Baby + transatlantic flight = crazy?

danuli8

So my MIL and SIL are in Germany (which makes sense since they are Germans) and they would really like to see the little man in person. MIL is asking her doctor about flying to the US to see us, but she is over 70 and has some pretty serious medical issues and I have a feeling the doc is going to say no. My SIL already said that she doesn't think MIL can hack an 8-hour flight.

Which means DH and DS and I would have to fly there. Until he is 2 he can fly on a lap. If I buy him his own seat (which is super spendy, like 90% of an adult fare spendy), I have to restrain him in a car seat that I bring on board. (Oof. Car seats are HEAVY.) So WWYD? Fly there and give DS his own seat, fly there and keep him on a lap (or try to), or pray to all the gods that MIL can actually come here instead? Have any of you done this and lived? I'm all ears! Go!

tondraluv

We haven't done this YET but we just planned a trip across the pond for March.  My Travel Agent (who's a close friend), is looking for night time flights (as suggested above) and that we get him his own seat.

JSS1002

1) Start praying and ask for help

2) Buy a seat for LO and book a night flight; invest in benadryl.... and wine.

:-)

I know it is expensive but I think everybody (including those around you) will be happier if LO has his own seat!

NDarya

I'm from May BMB but I'm a long time lurker on this board as my initial due date was April. So, I'm sorry to intervene but here is my actual experience:

Right now I live in Kuwait as my DH is posted there for work. Summer temperatures there are insane (125F) so he sent us home for Summer. I flew alone with 14mo in my lap. Kuwait-DC - 13 hours - 6 hours layover - DC-final destination - 1h30min. I thought it was insane and I would never survive but here I am!

So, I'd say it's just a matter of comfort for everybody but you can totally do lap. My ticket was $1500. There was no way we'd pay the same amount for DS. They still charged us $200 for DS on my lap. Yes it was hard but DS was a trooper and it went well. My lifesavers were: the bassinet row seat, his favorite shows on my kindle, snacks/pouches, couple of fav toys, boppy travel pillow (just for support if the kid sleeps). Except you can rotate who holds the baby. And yes, night flight would help a lot.

Good luck!

Zelda925

I flew with my daughter at 13 weeks to Germany. It's a long flight and the military laid so she had her own seat (which I was thankful for) because if I would have paid for it she would have been on my lap. I flew without my husband so it was nice to put her down when she was sleeping. I've flown on shorter distances with her in my lap and she was a handful (mainly teething). The motion is known to put them to sleep. Good luck and enjoy Germany!

danuli8

@cece2682, Thanks, that was a great article. I guess I will suck it up and buy a third seat.

skidderdo

@danuli8‌ worth it. We've hit some serious turbulence just flying to/from Chicago and I was always grateful to have my child buckled. Yes it's expensive but I'm not willing to put a price tag on my child's life.

Zelda925

Unfortunately I am about to do this tomorrow. My grandfather passed away in the States so Raz and I are flying back tomorrow. I am going to try to catch a military flight so I hope she gets her own seat since I'm 4.5 months pregnant and we are flying by ourselves. On a lighter note I hope to find out the gender today

bhjones1980

Get the seat, I just got home from a 4 hour flight with DS on my lap (with my Mother for extra help) and it was NOT FUN!

He was either struggling to get down to explore, crawling all over us like a monkey, or trying to get comfortable enough on me to nap.

I can not even imagine doing that on an 8 hour flight.

danuli8

@Zelda925, I'm sorry about your grandfather. I hope LO got her own seat.

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danuli8

Nothing like a fresh-from-the-trenches report! Clearly another vote in favor of "Buy him his own seat!!" Thanks, @CoffeeMonster19!

sashajm

I know this thread is several days old and I don't post very much but since we routinely do this (we live in Europe and I'm American), I thought I'd post my experience.  Plus I just did US to Europe on my own with DS. Pick the flight with the shortest flight time and shortest layovers!!  DS was a lap baby on the way to the U.S. (my husband was with me) but the plane wasn't completely full and we got 3 seats.  On the way back, I bought a seat for him.  I did not take a carseat (most carseats in the U.S. aren't approved for use in Europe and vice versa) and I ended up holding him on my lap for much of the time.  It was still good to have an extra seat to put stuff.  If someone in Germany has a carseat you can use while in Germany, you could get this instead so as to not lug a carseat around the airports: https://kidsflysafe.com  I know quite a few people who use this and love it.  Otherwise, you can get those carseat travel carts to roll your carseat around.  Good luck!

danuli8

@sashajm, thanks for chiming in with your experiences and for the link!

Zelda925

I just did this flight and even though Raz had her own seat she was so mobile she wouldn't stay in her car seat but like an hour of the trip. It was nice to have the seat to let her stand, look out the window, eat her snacks, etc. Man I wanted a drink on that flight, but I'm pregnant lol. I found it very difficult. Good luck!!

Zelda925

I just flew back from NC to Frankfurt 5 months pregnant with my almost 17 month old on my lap. I think that is pretty much what hell feels like. we took a night flight- which helped her sleep but I couldn't get comfortable holding her and trying to find a decent weight distribution. Again, good luck!!