9 months old and refusing to sleep at bedtime, help us!

Mama2be12345

So LO used to nurse to sleep, then when that stopped working I'd nurse her then rub her back and sing to her until she'd sleep, then when that stopped working we'd walk her in circles until she'd sleep. She doesn't like just being rocked in the chair and loves being walked around. We cosleep and once she's down she wakes a few times a night to eat but easily falls asleep. During the day I wear her in my woven wrap for naps or hold her. She often wakes if I sit down so I go for walks or get things done around the house. I don't mind but I don't get much me time.

So my problem is that I really need to find a way to help her go to sleep at night without me holding her until bedtime. I love our cuddles but DH and I need a little time together and I need a break. I've tried baby wearing and once she hits deep sleep I can lay her down, nurse her and then she'll stay asleep but even that didn't work tonight. We do a simple bedtime routine and bedtime is always right around 7:30. Lately she kicks and talks and just wants so badly to be awake. It's so hard!

Any advice? What are you guys doing at bedtime that works? Thanks for your help!

BlessedinMN

My DS is the same age and doing the same thing. As soon as he could crawl it was hopeless! We read the No-Cry Sleep Solution book and loved it. It has been helping a lot. Good luck!

ellenrunyon

Same here. Maybe she just doesn't need as much sleep? Our 8m old won't go down until 9 at the earliest. Lately she just snuggles up and moans for a few minutes. Dh and I just laugh & laugh...they sound like sex noises!

Unknown

This content has been removed.

ellenrunyon

aditigirl said:

ellenrunyon said:

Same here. Maybe she just doesn't need as much sleep? Our 8m old won't go down until 9 at the earliest. Lately she just snuggles up and moans for a few minutes. Dh and I just laugh & laugh...they sound like sex noises!

What a very... Odd thing to say.

Yes...we think it's super odd, but obviously she isn't doing it in a sexual way. Kids are so strange

MrsCrossley

My LO has changed bed times quite a few times since she even started having an actual "bedtime". She usually goes down 9-9:30 but I got lucky a few times last week & she was out at 8, & then for the past few nights she's been more on the 10:00 side.

You just gotta start making things more comfortable for YOU. You remind me a lot of myself, I never used to put her down & when she was asleep I'd just make myself comfortable because I knew I couldn't get up without her waking up. I became a slave to this little angel/monster & it was not fun. But of course, her needs came before mine, blah blah blah ......

Then one night my husband said he wanted to hold me & he missed being close & I said I couldn't because she'd wake up. so he talked enough shit to me (jokingly of course) which provoked me to just get up (like a stealthy ninja) & guess what? She was still asleep!

& that's when I realized it wasn't that big of a deal all along! Granted some nights it doesn't work as well, but other nights I can just jump up clumsily & she'll still be asleep. It's liberating!

I recommend you try this for the first time once you know she's completely out. I usually tap her forehead lightly or blow one quick puff of air on her face to see how she reacts (a trick I used as a kid to see if someone was fake-sleeping). If she reacts, she's not asleep enough, no reaction = party time

Oh & I also try to play a an hour or two before bedtime to make sure she's nice & sleepy once 9:00 strikes . Hope this helps

Unknown

This content has been removed.

LilyGR

What do you mean when you say that you hold her until bedtime? 1)You carry her in your arms with her laying down in them until she falls asleep? or 2)do you mean that you carry her around on your hip or in your lap until she is so tired that she falls asleep?

If you do #2 then you should try #1. Also, it pays to be consistent. If you start putting her to sleep, and you know that she is tired, then don't give up when she doesn't fall asleep for twenty minutes. Stick with it and she will learn that bedtime is bedtime.

Mama2be12345

Thanks everyone. We've been doing very consistent bath, book, nursing and then carrying her wrapped in a blanket in the dark room with her lullaby music on until she's deeply asleep then we lay her down and sneak out for a few hours, then join her on the bed. It's been heaven! Many nights she wakes for a quick comfort or wants to nurse but then falls right back asleep and I sneak back out. DH and I have so much time together again and she's a happy girl too. I appreciate everyone's helpful advice!