I am not sure if I have Postpartum Depression

gcamacho0816

My baby was born at 26 weeks and was in the hospital for 3 months. I felt sad when she was and went through an overwhelming feeling of emotions, which is normal considering everything my husband and I went through...we practically lived in the hospital. She came home June 2nd and I was happy for two weeks. I stopped pumping the week she came home because she was allergic to dairy. Then after the two weeks I started feeling overwhelmed and stressed out. My dad was sick so he couldn't help me. My sister has a 2 yr old and is a stay at home mom...my best friend has a baby and keeps me company when I feel like I need to get out...my husband take one day a week off of work to spend time with me. When I am alone and it has been several hours I feel the urge of being overwhelmed. I feel sad and angry that my baby had to be born early and go through so much. I blame myself even though I cannot think of anything I did wrong. I don't feel like hurting myself or my sweet baby girl, but I feel sad and alone when no one is here to help me. This is a tough adjustment because she is also miserable when she is gassy and colic. This makes me even more sad because I don't want to see her in pain. She takes meds for it and she has gotten better. You would think I would feel better but I don't. I feel like a terrible mother. I am having a hard time letting of what happened. I know you aren't docs, but should I seek help from a psychologist? Am I suffering from Postpartum Depression?

LaurenS865

PTSD and feelings of mommy guilt are pretty common for moms whose littles spent a lot of time in the NICU. I'm in the same boat as you - my daughter came home about a month and a half ago after 2 months in the hospital. After about 2 weeks I felt so overwhelmed and just bad, even though I should have been happy that she was home and healthy. I just made the step to start medication and counseling last week, so I haven't seen results yet, but I already feel better for having admitted that something isn't right.

deanna1313

I agree with @LaurenS865‌. Sounds like you have some symptoms of PPD. I first called my OB/GYN and they have been monitoring me and they referred me to the people I needed to see.
Good luck and I hope you get the help you need and feel better soon!

flcl

You have been through a lot with your LO.  It's normal for moms who have full term babies to be overwhelmed, sad, stressed and your start with your LO sounds traumatizing to say the least.  I think it's really good that you're reaching out for help from your DH and sister, keep doing so.  Have you gone in for your check up yet?  That's a great time to talk to your doctors about your feelings.  If your appointment is still a ways away, give them a call.  You can also check your hospital paperwork.  Mine had resources for moms who are struggling with PPD.  I'm not saying that you have PPD, it just seems like it would be beneficial for you to talk to someone about what you're going through.  GL.