TTC and who did you tell

ihartbb

Did you share with anyone that you're TTC? Or are you and DH keeping it on the DL until it actually happens?

ihartbb

Yep I agree!!! I told his sisters bc were close and they're patient!! Don't want any pressure

MiraK03

I haven't told anyone. Don't really want people asking about it if it ends up taking us a long time.

SpartanChick88

Five people know outside of us and my docs.  They ask no questions. They are not related to either of us

lucy2113

We told out very close friends. Nobody asks for updates its not brought up unless we say something. And we don't. I also told you ladies. Does that count? 

dmsmth

my sister, sil, a friend from out of state and 3 local friends.

My parents HAD to be told because I had to have emergency sx to have my mirena pulled and if I had to stay in the hosp longer than a day they were going to have to fly out in a days notice to watch my kids so dh could go back to work.

I have since told them that we were going to wait a few months, so they thankfully have not asked about it again yet.

kdecker2009

We decided not to tell any one in our family. We don't want to be asked a thousand times if we're pregnant yet. We felt that the more people who know, the more pressure there would be. And I reaaaallllyyyy do not want to hear about my parents' or my in-laws' experiences ttc.

Gizmo36

Almost everyone but my mother knows.  We told my H's family after we hit the year mark to basically shut them up.  I told my close friends early in the process.  No one has ever tried to give me advice.  No one asks for updates.  They know that I'll bring something up if I feel like talking about it.  One of my SILs is in a similar position, so it's actually nice having someone IRL going through the same thing to talk to.  

My mom has enough stress/issues to deal with in her own life to know that we are having trouble.  I just don't want to burden her with that and give her one more thing to worry about.

Jags8

I told my mom (it kind of accidentally came out), one of my sisters, and a couple of my friends.

No one has asked me for updates. The closest thing to "asking" is last month when a friend asked my sister and I to grab a drink after Zumba, and my sister quietly asked me on the side if I could drink.

DaikokuJess

We chose not to tell any family because they've already been pestering us for 8 years. We finally told them we chose not to have kids because it was getting so bad. We did tell our closest core group of friends (3 couples) because none of them has kids and we knew this would really change the dynamic of the group. Since telling them, 2 of the 3 couples has gotten KU.

~Mrs.Wise~

Our families know (we've been married 8 years, it's hard to keep it a a secret at this point) but I also have endometriosis so they are understanding and really great.

Bee1112

No one knows. It's none of their business. And I see the way my MIL pressures my SIL and questions her every time they see each other because she knows they are trying.

spiltmilkz

Told my closest friend and my SIL who is also my best friend. Just those two knew until we had the miscarriage. Now our families know we were trying. We are tta now but we probably won't tell anyone when we start trying again.

catwine

I told my best friends and H told his best friend.  I got a lot of support and positivity from one friend, and not so much from the other.  H's friend is just excited he gets to be an 'uncle' someday. We didn't tell our families because they would likely not approve.  They thought we were too young to get married and buy a house so I doubt they think we can hande a baby.

Ladymouse

I told my mom for several reasons, the chief being in case secondary IF becomes an issue.  I'm not making travel plans more than 3 months in advance while TTC, and her parents are always wondering when we'll visit again - this way she'll deflect them instead of grilling me.  She knows I'd call her ASAP if I got pregnant anyway - this way she knows it's planned.

If we told MIL, she'd just get way too excited EVERY time DH called her.

No one else has reason to care or know.  If it comes up though, I don't avoid mentioning it.  

I also told an old friend to explain why I didn't know when I'd be visiting home again.  She said she'd wondered if/when we would TFAS, but thought it impolite to ask.

Wine&Cupcakes

I had to tell my parents because I had questions associated with my metabolic disorder as I didn't need treatment until TTC. We told DH parents because my diet changed so drastically that it was noticeable and we wanted to head off questions. They have both been more than respectful.

Other than that, I have told two other friends who began TTC this and last month, one of whom is already pregnant. I'm fine telling them if we have problems getting pregnant and know they won't ask.

BabyCowbell

I told my three closest friends and my husband told his best friend. His friend used to ask us for updates a lot but that's slowed. One of my friends ask but she's TTC as well so we chat about it anyway.

We're probably going to tell our parents soon since we're going to start going to an RE, I can never find the right way to transition to that topic so maybe we will keep not talking about it.

cateyes543

The first couple of months we didn't tell anyone. Over the next couple of months we told a few close friends. Last week we told my family as I was tired of being asked when we were ever going to start having kids. As the months have progressed we have shared with more people, but not the whole world. 

BillyHorrible

I've never told anyone IRL whenever we've TTC.  I don't need monthly checkins, and we don't tell anyone till second trimester anyway, so I don't want to have to lie to people if they knew they were trying and asked how it was going.

menta84

I told one of my best friends and she has been supportive. No family nor other friends know. There was a point in my life where I thought I didn't want kids at all so everyone just assumes I still think that way and I get no questions. It is very nice not to have to talk about this with anyone; when it happens then we will happily tell everyone.

MrsDee1982

My parents, sister and brother know.  And a few of our close friends.  That's it.  And they are all very supportive and patient.  

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ihartbb

We told MIL and SILs bc they are super supportive! My mom knows and is very excited! I haven't told my best friend as she is single and has no children and may not understand as well. I have told two besties, and DH told his brother who is also his best friend! My sister wasn't as supportive saying "your life your decision" our family and friends won't pressure or ask for updates!!!

SayAnything84

My BFF knew right away, but we are very close and have always shared those kinds of things with eachother, she doesn't pressure me or give me advice, I like knowing that I can call her and talk about it.

When we first started no one knew except my BFF. Then we had a loss at 18 weeks so everyone knew we would probably try again, but I made it very clear to  that it wasn't up for discussion. I actually cut a friend out of my life bc she wouldn't stop asking about it.

bccc13

I told my mom and sister because they have/had similar issues TTC. My SIL because we are very close. And my h and mine best friends (2 couples). I have never had anything but support and positivity from them.

We have not told my mil, I want to because she is nicely and politely dropping hints. I feel like if she knew she would know that we aren't waiting just might take a little longer. Also I have to figure out how to bring it up.

lindsayanne14

Both of our parents know we are thinking of TFAS...we haven't made it sound like a very serious attempt to his parents yet. I at least wanted my mom to have some idea since she watchs DS while we work and will be watching a 2nd too. I wanted her to have time to adjust!

3houlagirl

Nobody knows. I'd love to tell my best friend, but her mom is my mom's best friend, and it would be asking for trouble.

Since nobody knows, I'm having fun thinking of fun ways to tell them when/if we're pregnant. It'll be the best joke ever.

LisaG09

I'd told my best friend and my sister at first. They were super supportive. After we miscarried though, I think a lot of people assume that we are trying again. They saw how excited we were to be parents. I've told my best friend, my sister, a co-worker, my roommate and my mom. I told my mom though only because she asked. I don't regret telling anyone and nobody has made anything seem weird. 

divinemsbee

Right now, pretty much everyone that's important in our lives knows one way or another. No one rides my ass about it, but we've always had the opposite problem of most people. We never had people asking us when we were going to have kids, but always had people asking us if we were going to wait a little longer to have them because that would be better.

When we first started, my BFF is the only one who was told specifically and she's been a rock. I'm pretty sure my parents knew we would start trying. After my first loss my parents and grandmother were told, and I think H told his parents then. It's slowly become more open to family, and I find myself being more open with my friends here. Now that I'm having surgery, H's immediate command knows because he wanted to tell them. All in all, at this point we find it better to tell, at least a bare bones of what is going on, so that we avoid too much awkwardness.

willowprincess

Super close friends and family know, but that's mainly because they know we don't personally believe in using bc. So technically we are always "trying".

purple_2012

I told my mom just so I could have her support if I needed it. I think she told my dad because he brought it up in conversation today. So other than those two, nobody else knows.

Kput

As of now, only you all and obviously DH knows. Last time, a decent amount of friends knew but no family.

Jewels2010

Just our a few of very close friends. They're all patient and don't pressure us with questions. 

jlo629

Only person who knows is my best friend (well I am guessing her husband knows too).  They live a few hours away now and are also planning on starting TTC soon.  They had tried for 2 months and then found out about having to move to the next state so they stopped.  She was all upset it did not happen in those 2 months like it should of just happened right away because they are having sex and yet they both work in the medical field and they were not temping or anything. 

We are planning a trip to go visit them in August and she is already asking if I will be able to drink then or not.  I was a bit annoyed.

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ginger1228

We haven't told anyone. There are two good friends of mine and my cousin that I would tell if they asked, but I probably won't bring it up.

momtosam

We are not really sharing that we are officially TTC. A few of my closest friends know, but we know everything about each other. That is all. Definitely will not be telling family cause I really do not want them asking questions or adding pressure.

garnetandgoldgrace

I am pretty open about telling people we are TTC. I don't mind talking about it and am open to educating people as much as possible. I think the more I talk to people about it the less pressure I get because they understand it's not as easy as they think. 

Alyssa7012

I havent told anyone except my gyno, he wrote me a scrip for pnv because theyre cheaper through my insurance than buying otc.

I mentioned to my friend we were thinking of trying, but never went into details. No parents just because it hasnt been a year yet and its easier that way.

My mom would be "supportive" but would probably try to make us hold off a while just because she says that she wants my niece to be older so she can spoil any new baby. without them being so close together. (Niece just turned 1yo in May)

mjcbwlbaby

My best friend knows because she is my best friend. My MIL knows because she's seriously the best MIL ever and is not pushy and she's the type to pray for us rather than try to give us unwanted advice. I told her before I told my own mother. So my mom knows.... The mother of the kids I nanny knows because I have so many dr appts and I don't want her to think I'm dying or something. Ummm and like one other friend knows. And my hairdresser because she's a hairdresser and we talk lol. But I don't tell people unless I trust them not to act weird.

FJM85

My sister and my two best friends know. They won't put pressure on us or ask unnecessary questions, but they are there for support when I need it.