Anyone else scared to death of the labor pains?

xoxoxox

This is my 3rd baby boy, and still, I'm scared to death to feel the contractions once I'm in labor. It almost consumes me. I hate the unknown of when I will go into labor - and how fast I might progress. Last baby I was in labor just 4 hours and didn't even have time for an epidural, and it was HELL

We are in Germany (army) and I hear they are pretty against pain medication - they are all natural here.

Am I the only one that's scared to death of the pain??

PineApple85

I definitely have anxiety.  I went med-free last time by choice and I am planning to go med-free again.  Not looking forward to it.  X_X

emoxymoose

So you're delivering at a German hospital in the community? I'm just confused because hospitals owned by the Armed Forces aren't going to refuse you pain meds.

Edit: autocorrect

xoxoxox

There's no hospital in our post - so yes, I'll be delivering at a German hospital

angelajo19

With my first my water broke at home and I almost immediately started having contractions a minute apart. And it was like that for the next 10 hours. One of my nurses said she'd never seen anything like it. Haha! That being said, while I'm nervous about going through it again, I still stand by what I've been saying ever since...I'd much rather go through labor pain than the morning sickness. At least I knew the labor pain would be over really soon...

xoxoxox

Apparently they can give you a "walking epidural" which I understand wears off in like 2 hours

Lilwatz

Yes. Terrified.

xoxoxox

Is it sad that I would prefer c-section?

emoxymoose

No, I don't think so. (In regards to c sec) Anxiety about birth is a real thing. I had a light epi with my first and I was able to move my legs and feel to push, but it took any real pain away. I don't know if that helps, but I'd say that if you want pain meds push for them. It's no different than being against them and standing your ground.

Eta: clarity

KTgator

I was you last time-- so scared I wanted a csec, and didn't question the dr when he (out of convenience for himself) told me just to schedule a csec. Horrible mistake-- it's MAJOR abdominal surgery, requires weeks of recovery and pain meds, and complicates each subsequent birth. I would suggest reading some materials on evidence based birth. I have found this time that understanding the science and process of birth is releasing any fear I have in regards to pain. Ina May Gaskin has great books, Birthing from Within is good as well. I plan to have a home birth this time, and have read a lot about how when you don't fear birth you can control the "pain" of childbirth better. Here's to hoping!

JustJainey

I know I don't want a C-section because I've had multiple abdominal surgeries and that's just no fun - can't imagine caring for an infant too.  That being said, just don't know what to expect in terms of the labour pains.  I've experienced some pretty extreme pain in the past, but well - they've always given me really, really good drugs *lol*  It just seems to me like this should be a different kind of pain?  But maybe that's just ludicrous and pain is just pain....

Ineedmorecoffee

I am, but I am more scared of the aftermath. The ripping, the yeast infections, the bleeding nipples, the hormones, etc. Scared. to. death.

Ineedmorecoffee

PineApple85 said:

I definitely have anxiety.  I went med-free last time by choice and I am planning to go med-free again.  Not looking forward to it.  X_X

Me too! I am scared about being able to go through all of that again

silverwings72

I'm scared to death. I'm a big baby when it comes to pain.

CarrieAnne09

I'm more scared of the healing after than the actual labour. Dealing with tears... and my first poop.... X_X

I KNOW that this is going to hurt and I KNOW that its not going to be easy but there's no other choice so theres nothing I can do but make sure I am as prepared and as informed as possible for the actual birth and know that it is temporary.... (but yes I'm scared as hell)

Alid86

I was not scared the first time around with DD. This time I am!!! Probably because I know more what to expect! I'm just praying and trusting God to get me through it and reminding myself that womens' bodies were made for this!

carafern

I'm not scared of the labor pain. Like PPs have said, I figure millions of women have done this and I'm as strong as any of them (or at least I hope so!). I am scared of the labor not progressing and having to get a c-sec or complications.

I just read something that said that everyone basically has the same (or similar) threshold for pain and that it really is just about fear…so if you're afraid of the pain it will likely be more painful because you're tense and scared… or something like that? I can't remember which of the birthing books that was in.

Edit because I think I sounded too nonchalant about pain and fear… I see giving birth as an amazing thing but also crazy. Having a baby come out of my body is awesome and scary. My "preparation" is trying to be confident and unafraid. 

jac409

This time around I am way more scared of having a newborn in the house again with a 22 month old on top of it than I am of labor. Last time around I was the complete opposite. I was terrified of the labor pains, but not worried about having a newborn at all. This time I know that labor is very short compared to what comes next.

rox825

I don't think I'm really scared of the pain, I'm more scared of things going wrong or the baby being in distress, other complications. And I'm super terrified of needing an emergency c section. I figure if the pain starts to be too much there's the epidural option and if it's too late, worst case scenario it'll be bad but brief, at least there's an end point!

mussalynn

jac409 said:

This time around I am way more scared of having a newborn in the house again with a 22 month old on top of it than I am of labor. Last time around I was the complete opposite. I was terrified of the labor pains, but not worried about having a newborn at all. This time I know that labor is very short compared to what comes next.

Yep. This.

lizgrace03

I wouldn't say I'm scared. I'd say a mild sense of dread more accurately describes how I feel. I plan to take the meds and just try to stay focused on meeting LO.

Kristil2014

I am not really afraid of the pain. I am more a afraid of the labour not progressing. I am planning a birth at a birth center with a MW.

xoxoxox

I'm so glad that I'm not alone in my fear. The aftermath of giving birth is bad - the cracked nipples, baby blues, hemmeroids, being super sore down there and just all the emotions of having a new person in your routine.... But to me, that's all a piece of cake compared to the pains of contractions

jlove253

I think I'm more afraid of the pushing, or more specifically the compulsion to push. There was a point with dd where I felt like if I couldn't push her out I was going to die, and I think that mentally psyched me out way more than the pain hurt. I'm hopeful this time for a better overall experience.

mander82

I don't expect any part of the birthing process to be pleasant. I am trying not to think about it.

AnnieRoo13

At this moment I'm not really afraid. I am probably extremely naive because I'm a FTM, but I am trying to tell myself that women have done this forever so I can do it too.

I was feeling really scared a few weeks ago and started watching "One Born Every Minute" which made me more afraid at first. After watching many episodes showing many different women giving birth it made me less afraid and more confident. It's not going to be easy, but being afraid of the inevitable is counterproductive.

Whenever I'm nervous about something I remind myself of all the dumb people that have done it before me and tell myself that if they've done then I certainly can too.

ccam

Its also different when you're 40 weeks pregnant and ready for that baby to come! You'll pretty much do anything to get him or her out - you go into some super mom mode. And a CS is no walk in the park either! Recovery can be rough, I wouldn't wish for it.

Miss Holiday

I'm not afraid of labour, kind of looking forward to getting to experience it.

I'm nervous about when it comes time to push, I'm clostrophobic, so in my head I think of baby getting stuck in the birth canal or something! Because it's a small space! Ha ha
Irrational fears is what I have, not pain ones.

Melodyhay

I am afraid of being in intense pain for hours on end and knowing that I'm actually having this baby. I'm pretty sure there will be cussing. (I still want to go as natural as possible, but at the hospital) The reward of my healthy baby in my arms will be sweet and worth it though.

crystaldh

I'm not too afraid, but as a FTM, I don't know what I'm getting myself into. What is really scaring me is that it's mostly the FTMs that are not too afraid (like me) and the STMs+ that are! Uh oh.

xoxoxox

My first baby it was ok because I was in labor for 14 hours and got my epidural. My second baby came fast - no time for an epi and I had to feel all the pain. I'm pretty much traumatized!!

Acedit

I to am in Germany and will be delivering at a German hospital in Oct/Nov time frame and I am so scared of everything that has to do with labor. I know I will make it through, I have been reading birthing books and pray that my mind will do me right when the big day comes.  I will be sure to let my doc know that I am all for meds..... so to have them ready. Lol!!

missnacholover

I'm not too nervous.  I'm a blissfully naive FTM.  And I'm not against an epidural at all. 

I'm more nervous that DH is going to get on my nerves, haha.

ETA: and I'm also nervous that no one will remember to bring me my big ole Italian Sub push present.

Allisonville

Complications, things going wrong - sure, mildly worried. But the pain doesn't concern me. Even if it sucks, pain is temporary.

Sarahbeth612

Just wanted to say I feel for you, OP! DH's best friend and his wife are in Germany and she told me she asked for "medicines in the back" (love her accent) she had never heard of an epidural before I mentioned it, and they refused her. All turned out fine but they sound hardcore over there. FX it goes smoothly for you!

xoxoxox

Sounds exactly like my last baby, but my water didn't break - just started getting contractions. 4 hours later he was here, and that's why I'm so traumatized!! The pain... Ugh.....

MillerBabyOne

I am also delivering in Germany (AF) and am scared of the low pain meds. Apparently it's a walking epidural and only lasts a couple of hours. I guess we'll see how it goes. Good luck.

kstirton

I'm really just trying not to think about it too much and when I start - I just remind myself of the millions upon millions of other women that have gone through it - I mean, it's kind of a right of passage LOL. But w/ that being said I will 100% be doing the epidural no questions asked and if a C-section if brought up and will be totally a-ok with that too.

absolutelymaybe

I'm actually not scared for several reasons...

• I'm birthing twins and thus have no expectations of how anything is going to go. It's going to be a game-day "Let's Get 'Er Done" type scenario, and I'm open to anything that gets my babies outside and safe.
• My birth plan includes instructions like, "Give me the drugs. All the drugs. Don't ask. Just give them NOW!" (Sort of kidding, but seriously, I plan to have this birth as medicated as possible.)
• Providing the meds don't work and my ideal doped-up birth scenario doesn't happen, it's not like I can just change my mind. "Sorry! This sucks! Can we stop now?" Might as well grin and get through it. I can't change my situation, only my attitude.