Beyond rude! — The Bump
Baby Showers

Beyond rude!

My Mom went to a baby shower for a friend's daughter in law on the weekend. While opening gifts the MTB said several times "not the one I registered for...but thanks".  My mom sat beside a woman who is an avid quilter and gave a beautiful baby quilt.  One of the hostesses came to her after it was opened and said that the quilt didn't fit with the nursery theme, and did she have a receipt.  She told her no, that she made it by hand, there was no receipt.  Hostess looked disappointed and says "Oh...I guess she'll have to keep it then" and walked away. The lady was extremely hurt, but said nothing.  If it had been me I would have taken the quilt and left...  :P

 

jennypolkadotsyoitsloooombradellarosa
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Re: Beyond rude!

  • That is disgusting!  My DH's aunt made us a beautiful quilt for the baby, I could never say something like that to someone who spent time & effort for me.  Terrible! 
  • OMFG.

    As soon as I saw that shizz happening I would have grabbed my gift and left.  How ungrateful can you be??  And as a quilter, knowing how many hours it takes to make something by hand, I would have taken my quilt back and donated it to a shelter.

    Some people really suck.

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  • That almost makes me want to cry!  How horrible!  
    [Deleted User]idontevenknow
  • I'm a quilter too and would have been so upset if someone was so rude.  Didn't she learn you're supposed to say thank you even if you hate the gift!
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  • My Mom thinks the hostess went to everyone with an "unsuitable" gift to ask for receipts, but this one really stuck in her craw as it was clearly a beautiful gift, handmade with care.  She said she really wanted to grab her gift and go, but felt bad for her friend who was embarrassed by the host and her DIL.  Many people left right after the gifts were opened, so I think many were probably offended. 

     

  • VORVOR
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments Photogenic
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    Wow. Just wow. I'd hope I'd have the presence of mind to say "O.k, I'll take it back then.".
  • Wow.  That is so rude.  I am not a quilter but I crochet and knit so I understand how it takes a long time to complete these projects.  I would have taken it back too.
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  • My MIL made DD a beautiful flannel quilt that only slightly matches her nursery (DD's room is pink and there is some pink in it, but that's where the coordination ends). It became my favorite blanket while breast feeding, it's the one that we cover up with while I'm rocking her to sleep every night, and I hope that she'll grow up to treasure it as being from grandma. Who cares that it doesn't match exactly (or at all)?

    I'd be pretty pissed and probably would have said something. Plus, oh man, how embarrassing for your mom's friend? I'd have gone off once the guests left.

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  • what the what?

    I can't believe the nerve of some people. I got several handmade items for DD and each one brought me to tears because they were so sweet and well done. Little bonnets, socks, quilts. I can't imagine being so ungrateful regarding a handmade good. Can't teach people class I guess. Ugh.
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  • ValancyyValancyy
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Photogenic First Anniversary
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    edited July 2014

    I am horrified that someone would even think this was okay.  None of the handmade blankets and quilt (we received several) matched our nursery.  Who cares.  You keep the blankets forever, they aren't going to match every décor you ever choose for your rooms. 

    Making something by hand involves much more thought and work than buying something off of a registry.  If I had made it, I would have just taken it back and gifted it to someone who would appreciate it.

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    aditigirl
  • msspeedymarie, I am sorry you doubt me and I only wish I was making things up.  I came her for some unbiased support with a situation I wasn't sure how to deal with and have received lots of helpful advice.   Not sure what more to say...
  • I still have all of the handmade items that were given to my kids when they were born - they are some of the most cherished things I have from their childhood.  I don't quilt, sew, or knit but I can only imagine how that might hurt.
  • No worries  :)
  • What a douche! I got 3 different hand made quilts at my shower and I love them all. They don't match my nursery at all but we used them a lot for tummy time and now that LO is old we will use them in the fall in the carriage or for snuggling on the couch. So much hard work and time is spent into making handmade gifts. 
  • I can be a bitch, but I am not one for making a scene. In this case though, I would've said something to the hostess and the MTB. The fact that both of them were so beyond rude would deserve a little shower humiliation IMHO. 

    Thinking that this entitled MTB is about to be a parent is terrifying.
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  • "Thinking that this entitled MTB is about to be a parent is terrifying"

    Agreed!

  • That is absolutely disgusting. Not only being so ungrateful for something made with love and caring, but to make it clear that it was unwanted. Even if it was a purchased item, i find it abhorrent the hostess would find it acceptable to inform the giver that the MTB wanted to get rid of it. I received two blenders for my wedding, so one had to be returned, but I never told either of the guests who gave them (and of course sent them both thank you notes thanking them for their gifts)...and that return was for a PRACTICAL reason, not the capricious nonsense of fitting in with decor. SMH. Some people.
     
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  • YogaSandyYogaSandy
    500 Love Its Third Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
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    edited August 2014
    Besides the fact that it was handmade with love, quilting can be quite expensive. My mother is a quilter and I know how much the fabric alone cost for the quilt she made for our wedding present. It is ridiculous. Then add the time on top of that. Then add the sentiment and love put into it.

    ETA: not that my mom advertised how much she spent on it. We were talking about the price of fabric once when she was going to take her quilts into my friend's family studies class (I'm a high school teacher) and she let it slip.
  • So rude! I'm sure that woman will make a delightful mother. Bless her heart.
  • If that were my DIL I'd be seriously questioning my son's (or daughter's) judgement. She obviously didn't become that rude overnight. And that hostess. Sad what our society is becoming :(
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User]
  • There's a whole lot of tackiness going on here. Who, whether host or MTB, acts like that, ever? I would have taken my gift back and unfriended, stat.

    TB is dead.




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  • My mom always gets mad at me at gift giving events.  I never, ever say anything rude about the gift, but apparently it shows all over my face if I don't like it.  I am a horrible liar and don't have a poker face at all. It gets me in trouble in some gift receiving situations.



  • What an effing brat. Jesus Christ. :-O

     

     

     

  • That is so horrible! Sure, I got things at bridal showers I didn't register for, and shoot, I'll admit some things I knew I already had or straight up didn't like! But I smiled genuinely and said thank you because HOLY CRAP someone took the time, energy, and money to buy me a gift and for that alone I appreciated it!!!!!!!
    My own mother embarrassed the crap out of me at a friends bridal shower. A very close friend of mine crocheted some pot holders for the bride. Anyone remember those little squares with the yarn that we used to make when we were kids? From a distance, yes, those potholders slightly resembled those. But up close you could see the detail of how pretty they were. What does my near sighted mama do? She blurts out "What, did you make those when you were 4?!?"
    *Sigh* I had to explain to her in the car how insensitive that was and she called my friend sobbing out an apology.  At least she apologized though...sheesh. Some people have no manners.
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  • sj+cm131 said:

    My mom always gets mad at me at gift giving events.  I never, ever say anything rude about the gift, but apparently it shows all over my face if I don't like it.  I am a horrible liar and don't have a poker face at all. It gets me in trouble in some gift receiving situations.

    WTF
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    [Deleted User]aditigirlstarzcookie22
  • I think home made quilts are gorgeous! Can't believe she'd be that rude though in general.
  • *hold on a minute, while I pick up my jaw*

    I would have been so offended. This is my worst fear as a quilter. I put so much time (and money) into making them and always worry that it will not be used or stuffed away never to be seen again. I am not sure how I would have reacted, other than secretly (maybe not so secretly) wanting my precious quilt back. 
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  • Wow. So ungrateful and bitchy. I would've taken my quilt back and left!!!
  • nilvero said:
    what?? That's horrible! I received two homemade blankets and I was just touched by someone taking time out of their busy days (one of them is pregnant herself!) to make it for me.

    I don't get people. 
    Ditto. I've both received and given handmade blankets, and I know how much time and love goes into them. Some people just have no class.

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