TTM about Facebook

Helenahhandbasket

Hi all.  STBXH is not taking our impending divorce well.  He's been mass requesting a lot of my FB friends, sending weird PMs to people and the like, so I have a few questions.

How did you manage your FB profile post break up?  Did you quickly remove/ hide all wedding/ couple pictures?  Did you change your "status" (married/ divorced).  Did you hide/ block your ex?

I know this is petty in the long run, but I am a little at a loss for what to do.

septmom11

i would probably block him for now at least.  he doesn't need to know your every move

MinnesotaMomma91

I deleated my facebook and made a new one blocked xh and his family. Thats made things easier for me personally

jellybean529

My XH moved out about ten days after we split and immediately blocked me from 99% of what he posted...come to find out after the fact from a mutual friend that he was trash talking me like crazy.

I mostly just spam pictures of DD and post funny things she says so I mostly left mine untouched other than to change my relationship status to "Separated". Once he started taking pictures I took of of DD and sharing them on his page I decided to block him from certain posts of mine. It just didn't seem fair to me that I was doing all the hard work of parenting and he was getting to share all the cute stuff on his page like he's some doting father when really he only sees her a couple days a month and, as evidenced by his last visit, doesn't really parent when he's with her. He's more "fun uncle" than "dad" at this point. 

Right now, I have different "Lists" of people and I have one that I use almost exclusively that blocks him and any other people who annoy the ever-loving shit out of me.. I also just completed an epic unfriending of people yesterday.

So sorry to hear he's not taking the split very well. IMO, I'd block him. Maybe his family too, so they don't report back to him.

20thirteen

When BD and I split up, I blocked him. We still have mutual friends and I told them that I usually don't request people do something as petty as pick sides but I did say if they wanted to be my friend still, they couldn't relay info to BD. I mostly deleted the mutual friends, I only requested that of the few I knew wouldn't share any info. Including his mother, btw. She wasn't even the one who informed him of DD's birth. I also vote to block your ex. Or manage your privacy setting so only you can see your friend list, info, etc.

Helenahhandbasket

Thanks ladies.  I am leaning towards blocking him.

What about couple-y and wedding pics?  Any advice?

20thirteen

Delete them.

20thirteen

Or, have someone you trust do it for you if you have trouble doing it. My sister deleted all the pictures of BD and I, and sent out requests to friends to untag BD or delete those pics too.

Helenahhandbasket

20thirteen said:

Or, have someone you trust do it for you if you have trouble doing it. My sister deleted all the pictures of BD and I, and sent out requests to friends to untag BD or delete those pics too.

Oh-- no trouble at all-- thanks for the advice!

jellybean529

I still have couply/wedding pictures up. I should delete them. :-P

20thirteen

I took pics off the Internet but I have a box of pics for DD when she's older. I'm not exactly sure how or when to bring it all up, but I want her to see what BD looks like.

freeatlast2014

I opened my first Facebook after our separation. He made one first and wrote "separated" and then followed with his plenty of fish add. I'm new to this but I think he closed his down but I don't have him, his friends, or family as my friend. And I think most of my stuff is private but I'm not sure. I did not put a status. Truth is - I'm embarrassed. Crazy, right?!?

20thirteen

I don't think that's crazy.