For anyone who wants to tell their story.

KeiraS713

Everyone in here has had some type of loss and i know that some feel better talking about it. Myself personally, i couldnt talk about my m/c until a week later without crying. 

My story... 

I tested 9dpo and got a pretty bright BFP and was excited..I told everyone in my family not thinking a m/c could ever happen to me. Well, a week later i woke up bleeding pretty heavily. I called my OB/GYN and they advised me to go to the E.R...Went to the er and had my blood drawn, a pelvic exam and an US...I was told after all of that that i was having a m/c. I cried for a week straight and didn't want to talk about it to anyone. The crazy thing is i tested so early (which i shouldn't have) and ended up m/c'ing 2 days after my missed period (i think it was 2 days)..if i didnt test early and tested days after my missed period like i should have, i would have just thought it was my period coming. So now this time around i will 100% wait until AFTER my missed period to test..Finding out early really isn't worth it to me this time.

So, to anyone who doesn't mind talking about their loss, i just want to get to know everyone and their story. Thanks!

buggirl72

My baby was healthy. So were a lot of other ladies who went into preterm labor and had live births.

Early losses also happen with healthy embryos for a variety of reasons.

Glad your doctors words gave you comfort. Frankly, they pissed me off.

I think it's time you stepped away from the new discussion button, read lots of posts, and give support to others.

rslh10

If you read some posts, you will see that a lot of us have signatures that give you a pretty good run down about our stories. I suggest that you read some of the threads, and reply to some of the posts. Support the ladies and get to know how this board works. There are certain places on the board to post certain things so that we don't have, for example, 3 threads started by a new member within 30-45 minutes of their intro (or whatever). Get to know us all that way  

eta-stuff *-:)

BethKate2

Miscarriages happen for lots of reasons, and many times, with healthy babies. If your doctor made you feel better, great, but comments like that are likely to upset a lot of people on this board.

I agree with @buggirl72. In the last two days, you've started 7 threads on here and TTGP, and the majority of your comments seem to be only on those threads.

If you want to know about our stories, read the other threads and offer support to people who need it. You'll get to know us a lot better that way, and it'll help us to get to know you as well.

ETA: words

Poppy715

Addie was healthy. The doctors said she was perfect. My body failed me, royally. She couldn't survive because of my body. She died because of me.

I am sorry for your loss but you have no idea how hurtful your doctors comments were. Repeating them to all of us is no different.

BethKate2

Poppy715 said:

Addie was healthy. The doctors said she was perfect. My body failed me, royally. She couldn't survive because of my body. She died because of me. I am sorry for your loss but you have no idea how hurtful your doctors comments were. Repeating them to all of us is no different.

((hugs)) @Poppy715

mrsjg2013

mrandmrsk91011 said:

If my doctor had told me what your doctor told you, I would be switching doctors.

This.  I've had several friends tell me something similar- having the "it was a blessing in disguise" attitude is one of the most hurtful things I've encountered during the TTCAL journey.  I'm surprised that you find comfort in this, honestly.  

I am very sorry for your loss- it is a heartbreaking experience.  I hope you are able to give comfort and support here as well as seek it.  

rslh10

mrandmrsk91011 said:

If my doctor had told me what your doctor told you, I would be switching doctors.

This. Exactly. Fuck that Dr. That's the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. How dare him. It's a child, and you would have loved it...sick or not. Wow.

Km380

I can't even. I've lost 2 babies. Seen a heartbeat. Past edd's with no baby. With zero reason for my losses. No reason for my pain. I get enough of people saying these hurtful things to me irl. I come here to not hear them.

Do some lurking, go back and read our intros, look at people's siggys. Give support to get support

rslh10

Hugs to all of you ladies! I am so sorry this is bringing up the hurt for you!!!  >:D< 

MrsKush1014

So many {{{HUGS}}} @poppy715

MrsKush1014

I agree with PPs.  We've all already told our stories and it sucks to retell them.  Our signatures tell enough of our stories without rehashing all of the painful details.

Km380

@Poppy715‌ (((hugs))) I have tears in my eyes for you

LilNugget19

SMH! I can't even fathom what kind of doctor would say such a thing. I find their reasoning extremely heartbreaking. I'm not sure what you were hoping to get from this thread but asking us to rehash such painful experiences is in no way a support to this community. Read our signatures, join the newbie check- in and get to know us that way. Give support to get support.

LilNugget19

@Poppy715‌ so many ((hugs)).

buggirl72

((((Hugs)))) @Poppy715‌ and @PetraStonegirl‌ and everyone else hurt by this.

OP, we don't blow smoke up each other's asses and give out platitudes or "words of comfort."

I will not have my rainbow. My son died an hour after he was born because he was too small for NICU. Genetically and physically perfect but too small to be saved.

The women on this board who know me probably have an idea of just how incredibly angry your post made me based on my coming back and commenting again.

I'm stepping away now before I say something that could get me in trouble with the Bump gods.

Lalalady54

@Poppy715‌ big hugs to you.

rslh10

@buggirl72 I am so sorry you're being hurt by this! What is with all the hurtful nonsense lately!! Big hugs, lady  

Poppy715

LilNugget19 said:

SMH! I can't even fathom what kind of doctor would say such a thing. I find their reasoning extremely heartbreaking. I'm not sure what you were hoping to get from this thread but asking us to rehash such painful experiences is in no way a support to this community. Read our signatures, join the newbie check- in and get to know us that way. Give support to get support.

I actually really do find healing in discussing my daughter, what happened when she was born and my loss. I've written it out and have had such wonderful discussions with people when I have shared mine and Addie's story.

What irks me about this post is the thought that a loss is a good thing and that it will lead to a sucessful pg. We all know this isn't the truth. It doesn't always happen like that. I can't ever think a loss is a means to an end. It's heartbreaking and awful. For me personally to hear that losing Addison was a ok because it will lead to a healthy pg is insane. I have no guarantee. I have no way of knowing if I will lose another baby. I have no way of knowing if I will live through another pg. Your doctors/your words are hurtful and inconsiderate.

Poppy715

buggirl72 said:

((((Hugs)))) @Poppy715‌ and @PetraStonegirl‌ and everyone else hurt by this. OP, we don't blow smoke up each other's asses and give out platitudes or "words of comfort." I will not have my rainbow. My son died an hour after he was born because he was too small for NICU. Genetically and physically perfect but too small to be saved. The women on this board who know me probably have an idea of just how incredibly angry your post made me based on my coming back and commenting again. I'm stepping away now before I say something that could get me in trouble with the Bump gods.

I miss you dearly bug and think of you and your sweet Z often. (((HUGS))) bug.

tigerlynx31413

Poppy715buggirl72PetraStonegirl! I'm so sorry for this hurtful re-hashing. No one should have to relive the most painful moments unless they want to!

jjbmstinco

I am so sorry ladies.  It has been a rough week here!

OP, I would love that baby "sick" or not. Please do not belittle what we went through by thinking that you are helping us.  What we have been through is something that no one should have to go through.  But life is not fair, and we have.  We come here to GET and GIVE support.  Please try to do that before posting hurtful things.

PinkCamino

I've been in a really good place lately and this just opened up a huge can of worms.

I never really look at my story in its entirety. honestly, I've never actually written it out from start to finish because deep down I know what that will do to me. Ignorance is bliss right?

sfazar

Hugs to you all!  And OP, I'm very sorry for your loss.  I know that I had a million questions after mine, but I realized more and more as I read other ladies' stories on the boards and saw more newbies intros that I am not alone.  I have found support by drinking it all in and also by getting my feet wet by joining the TTCAL thread for my birth month (August). You should consider getting to know the ladies in yours!

This type of post is so hard to deal with--I am a newbie, so I don't know the answer to this question: is there a way for our kind moderators to add in the title that many have found it hurtful?  I feel sorry that this post has caused pain when I don't think it was the intention at all of the OP to hurt but rather to find common ground.

 

jjbmstinco

I  have been thinking about your @PinkCamino

PinkCamino

ashtog said:

my baby was 39 weeks and perfect. nothing wrong with him and I didn't get to take him home because of a cord accident.. how was that a blessing in disguise?? your dr is an asshole.
now I need a drink.
 and to @buggirl72, @poppy715, @petrastonegirl, @holdingouthope, @sarcaztic10, @wickedsugar, @pinkcamino and anyone else this insensitive post hurt {{{{big hugs}}}}}

so so so many hugs.

xoxox. Our babies were perfect and we didn't get to keep them. It's just fucking unfair.

rslh10

ashtog said:

my baby was 39 weeks and perfect. nothing wrong with him and I didn't get to take him home because of a cord accident.. how was that a blessing in disguise?? your dr is an asshole.
now I need a drink.
 and to @buggirl72, @poppy715, @petrastonegirl, @holdingouthope, @sarcaztic10, @wickedsugar, @pinkcamino and anyone else this insensitive post hurt {{{{big hugs}}}}}

So many hugs to you, lady.
Also, to every one else that has been hurt buy this shit. Even more hugs. I'll just keep my arms open and you guys just come get em as you need em. FFS. this month can GTFO.

beckynsean11

I can't even with this today. Hugs to everyone in this thread. If my doctor had said that to me, my husband would have been arrested. There was nothing at all wrong with either of my girls. Shitty shit happened. The.End. What your doctor said was offensive, wrong & did not need to be repeated to a group of grieving women.

KeiraS713

KeiraS713

 

Poppy715

KeiraS713 said:

I haven't read any of the responses bc i'm sure most were pretty rude & without very nice things to say..they had the right bc after getting a Message telling me what i posted was hurtful, i reread it i agree i probably hurt some feelings..So sorry, i didn't mean to hurt anyone..It was a "post before you think" moment..I cant delete it or i would...I posted the original discussion for anyone who wanted to share. Being new here, you wonder what everyone else has gone though also. Sorry again and I hope I'm not bashed for the rest of my time here.

So sorry you got your feelings hurt by what I wrote?

Sorrynotsorry?

 

Try again OP.

buggirl72

KeiraS713 said:

Seriously? You have not read the responses because you are sure they are rude?

Way to dismiss our children. Good job OP.

Be kind enough to read the responses because they will help you to get to know us and realize exactly why what you did was hurtful.

MrsGoody428

Wow. I'm so happy I came back for this!
Based on that quack of a Dr's logic... My next pregnancy will lead to the live births of a damn soccer team. That's what I get for my FOUR consecutive losses?!?!

buggirl72

We have established that my doctor is an asshole but at lease he had the common sense (decency) to say "oh my God, that is terrible, how horrible!" when I told him about Zachary and my subsequent losses.

And I really want to know that OP read our posts.

She needs to know about Addie and Zachary and Ashtog's boy and the rest of our angels.

ETA - darn us for not QFPing her first post since she edited it to remove what her doctor said and what gave her soooo much comfort. I'm sure anyone reading these posts will be able to figure out the gist of it, but still!

rslh10

Listen, OP...You asked. You ask and you shall receive. Don't cry about it... Read your responses...you asked for them.

shandorfml2

PinkCamino said:

ashtog said:

my baby was 39 weeks and perfect. nothing wrong with him and I didn't get to take him home because of a cord accident.. how was that a blessing in disguise?? your dr is an asshole.
now I need a drink.
 and to @buggirl72, @poppy715, @petrastonegirl, @holdingouthope, @sarcaztic10, @wickedsugar, @pinkcamino and anyone else this insensitive post hurt {{{{big hugs}}}}}

so so so many hugs.

xoxox. Our babies were perfect and we didn't get to keep them. It's just fucking unfair.

love to all ladies and our wonderful angels. *Edited because spelling is hard when your sad

mpiemont

The thread is really upsetting. Sending lots of hugs to everyone tonight. Like alot of PPs have said, I was in a pretty decent place until this dredged up my "story". I hadn't cried in at least a few days, which was huge for me. That's ruined now. Ugh.

rslh10

mpiemont said:

The thread is really upsetting. Sending lots of hugs to everyone tonight. Like alot of PPs have said, I was in a pretty decent place until this dredged up my "story". I hadn't cried in at least a few days, which was huge for me. That's ruined now. Ugh.

Hugging the shit outta you

stinybean

I want to offer so many (((HUGS))) to PP's. I hope next week is a better week for this board. There is way too much nonsense going on.

**If I could figure out how to post a gif on my android there would be a picture of two wine glasses hugging right here**

TVLily

The next full moon is still 10 days away wtf is going on here lately.....

Sending all of you ladies big (((hugs))) and holding you and all of our beautiful babies so close to my heart. :x

MSU_Girl1202

Sending so so many hugs to the wonderful ladies that had to re-hash their stories.