Intro and delivering — The Bump
Late Term and Child Loss

Intro and delivering

I never thought I'd be here, but I guess everyone feels that.
This morning I went for my 36 week check up and found that my little boy had no heartbeat. I'm at labor and delivery now and being induced. This was my first pregnancy. I'm at a loss for words.
How did you all find the strength?
BFP #1 12/19/13 We lost our Fenix 7/31/14 at 36 weeks due to torn umbilical cord
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My Chart TTA until Feb 2015
~*ALL AL WELCOME*~
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kathy5780

Re: Intro and delivering

  • msunshine123msunshine123 member
    500 Comments 250 Love Its Third Anniversary Photogenic
    edited July 2014
    I am so sorry for the loss of your son and to welcome you to this board. My heart breaks for you. I lost my son at 39 weeks and 3 days due to a cord accident on the day of his delivery - 8 weeks ago. (he is my 1st child) Learning his heart had stopped hurt more than anything. I pray you find strength and support from all those around you as well as the amazing women on this board. Huge ((Hugs)) Enjoy the time with your son after delivery - hold him, love him and take lots and lots of pictures.
  • VyD81VyD81 member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Photogenic First Anniversary
    *siggy warning* I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby boy. It's horrible to be in Labor and delivery and waiting to be induced, my nurse was wonderful and I hope yours will be too. Echoing what sunshine123 said, spend time with your son and take lots of pictures. Hugs.
    Ticker id: ra2f

    BFP #2, EDD 12/26/14, please be our rainbow.

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  • Mel&John2013Mel&John2013 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Photogenic
    edited July 2014

    I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious baby boy.

    To answer your question...don't feel that you have to be strong. A terrible thing has happened, and you are allowed to be a wreck.

    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • MeNVMeNV member
    Third Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I am so, so sorry you are facing this. I am so sorry for the loss of your little boy. Even being on this side of it, I'm always at a loss of words. If I could go back, I would take more pictures and video of my sweet baby. I hate that these are the questions you're asking. Thinking of you and your family during this incredibly difficult time. 
    Baby Boy - 03/29/10
    Baby Boy - 08/02/12
    Baby Girl - 04/19/14 Missing her everyday.



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  • I am so sorry for your loss.  Take time with him.  Do you you need to do.  CRY you don't have to be strong right now.

    HUGS
    TTC 2007
    Me-OK DH- MFI
    2010 IUI 1-3 Femara + Ovidrill BFN
    Change DR 5/12 IUI 4-5 Natural Cycle BFN
    5/13 DH diagnosed with b1/b3 microdeletion of Y chromosome
    IVF #1 July  Started Lupron 7/5 AF 7/14
    ER 8/1 7R 5M 3F W/ICSI ET 8/6 Moved to 8/7 due to no blast 
    Transferred our UNO embryo Beta #1 27 Beta #2 33 Beta #3 29 CP :(
    IVF #2 Started Lupron 2/14 
    Protocol 10U Lupron, 150 Bravelle, 150 Menopur, HGH for 4 days, Dexamethesone, 
    Supplements 6000mg CoQ10, 100mg DHEA, Vitamin D, Folic Acid, 
    ER 3/12 8R 4 able to be injected 2f with ICSI ET 3/15 2 "perfect" textbook Embryos
    2 crinone, estrace, dexamethesone, doxycycline
    BETA #1 3/26 201  BETA #2 3/28 524  BETA #3 4/5 9,876  Ultrasound April 7 Showed TWINs
    April 18 ultrasound Baby A HB 147   Baby B HB 146  Both measuring 7w1d
    WE ARE TEAM BLUE X2!
    Jonathan Daniel received his angel wings July 23, 2014 :( born 9/20/14
    Jackson Thomas was born October 31, 2014 @ 35w 5d
    image



  • I am so so sorry for your loss. Take lots of pictures! Get footprints, handprints, a clip of his hair, his blankie, his clothes, anything and everything. Spend as much time with him as you want - hold him, smell him, look at every little inch of his body. Do whatever feels right - there is no wrong answer. And you will get through because there is no other option. And we will be here whenever you need us.
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    Me: 32 DH: 33  High School Sweethearts  Married 5/28/2005
    DS1 born 6/5/10 at 40 weeks via emergency c-section due to fetal distress and IUGR caused by placental insufficiency
    DS2 born still 8/28/13 at 32 weeks via emergency c-section due to a complete placental abruption - cause unknown
    Baby #3 on the way, EDD 2/29/16.  Originally twins, but we said goodbye to Baby B at 8 weeks.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss and my heart breaks for you. Have the hospital call the charity Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep to take some professional pictures for you if they are available in your area. So so so many hugs.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
                                        motheringcarolinegrace.wordpress.com

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  • sig warning***





    I am so so sorry for the loss of your son.  Like others have said, spend as much time as you feel comfortable with- hold your son, name him (if you haven't already), if you belong to a church consider calling your pastor/etc for a blessing or baptism, bathe him, dress him and know that whatever you chose to do or not do, your son never knew fear or pain, was loved his entire life and will be remembered. 

    As for finding strength, I think you will discover your strength in ways you least expect and not all at once.  Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever you feel.  Know that I am thinking of you and your son (and family) and sending you thoughts for comfort and healing in the days and weeks ahead. <3


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    Anniversary

    TTC since 2008
    Dh:34, no issues.  Me:31, Endo, slightly hypothyroid, deformed ovary, paracentric inversion.
    4 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone +TI cycles= all BFN
    Lap in 2012 to remove large unresolving cyst discovered endo and double lobed ovary.
     6 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone IUI cycles= All BFN,
    1st IVF w/ICSI- June '13 Antagonist: Gonal-F, Menopur, Ganirelix, HcG, Estradiol, Crinone= 7 retrieved, 4 mature, 1 unfertilized, 2 abnormally fertilized, 1 normally fertilized.  2DT of only embryo and our miracle BFP.
    Our beloved baby boy was born sleeping Oct. 13, 2013 due to pROM/IC/Uterine infection.
    2nd IVF w/ICSI- Feb. '14 EPP/lupron/antagonist: Estrace, lupron, HGH, Gonal-F, Menopur, HcG, PIO, lovenox, doxy/dex.=21 retrieved, 16 mature, 15 fertilized!!  5dt of 1 blast/ 6 frozen. BFP!  Beta 1 9dp5dt:83.9  Beta 2: 11dp5dt: 145.2  Beta 3  14dp5dt: 497  Please be our sticky rainbow baby!

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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. The other ladies have already given you helpful ideas of things to do. I will be thinking of you.
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  • ManadaManada member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I am also sorry to hear of your loss.

    We lost our twins 6 weeks ago today, and we have learned what a roller coaster grief can be.

    I echo and second what the PP have said above about taking your time, and getting mementos of your time with your baby. We were so afraid when we lost our girls, and didn't have any idea what to expect or what was possible - but we treasure the memories we have of the hours we held them, the photos we got, and the hand and footprints we have from them. At the time, I didn't think to bathe our babies, or ensure that we have a good family photo of the 4 of us ... And while I am glad we spent the time we did, those are two things I wish I had thought of at the time. Really though, I am learning that there will always be more to yearn for.

    The first few days were a whirlwind for us, it felt surreal, but also weren't as painful as the days that followed because our babies were so close to us in the hospital... Take your time there, spend as much time with your baby as you want.

    Good luck for a decent labour. We will be here for more support when you need it.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    queer couple - 32 (me) & 33 (my love) years old - donor sperm,

    Our IF/TTC journey since Nov 2012.

    Me: dx of DOR in Nov. 2012. Low AMH, AFC - 6, Normal FSH, SS-A (RO) Antibodies (Autoimmune issues), tubes clear, Sono (November 2013) NORMAL! <p>

    7 IUI's - December 2012-September 2013.  Medicated, Injected, Triggered.... all BFN.

    My Love:  (the amazing @Healz413)
    Normal AMH & FSH, AFC ~27, blocked tube dx'd via HSG in 2012.   Hydrosalpinx & ovarian cyst dx'd in May 2013.
    dx of Stage IV Endo & bilateral salpinectomy in June 2013.  

    image

    Partner IVF#1a- December 2013 - H's eggs, my Ute - CANCELLED due to low response
    Partner IVF #1b - February 2014 - H's eggs, my Ute - ER February 4 (10 retrieved, 3 fertilized), Transfer Feb 7 of one Grade 1 and one Grade 2 day 3 embryos.  1 - Day 3, Grade 1 frosty saved.   BFP - 6dp3dt via FRER, Beta #1 - 110, Beta #2 175, Beta #3 - 348, Beta #4 - 2222!, Beta #5 - 4255.  Ultrasound (6w1d) - 2 heartbearts!  

    We lost our beautiful Twin baby girls on June 18, 2014.  Tavin Sara and Casey Elizabeth were born at 21 weeks gestation and were absolutely beautiful, precious, amazing babies.  We miss our daughters every day and love them with all our hearts.

    image

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  • ***SIGGY WARNING***



    I'm so, so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. I lost my son almost two years ago at 34w4d due to a complete placental abruption, and it was like the biggest punch to the gut I'd ever felt. You will find a way to be strong, because it just naturally happens in situations like this. But do not be afraid to cry, scream, whatever. You do not have to be strong the entire time; it's OK to break down whenever you need to.

    I will echo what others said about pictures, holding etc. Do what you feel is right at the time, and try not to dwell or feel guilty about something you didn't think to do until afterwards. I know that you will make the most of your time with your sweet boy, and we will be here for you when you need us. If you're comfortable, please share his name with us. I'd love to know it.

    I hate that you're here but am glad you found us. Thinking of you throughout the next few days. ***hugs***






    ________________________________________________________________________________


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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I agree with PPs...you just kind of DO. It's horrible and it's unfair and completely devastating. Don't feel like you have to be strong for others. Let yourself grieve. We are here for you. I'll be thinking of you and your family.
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
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  • ** siggy warning **


    I am so so sorry to hear what's happening to you! You will discover that you're stronger than you ever imagined. Some moments you might feel numb or weak or like you're about to lose it, but overall you will get through it. Cherish whatever time you have with your son, I wish I had more memories of that time.
    And we'll always be here to understand when others can't!



    first son stillborn 7/20/13 at 39 weeks due to Acute Fatty Liver of Pregnancy
    It's a girl! Baby Anna was born August 3, 2014!

     
  • sig warning***





    I am so so sorry for the loss of your son.  Like others have said, spend as much time as you feel comfortable with- hold your son, name him (if you haven't already), if you belong to a church consider calling your pastor/etc for a blessing or baptism, bathe him, dress him and know that whatever you chose to do or not do, your son never knew fear or pain, was loved his entire life and will be remembered. 

    As for finding strength, I think you will discover your strength in ways you least expect and not all at once.  Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever you feel.  Know that I am thinking of you and your son (and family) and sending you thoughts for comfort and healing in the days and weeks ahead. <3


    **ticker warning**

    Great advice and very well said. I am so sorry for your loss.  Many of the ladies here have already listed some wonderful things to do with your son, so I won't repeat.  Hugs and prayers to you and your family.  
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  • I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. It is the hardest thing you will ever do. You will survive, not sure how we all do, but we do. I hope you have lots of love and support around you right now (((hugs))) love that baby up, and take lots of pictures.

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    BFP# 1 7/7/12 Beautiful DD born still at 36 weeks 5 days on 3/2/13
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    BFP # 2 8/7/14 EDD 4/22/15
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    inbow!!

    **All AL Welcome**

  • NoetholaNoethola member
    2500 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    edited August 2014
    ***ticker***


    I am so, so very sorry for the loss of your son. I come in too late to give any suggestions/advice, but know that we are here for you. You can use the board as often or as little as you please as you go through this grief journey. 
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


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  • I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet baby boy. You will find a strength you never knew you had. The first few days after our loss are a blur. I was able to eat (barely), sleep and and cry and that was pretty much it. It felt like I could hardly breath. Eventually you begin to create a new "normal".

    We are here for you whenever you need us. Hugs

    Asher born February 5, 2011.

    Baby #2 born sleeping at 20 weeks. May 6, 2014.

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