It seems to be working out some. I have been in the hospital since Tuesday. I caught staph from BM's hospital and had to have surgery. Yesterday was hard because I didn't get to see my daughter. She was tired of traveling so I told dad to stay home and both rest. He went to in laws and they helped care for her while he took a nap. I cried my eyes out. Today she spent the day with me and my honey at hospital. This was the first day bm didn't see her. I figured if I had to do it and it didn't kill me she would be ok. DH and I decided after talking to my parents that grandparent don't have to see the baby every day that every 2-3 days is good enough that way we get the majority of the bonding time and everyone is still involved

Wish Upon A Star

Congratulations! Happy to hear that the baby is healthy!

annalisel

First congrats! Wishing everyone a smooth transition.

But whoa. Get well soon from the staph infection and surgery. That must have been scary.

Chele

Sending positive thoughts your SIL's way. 

WannaBmomma

I was released from hospital on wednesday afternoon with instructions to take it easy.

My kidney function went down to 15% but dr thinks I can at least recover to 60% with time.
We all have been resting and getting our routines establish.

If things go well, I might be able to go back to work next week.