Post-Baby Name Change: Yay or Nay? — The Bump
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Post-Baby Name Change: Yay or Nay?

BumpJackieBumpJackie member
1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
edited July 2014 in Baby Showers
If you didn't change your last name after tying the knot, did you change it once you were pregnant or baby was born?

Post-Baby Name Change: Yay or Nay? 141 votes

Yes
35% 50 votes
No
64% 91 votes
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Re: Post-Baby Name Change: Yay or Nay?

  • I think it's really up to you!
    I assume your baby has the fathers last name?
    If you weren't initially compfortable changing your surname then maybe just keep yours. but if you really want to change it now, then go ahead! Nothing wrong with changing your name now :)


    snippet17[Deleted User]
  • We're considering this right now. I don't think I will change my last name. BUT what do we name our baby? We are strongly considering Baby MomsLastName DadsLastName. It will be long, but I don't much care. Our other option is simply Baby DadsLastName. But I don't want there to be any disconnection from me. So, the pondering continues! :)

    imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage
    My BLOG: www.ivfbabyquest.wordpress.com -Update - old blog.

    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
    Me: 42, Hubby: 35, TTC since Jan 2010. Dx: DOR due to advanced maternal age. Also: Hypothyroidism (100mcg Levothyroxin). Positive for MTHFR (hetero-C677T), Factor V Leiden, and Fragile X (on DH side). Taking pre-natal vitamins
    .
    First natural PG 9/27/11; mc: 1/20/12
    First RE visit: 8/8/12, Saline Sonogram: 8/28/12, IVF injection class: 10/11/12, add FaBB Tab for FVL, +Vitamin D.
    IVF #1
    : 10/17/12 Baseline: FSH- 9.4, E2- 24, LH- 3.7, Prog- 0.3 The u/s showed 6 follicles in my right  & 9 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 10/21/12: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning.
    ER 10/28/12: 13 Retreived. 7 Mature. 6 Fertilized. 5 Made it to PGS. ET 11/2/12: CANCELED. All 5 came back from PGS as having "severe abnormalities."
    IVF #2: 1/7/13 Baseline: FSH- 8.8, 4 follicles in my right & 6 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle & 150 Menopur SQ nightly. 1/11/13: Add Ganirelix SQ every morning. hCG Trigger 1/16/13
    ER 1/18/13: 9 Retrieved. 5 Mature. 5 Fertilized. 2 Made it to PGS. ET 1/23/13: CANCELED. All embryos (he even sent the ones not growing) came back from PGS as having "multiple severe abnormalities."
    IVF #3:
    NEW RE! 3/1/13 Baseline: FSH- 9.6, E2- 61, Prog- 0.94, 3 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 150 Bravelle& 150 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/7/13: Add Ganirelix SQ in AM. hCG Trigger 3/9/13 SQ.
    ER 3/11/13: 6R, 2M, 2F. Day 3: one 8 cell, grade 0.  Five day ET 3/16/13: one early blast, grade Fair. 3/24/13 AF came a day before beta. BFN

    IVF #4: (Added acupuncture to this cycle.) 3/25/13 WTF & Baseline: FSH-11.8, E2- 56, Prog- 0.84 3/26/13 Start stims. 3/30/13 u/s: 5 follicles in my right & 4 in my left. Rx: 225 Bravelle& 225 Menopur SQ in PM. 3/31/13 Add Ganirelix SQ in AM.hCG Trigger 4/3/13 SQ.
    ER 4/5/13: 5R, 3M, 3F naturally. Day 3: two 8 cell, grade 0, one 8 cell, grade 2 (Scale 0-best to 3-worst). Five day ET 4/10/13: two blastocysts (the 3rd stopped growing.) Beta 4/18/13: 2.5 BFFN. RE recommends we stop trying and focus on living childless, due to the extremely poor quality of my eggs.
    ***
    Decided to stop trying and live CFNBC. I couldn't adjust. So, six months later...
    IVF #5: Changed RE. Going to one of the big name clinics now. OWDU: 10/29/13. Update: HORRIBLE experience. Disgusted and distraught at their complete unprofessionalism and how much money and precious time they cost us. Sickening. Have now changed RE again. New Patient appt. 1/30/14.
    BFP! Out of nowhere, I got KU the old fashioned way! POAS 1/26/14 - Positive! FDLM 12/30/13. Beta #1 16dpo= 373. Beta #2 18dpo= 801. EDD 10/6/14
    2/4/14 1st U/S revealed a 5wk2day sac but no fetal pole. Started 200mgs of progesterone suppositories daily
    2/11/14 2nd U/S revealed a perfect 6wk1day "diamond ring" embryo with a beating heart! 138bpm! Add 1mg folic acid and 40mg Lovenox
    2/25/14 3rd U/S: perfect 8w1d embryo, 178bpm. 3/6 start spotting. 3/11 10w1d U/S shows no heartbeat. Scheduling D&C. The Stork has forsaken me again.
    IVF #5.2: New in-state RE. Supplement priming for 1.5 cycles prior to start of cycle, including DHEA 50mg (stopped 5/15), CoQ10 200mg 2x/day, L-Arginine- 1000mg 2x/day (stopped 6/5 due to cold sore!), myo-inositol- 2g 2x/day, melatonin- 3mg, and Neevo (prenatal for MTHFR).
    5/16/14 Day 2 bw cycle prior: FSH- 12.22, E2- 38.37, Prog- 1.35, LH- 9.46. 6/2/14 Day 19 bw: Prog- 23
    6/12/14 Baseline: E2- 122.7, Prog- 0.4. 5 follicles in left, 4 follicles in right. Start stims: 375IU Follistim & 150IU Menopur. 6/19 Increase Follistim to 425IU, Menopur still 150IU. 6/18 add Ganirelix. 6/23 Ovidrel trigger SQ. 6/25 ER: 8R, 8M, 5F naturally. Start Medrol & Doxy. 6/26 Start Endometrin. 7/2 Start Lovenox.
    7/8/14 Beta= 137.4 BFP!!! (My first from IVF!) E2- 1109, Prog- >60. Stop CoQ10, myo-inositol, and melatonin. 7/9 2nd Beta= 281.4. TSH- 2.70. Increasing Synthroid to 100mcg daily. 7/24 6w3d u/s measured 6w3d, hb: 121bmp! 8/5 8w1d u/s measured 8w3d, hb: 164bpm! Graduated from RE to OB. Now I just need to find an OB!
    EDD 3/18/15!

  • If you do both last names are you also going to have a middle name?
  • I think having both last name or a hyphenated name is a bad idea. I work in an office setting and people with those kinda names always get lost in the shuffle because they don't always use both names. So I would say pick a name and stick with it.  

  • gemmafiggemmafig member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Answer
    edited February 2015
    I work in health care, and advise against hyphenation. My $0.02, but it gets very complicated, and frustrating, for the parents as well as the pharmacy, doctor, insurance. We know lots of people whose kids have the dads last name, or the moms last name. But, the parents don't share the same last name. It is what you are comfortable with. There is no right way anyway.
    Also, check your state's law about changing your last name so far after the wedding. If that is the route you want to go. PA only gives you so long after the wedding, and then you have to get a lawyer and have the court approve it.
  • We are in a strange situation because we haven't changed our names. Mainly because my husband took his ex wife's last name and I didn't want to take it as my own. We are going to give the baby my last name, and my husband is now feeling some pressure to take my last name!
    CafeMom Tickers

  • I am going to change my name in a couple of months (after a trip out of the country, don't want to mess with anything passport-wise yet. Long story, but my husband changed his last name from his mom's name to his dad's. It was supposed to be done before we got married, but there was an issue with the court date and it didn't get done till after. Since he legally had his old name when we married, I couldn't change my name to his new name with the traditional marriage change. Thus, I have to go through a legal name change to take his name. We've been married five years, and I go socially by his name, but legally still have my maiden name because it's a big hassle to change. I do plan to get this done before baby is born in November, because i want the same last name as my child.
  • I'm in a weird situation. I live in ga and the baby isn't born yet. However I have a female fiancé. We are planning to get married and I am taking her name, but ga doesn't look at partners for birth certificates. So the baby wil be born and have to take my last name. Then she will go through second parent adoption and adopt the baby leaving me my rights and taking over hers. The baby can then have her last name , and we will marry and I will as well. Complicated but this is what I want
  • I didn't change my name and don't plan to, but we are planning to give the baby a first name, my last name for middle, and then my husbands last name. That way she has her dads name, without the confusion of a hyphenated name but still has some connection to my name.
  • Elsa1984Elsa1984 member
    5000 Comments 250 Love Its Fourth Anniversary Photogenic
    edited June 2015
    We had been together for five years before our daughter was born. She was going to have his last name, but honestly, it was a PAIN at the hospital we were at. Everything was listed under Baby Girl MaidenName or FirstName MaidenName. Even though we were filling out paperwork and continuously saying it was Baby Girl LegalName or FirstName LegalName. Due to hospital policy, babies of unwed mothers automatically get the maiden name for their last name. Even in the hospital, when they did things like hearing tests, they would say "she is under this name in the computer, but her is her certificate with the name you want to give her". Which meant that when we went for followup appointments, there were FOUR different names that she could have been listed under, and we were left standing there saying "try this one.........okay, try this one.....". We honestly didn't know what her name was, until her social security card came in the mail (thankfully, it was correct). 

    When it came to the birth certificate, she was given my last name, and her dad wasn't listed. We had to take documents to be notarized, he had to raise his hand and swear that he believed he was the father, and we had to send it to our state capital for documentation....and to get a birth certificate with him listed. After we got it in the mail, we were (supposed) to take it to our county clerk and have them update it to show that he was to be on the birth certificate. We never took it in, since we have the original copy. 

    Boy was it a HEADACHE! I told him that if we weren't married by the time we had kid #2, it was getting my last name because I wasn't going through all of that nonsense again!

    Edited to add: We did eventually get married and have been together for 9 years, so it would automatically get his last name the next go round!
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