My fucking cat is a dick!

cyprissa

I need to rant! What the fuck should I do with this beast? I've had him for 13 years and he HATES everyone but me and my husband. While he doesn't attack, he will take a swipe if other people get too close. But, the real deal is vengeful peeing. I've had him checked out a million times for issues and there aren't any health ones. We have 3 boxes, all of which are used by him except when he wants to make a statement like this morning...when DS1 woke up early and displaced the cat from our bed he went and peed on DS1's bed. What the fuck!!

cyprissa

Oh and in case anyone remembers my other cat drama, Sassy my awesome cat is doing much better. She was diagnosed with vestibular disease related to hyperthyroidism and has made tons of progress. This is my other cat...

MrsT0514

Glad to hear sassy is doing better! Sorry about your dickhead cat's vengeful peeing. I also have a cat that enjoys being a douchecanoe by pooping in our bathtub if, god forbid, there is one turd in the box. (luckily in the guest bathroom that is rarely used, but still...WTF). The kicker is that he's our only cat, sohe's only one shitting in the box.

minervacullen

I had a car that did that, then he started vengeful piping in DSs toys when he was a baby/toddler. I banned him to basement. I got so sick of sanitizing toys every fucking morning and shampooing the carpet by the toy box daily.

He's passed now, but man was he a little shit. I swear he used to say no to me.

NarwhalBacon

Cats are assholes. We also have a cat that vengeful pisses. I don't really have any advice, we just try not to piss her off. 

BugBugandthree

Oh I feel for you. If I didn't have kids, I'd be a crazy cat lady and just live with them. I haven't had a vengeful peeing, yet. I had a dog as a kid who was a vengeful pee-er. But it was more of a I'm about to get in trouble so I'll go pee and make it worse. Maybe a pet whisperer? The dude on tv fixes all sorts of crazy pet problems.

msdrdg

Our cat is a vengeful pooper.  He likes to take a shit on the clothes DH leaves lying around the house.  You would think after years of this DH would learn to pick up after himself, but nooooo, just yell at the cat.  He also likes to just wander around the house meowing at the top of his annoying kitty lungs.  He's lucky he's cute and I'm a "good" person or I would feed him to the foster dog.

SuperTreesa

Yup. I have a vengeful peeing cat too. She was an indoor only cat but just stopped using the cat litter boxes at 5 yrs old. The final straw was when she decided a corner in the nursery was her new spot. After many vet visits and extra litter boxes I decided to try to make her an indoor/outdoor kitty.

It was like a light switch. As long as she gets to go out a few times a day, she is back to being my sweet kitty. I swore I would never have an outdoor kitty but it was seriously either that or attempting rehoming.

MrsT0514

@SuperTreesa‌ that was our solution too. As long as our cat goes outside during the day, his attitude has improved greatly.

sister13

Oh no!  It could be worse:

Cat Traps Family in Bedroom until Police Arrive

NarwhalBacon

NellyBluth said:

NarwhalBacon said:

Cats are assholes. We also have a cat that vengeful pisses. I don't really have any advice, we just try not to piss her off. 

lol. This is why I will never have a cat.

It's basically like dealing with a toddler for 12-19 years. I have to appease my cat so she doesn't throw a kitty tantrum

cyprissa

Ok, so I knew cats were assholes but seriously, I thought the vengeful pissing thing was just my cat. Sorry others have to deal with vengeful pooping and pissing. It kinda makes me feel better. If I thought letting him outside would help, I would consider it but he's a major pussy. The last time he got out accidentally he just meowed at the back door to get back in. Ugh. And seriously...NO ONE else will want this cat, even a hard core crazy cat lady. He is that mean. Maybe I should try to get on the show My Cat From Hell?

JGY

Thank god our cat doesn't do the vengeful peeing, but he does do some serious protest pooping. 

 We know how "Bad" we've been based on where he poops.  Mildly pissed off?  Poop in the laundry at the bottom of the basement stairs.  Seriously annoyed with us?  Poop in the kitchen.  Left him (with catsitter) at home while we visited family for the weekend?  Poop in dining room under chairs.

And he is an only cat, with 3 (THREE) litter boxes all to himself.

Asshole.

justtoday

Lurker here- but familiar with cat issues  : )  One of our cats kept peeing on our couch (every couple of days- so frustrating) for no health related reason. The vet actually prescribed an anti-anxiety pill. So- we gave her a pill every day, and she stopped. She was on the pills for about a year, and then we weaned her off to see how she would do and she hasn't peed anywhere but the box since! She's been pill free for 6 months probably. I know there are different thoughts on medication like that, but it was a sanity/furniture saver.

Weljadraak

Call Jackson Galaxy, the pussy doctor.

wesleycrusher

justtoday said:

Lurker here- but familiar with cat issues  : )  One of our cats kept peeing on our couch (every couple of days- so frustrating) for no health related reason. The vet actually prescribed an anti-anxiety pill. So- we gave her a pill every day, and she stopped. She was on the pills for about a year, and then we weaned her off to see how she would do and she hasn't peed anywhere but the box since! She's been pill free for 6 months probably. I know there are different thoughts on medication like that, but it was a sanity/furniture saver.

I have friends who had a cat pheromone air freshener and it helped to get the cat to stop peeing on their bed. 

ETA: you can get it online, I think.