sleep

jgallegos0316

OK, my son is 2.5 and ever since nap training at 6 mos old, he has been an incredible sleeper. He does not cry and never has at bedtime, and he lays down for naps in his toddler bed fine. My question is....for forever he went to bed at 7, then naturally it moved to 8. About 2 months ago, around teh time we moved himt o his big boy bed, he has had a hard time settling down at night. we start the bedtime routine @645 with bath ( only everyother day) the jammies and stories usually @730, with the goal to be laying in bed at 8. Problem is he gets up about a billion which i know is normal, but he cannot seem to settle down til 915/930. Is this normal? Did anyone experience this? We do tell him after several times of re tucking him in that e will go to the corner for time out if he gets out again. He still wakes and naps at all the same times. Just wondering if it will work itself out. ..... He currently wakes @ 6, naps from 1-3 and is finally usually asleep by 9/930.

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UMichGirl

DS isn't in a toddler bed yet (and I will be keeping him in that crib for as long as possible lol!) but I do know that with it being summer and lighter out so much later, his bedtime has become later as well. He used to be asleep by 8/8:30 and up around 6/6:30. Now he's out by 9/9:30 usually and up 7/7:30. Maybe he just isn't ready to go to bed so early??

Monicagail1

Toddler bedtime is tough at best, and I find even harder in the summer when it's light longer. We have room darkening curtains in the girls' rooms which seems to help a bit. Otherwise I just keep putting them to bed with as little reaction/attention as possible.

ELF4321

DD is 26 moths and has been doing the same thing (except she's still in her crib and will be as long as I can keep her there). Falling asleep at 9-9:30 when it used to be 8:30, and she's fighting naps too, even though she definitely still needs one. I'm hoping it's just a stage and trying to stay consistent. Sorry, I know that isn't much help.

jgallegos0316

if he is suppose t stay in bed, how else do you tech him that? If he doesnt have a consequence for getting up a billion times then he will just keep on doing it bc he can get away with it. I'm a teacher and I'm prego.... when it gets to be 830/9, I'm tired. I need a little mommy time before i just go straight to bed.

jgallegos0316

Im sure you do everything perfectly too. thanks for teh support.

jgallegos0316

Thank you Monicagail1 and Elf4321 for the supportive feedback!

jgallegos0316

your advice is welcome as long as you arent making me feel like a crappy mom, which you did.

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jgallegos0316

Thx anyway

Leap08

jgallegos0316 said:

if he is suppose t stay in bed, how else do you tech him that? If he doesnt have a consequence for getting up a billion times then he will just keep on doing it bc he can get away with it. I'm a teacher and I'm prego.... when it gets to be 830/9, I'm tired. I need a little mommy time before i just go straight to bed.

Have you tried positive reinforcement for staying in bed? Both of my girls had issues with getting out of bed this summer (they're 4.5 and 2.5). I think a lot of it has to do with how light it is in the rooms at bedtime. We pushed back lights out to more like 8:30, and we started doing reward/sticker charts for staying in bed. I knew that would work with my 4.5 year old as she responds really well to that type of motivation. I wasn't sure about my 2.5 year old, but it has worked like a charm. I just remind her at bedtime to stay in bed so she can get a sticker. And in the morning she'll say "I get a sticker!" When we started she had to get 5 stickers (not in a row) and then she got a small "prize" (toy, book, coloring book for about $5). Then she had to get 10 stickers. Then she had to get 7 stickers in a row. She is doing so well now, she needs 14  (2 weeks) of stickers in a row for a prize. I am surprised at how well it has worked and how peaceful our evenings have been.  

aglenn

Have you tried one of the toddler clocks?  We have them for DD and DS and they look like stop lights; we will tell them "when the light is red you stay in bed" and it turns green at wake up time.  These help a lot.  Sometimes we still have to put DS back in his bed eleven million times before he goes to sleep, but I think that is just part of the age and testing boundaries. 

jgallegos0316

Thank You Ladies For The Encouraging Advice!!!

Ksych

With my 2.5 year old, we go over rules before bed time. The rules are that he stays in his bed, we do some deep breaths and we close our eyes. If he gets out if his bed I walk him back to his room and put him back in bed with as little of a reaction as possible. Sometimes it takes awhile but eventually he goes to sleep. Sleep problems are rough!

MellyK12

We are going through the same thing so I sympathize with you.  DD used to go right to bed and one night she just stopped and wants both of us in the room with her.  Her pediatrician said it's separation anxiety.  We tried CIO but it didn't work, she became hysterical and couldn't breathe.  She has allergies and ashma so we really can't let her cry for long without having an asthma attack. Not to mention it breaks my heart.  Then we tried putting her back in bed and leaving, over and over again, same thing happened with the hysterical crying.  Now we are just moving closer and closer out the door.  We do the same night time routine, limit it to 2-3 books, she gets a stuffed animal, lights out and we say goodnight.  We don't lay on her bed or on the floor but sit with our heads down, no talking and no eye contact.  We are just outside the door right now so making progress. 

ttimmerman

I agree with pps that getting out of bed doesn't warrant a time out...that's not going to solve anything. If he's not tired, that's no reason to punish him just because YOU are tired.

If you want him to go to bed earlier, try cutting back on his nap. Most 2-3 year olds still nap, but some don't - my daughter started cutting her nap right around 2 1/2 and was done with it by 3. Bed time had become a battle every night b/c she just wasn't tired enough to fall asleep if she took a typical nap. I would wake your LO up after an hour and half and see if it helps at bed time, or even cut it down to an hour. If that doesn't help or you don't want to cut his nap, then just let him go to bed later for the time being. You can't force a kid to sleep if he's genuinely not tired. 

SunAndRain

I'm a strong proponent of time outs (my DD is the queen of them) but I don't think this is an appropriate time to use them. Why? Because your goal is to get your toddler to stay IN bed and go to sleep, and time outs are keeping him awake and OUT of bed.

You might try the Super Nanny strategy where you just keep walking him back to bed, without talking, after all the books and kisses and good nights. No more talking. No more interaction. Just walk him back to bed.  If he kicks and screams for attention, just walk (or carry) him gently back to bed. No talking. Repeat 1000 times, like we did, and see how it goes.

What we had to resort to was putting up a baby gate across DD's door.  She would pass out (fall asleep, not literally pass out, for those online who are strongly opposed to CIO) on the floor by the gate and we would carry her back to bed before we went to bed ourselves. But at least she understood that "night night" meant no more time with mom and dad.  She could hear us so she knew she wasn't alone. She has night lights so she can always see.  She just cannot come out of her room.  She wants to read in her room? Fine!  She just cannot come out to play, wine, argue, question...period.

Currently when DH puts her to bed she goes down without a fight.  When I put her to bed she still fights it.  So, see?  It's all about control.

mommy423g

Hi, I'm a new lurker on this board over from M15 birth month board.  I just posted about this on the preschool board.  We are currently have issues with DD (almost 3.5yrs old) & bedtime.  Thanks so much for all these helpful ideas.  I will be trying each of them until something works.  First thing I will try is the sticker calendar.  I actually used that to potty train DD, no idea why I didn't think of trying it for bedtime.  It must be my lack of sleep, lol.  Thanks ladies!!!!

Ya Never Know

We follow the same routine and lately DD has been doing the same thing. We've just been leaving her alone. She can't leave her room, and we just hear her in there singing, or sometimes she's over near her window, but she eventually stops and goes to bed. It's been moreso this way since summer started and the days have been longer. I figure she catches up at nap time most days, or catches up the next night.