Are there "Rules" for middle names?

jlove253

**I posted this on the baby names board, but thought it could make interesting discussion here**

I have always disliked names that are made up, and have been opposed to nicknames as names, but recently started considering a middle name for LO that is made up and nickname-sounding. I honestly didn't realize it was made up until I started searching for it on name databases, (I instantly hung my head in shame). Anyways, all this got me to thinking, what makes for an appropriate middle name? Middle names aren't generally shared without a person revealing it themselves, so it seems less threatening to a child's professional future than a ridiculous first name would. I was just wondering about the opinions of you all. Do the "rules" of baby naming (whatever they may be) change at all for middle names?

Obviously one considers the flow of the two names, and not making oneself and baby look foolish with a SUPER you-neek or inappropriate name, but what else should one consider, when it comes to a middle name?

runningmama14

The only thing I can think of would be not giving a very feminine mn to a boy. I know a few guys who guard their mn like a national secret to avoid embarrassment.

Maelara

Middle names are free game! Lots of ladies on the name board don't like more than one middle name. I think that's it for rules though. I totes broke that rule with N

Melissa2216

I like to consider different combinations of initials (first-middle, first-last, and all 3) to make sure they don't spell out something inappropriate.

For us, we've decided against using any B name for the first name. Middle name will be James and last name starts with M. 

So B.M. isn't ideal, but B.J. is no good either. So all B first names are out.

jlove253

runningmama14 said:

The only thing I can think of would be not giving a very feminine mn to a boy. I know a few guys who guard their mn like a national secret to avoid embarrassment.

My grandpa went by his middle name because he thought his first name sounded too feminine. Now I really want to use his first name for our little girl on the way.

And @Maelara‌- my brother has two middle names because my parents couldn't agree. I really like his full name, but the poor kid had a hard time spelling his first name (Jesse), try adding two more middle names and a last name into that! Ha!

jlove253

Melissa2216 said:

I like to consider different combinations of initials (first-middle, first-last, and all 3) to make sure they don't spell out something inappropriate.

For us, we've decided against using any B name for the first name. Middle name will be James and last name starts with M. 

So B.M. isn't ideal, but B.J. is no good either. So all B first names are out.

I'd forgotten about initials. Great point. I had a friend growing up whose initials were KKK and mine were JEW. We always found it a little ironic.

Dimples0101

I agree that there are no rules for MN.  Personally, I have known for years what my children's MN would be because they are family names.  My MN can technically be a name, but it's more of an emotion and I was always embarrassed of it growing up, but now I love it.

mexinugget

I'm a double middle namer. My son has two middle names and this baby will too. I don't really think there are "rules" when naming your kid. Maybe things that are more normal or unusual, def things to take into consideration. It's your kid though : )

smboswell1

In my opinion, it doesn't matter! I have history behind my middle name, but it's not like other people besides my family know that! I don't see why a middle name has to have meaning. If you like the name, it shouldn't matter:)

momtojad

My child technically has about 100 "middle names" but not all of them go on paper.  We don't get to pick, it is jsut all the men before him in the family.

Maelara

mexinugget said:

I'm a double middle namer. My son has two middle names and this baby will too. I don't really think there are "rules" when naming your kid. Maybe things that are more normal or unusual, def things to take into consideration. It's your kid though : )

I'm a double middle namer too so is DD. All important family names. We didnt known if we would have another girl so we tried to get it all in there, lol! This new baby will only have one middle name though

mamaluzi

I had a ex bf who's whole family had crazy Icelandic names. They were beautiful, but the thing is, they all had like 10 names and there were 7 of them total. For example, they would have a semi-ethnic 1st name, like Yohan, but then they would have a REALLY ethnic middle name, then they would have an Icelandic traditional name where they took their dad's name and added either "sson" or "sdottir" to the end (like if Dad's name was Edvard, the 2nd middle name would be Edvardsson or Edvardsdottir depending on their gender)...in Iceland, it would end there, but since his Icelandic dad married an American, they also had his last name as their Icelandic-Americanized official last name (so, their Dad's last name but was HIS version of HIS father's name with "sson" at the end). So, in the end, if Dad is Edvard and Grandpa over in Iceland was Christian, they all had names like Yohan Ásgrímur Edvardsson Christiansson or, for the ladies, Abagael Árlaug Edvardssdottir Christiansson. PHEW! It was a mouthful. My ex went by a made-up nickname something like "Bubs" anyway so it just added to the confusion!

So yeah, simple is good.

Dana633

In my family and in my community, people gave their children "saint" names as middle names.  I was always taught that the purpose of a middle name was to give the child a saint name as their baptismal name.

My uncle has 2 middle names, because my grandmother wanted to give him her deceased father's name as a MN but it wasn't a saint name so for him to be baptized she had to give him a saint name as well.

That's why a lot of older people have middle names such as...Matthew, John, Paul, Luke and such.

mamaluzi

Dana633 said:

In my family and in my community, people gave their children "saint" names as middle names.  I was always taught that the purpose of a middle name was to give the child a saint name as their baptismal name.

My uncle has 2 middle names, because my grandmother wanted to give him her deceased father's name as a MN but it wasn't a saint name so for him to be baptized she had to give him a saint name as well.

That's why a lot of older people have middle names such as...Matthew, John, Paul, Luke and such.

I'm Catholic and I've heard of this, too. I have one middle name, but when I was confirmed as a teenager I was instructed to pick a Saint name, as well, to go after my middle name. It's not official or on my birth cert or anything, but technically my Catholic name includes 2 middle names.

Curlyfries851

I recently had this convo with a friend and we both agreed that middle names are always older uncool names lol. My middle name is Lorraine and hers is Florence lol. We started talking about it because I was saying that my husband is trying to veto my middle name selection which would be my grandfathers (agreeably uncool) name. I want to name LO jack chesley.

PandaCon

In my family we typically use MN to honor someone.  For example. my son's middle name is DH's dad's name (who passed when DH was 18). We also considered giving him DH's name as a middle name too. 

If we have a girl, we will probably use the middle name Ann after my mom.

Check initials.  I always told myself that I wouldn't marry a man with the last name of C because my initials are AB.  Guess what?! I am now ABC!  Not a big deal now that I am an adult because you don't use your full initials very often!

phdprocrastinator

I agree with PP that our main consideration was whether the initials would be embarrassing.  I have two middle names (a middle name and my mom's maiden name).  I like the idea of having my mom's maiden name in my name, but my last name is three syllables (mom's was only one) and DH's is two syllables.  Plus no one can spell either last name.  So we aren't following that tradition.

I know a woman who got pregnant out of wedlock.  She and the father weren't on the best of terms, which made determining the name awkward.  The father liked really, really weird names.  Then there was the whole "whose last name should we choose" issue.  So I think she ended up giving her DD 5 names.  A normal-ish first and second, a strange third, then both last names.  At least the baby has a lot to work with as she gets older

shindylahoe

I wanna hear the middle name you like!

meeshybee

I don't think there's any cultural rules about middle names, really. My family's tradition is to use a family name (someone's first or middle name) as the child's middle name, but we may have to break that with this one because none of the family names we can choose sound good with the first name we've picked. My family won't be happy, but too bad. It's my kid.

ssstephanie214

I know a girl whose middle name is Pennylane. In my opinion it is adorable and makes her really cool.

A friend from high school and all of her siblings have her mom's maiden name as their middle name and that seems strange.

When I told my mom our baby's name, she said that in the Jewish faith you don't name a baby after someone who's still alive. Well balls on you mom, it happens to be a name (elizabeth) common to both of our families and traces back many generations.