Possible triplets: tell me everything you know about being a MoM

danichyl · July 2014

As some of you may know, I did IVF with two embryos. Both implanted but one split so I am currently pregnant with triplets. We've begun the SR discussions and started making appointments with MFMs, etc. Everything I hear about the risks of carrying triplets (particularly the chance of losing all three babies) has me leaning towards going through with the procedure. But I am waiting to make my final call until 1. I confirm that one of the twins hasn't vanished yet and 2. I meet with the perinatologist. So, if I decide to keep all three, give me the scoop:

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big?

2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns?

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere?

4. Were you worried about pre term labor?

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties?

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest?

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)?

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky?

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind?

Thank you.

danichyl · July 2014

10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU?

11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time?

rcnavywife · July 2014

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big?
Yes, I was honestly worried about what would happen to my body in general. I had diastasis recti with my singleton. But by the time I delivered at 27 weeks I was roughly the size I wad at delivery with my singleton. Ended up being a non-issue.
2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns?
Yup. It's stressful. But we have been so fortunate with help from our families and both my DH and I are home full time for the next few months (again, very fortunate to have that option). There have been several times (especially at night in the newborn stage) that I just cried with them.
3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere?
This kept me up at night during my pregnancy. I have yet to venture out on my own with more than two.
4. Were you worried about pre term labor?
Oddly enough, not really. Because I assumed it would happen, so I let it go.
5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties?
Not really until they were born so early. I knew the risks but again, I was able to let it go until they were born.
6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest?
I was placed on MBR at 12/13 weeks, so I didn't have much time to worry ahead of time. Lots of help from family. Plus, I'm in Canada, so I had insurance benefits to claim for being out of work for a medical reason, having critically ill babies in the hospital, and then mat leave.
7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)?
The budget will be tight until I go back to work. I'm more worried about keeping my practice hours up so I don't lose my professional license.
8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky?
It has taken some getting used to, the attention multiples draw. We try to refer to them by name, not as "the triplets". We don't dress them alike, etc.
9. Anything else I need to keep in mind?
If you move forward with multiples, say yes to any offers of help. If people say "let me know what I can do!", tell them! Bring a meal, etc. Friends understand that if they come visit, odds are they will be handed a baby to hold and/or feed at some point!
10. Bonding - this was difficult for me with them being in the NICU so long. I kept comparing things to my first pregnancy and relationship with my older DS. But it has gotten better since they've come home.
11. This is not natural - this did cross my mind, especially during my pregnancy. The aches and pains I had in third tri with my son came so much earlier. I literally had to nap every afternoon to function. I felt like a house so early. But I tried my best to keep my spirits up and joke about things. My DH was wonderfully supportive.

lc&jw · July 2014

Twin mom here, but it's still a multiples perspective:

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big?

Yes, but in the end, it's amazing what your body can accommodate. Early on, some of the pictures I saw of people at the end of multiple pregnancies kind of shocked and terrified me, if I'm being perfectly honest. I did end up huge in the end, but it happens gradually so you have time to adjust. People definitely stared at me everywhere I went in my last trimester and I was very uncomfortable with the attention. My body has rebounded pretty well at 17 months postpartum. There's some loose skin that I'll probably always have, but surprisingly no stretch marks.

2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns?

Somewhat worried about 2 crying newborns. I'll be honest, it's a huge challenge at times, although I had one baby with colic. I recommend having help available for the first 3-4 months. We didn't have any family here so we hired someone to come be an extra set of hands for me during the day once my husband went back to work. It really stretched our budget but we also knew that it saved our sanity and was only temporary. I couldn't do it on my own, especially not with a colickly baby.Things changed dramatically once the babies go to be about 4 months old.

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere?

Yes, but I've discovered you just have to be brave and do it. I'm amazed at the challenges I can take on now. It's actually very empowering. You will feel like a badass mama when you get multiple babies out of the house by yourself. When the time comes, this board is tremendously helpful with tips about how to make outings manageable. Going out with the kids regularly helped keep me sane.

4. Were you worried about pre term labor?

Mildly worried when I found out we were expecting twins, but I decided not to worry about it until it became a problem. In the end, it was never really an issue. Minor worries around 32 weeks, but I just backed off on my activity level for a few weeks. In the end, I carried until 39w5d and labor had to be induced.

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties?

Not really. Minor worries if I had a vaginal birth, but that wasn't meant to be in the end.

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest?

I worried about it slightly when we found out we were having twins, but then I just focused on having the healthiest pregnancy I could. No bed rest was ever needed.

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)?

Again, minor worries at first when everything was very abstract in the beginning, but it was never an issue.

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky?

I did worry about my twins not having their own identities, so I've been very mindful of helping people see them as the wonderful little individuals they are. I never refer to them as "the twins", and always use both names instead. Those around me have generally followed my lead. My kids don't have rhyming or similar names (though the names work well together), and I don't dress them alike.

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind?

Being a MoM is challenging at times, but also amazingly rewarding. Things get much easier after the first year. I was pretty scared when I found out we were expecting twins (we thought we'd be insanely lucky if we ever conceived and carried even 1 baby to term), but I wouldn't trade this experience for anything. When I watch my kids hug each other and laugh together, or have 2 babies run to me when I walk in the door, it makes all the hard moments worth it.

10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU?

I did worry about this. We didn't have any NICU time and I was never separated from my babies after my c-section (but I was pretty out of it due to anesthesia issues). I did have some issues bonding with one of my babies at first (more due to complicated feeding issues). When I realized several months in that the bond felt different, I put a lot more effort into spending time with that baby and developing the connection. It made a huge difference and both babies now have a strong and healthy bond with both myself and DH.

11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time?

Sort of, except that plenty of women conceive multiples naturally and go on to deliver them without incident. Any pregnancy can be complicated, even singletons.

LALASEPT05 · July 2014

It's too bad Peakay doesn't visit this board as much anymore since her boys are 6. She has triplet boys and is really a great resource I think. At least I thought she was and I had twins. Her blog is www.pyjammy.com and maybe worth a read for you or at least searching through some of her old posts to get a feel for how it was with triplets. Thinking of you - I know its a very difficult thing you're faced with and only you can make the judgement as to what is best for you and your family.

shaunah816 · July 2014

I keep hoping @pea-kay will wander by and comment, because she has a great perspective with her identical triplets! Maybe tagging her will help

danichyl · July 2014

Checking out Peakay's blog right now.

Courtneyw04 · July 2014

https://www.facebook.com/groups/33387584190/?ref=ts&fref=ts

Courtneyw04 · July 2014

The best place to chat and find more info is a Facebook group specifically for triplets.

danichyl · July 2014

Thanks @Courtneyw04 Do you happen to know if joining the Facebook group is private? I don't want all my friends to know yet.

Rynleigh · July 2014

It's closed rather than private, which means that people probably won't see you join, but they might get the group "suggested" to them in the sidebar, which would show them that you are a member.

mommaoftrips · July 2014

I will comment tonight have just been busy. Sorry. I have 2 identical and a fraternal triplets.

frank3jr · July 2014

I am a twin mom but here is mine:

1. It actually never seemed like my belly was that big to me. Randoms told me it was and when I look at pictures it looks like it was but to me it always seemed like it wasn't too bad and there was always more room. I was very happy when flip flop weather came, even though I decided it was in March in Michigan because I really couldn't put on boots anymore after a while.

2. I was worried about them crying at the same time but actually it was pretty rare where I was alone where they both had meltdowns. When it did happen, that is when we went for a ride in the car or stroller and it always worked. Rides always make them stop at some point. Swings also did wonders for this.

3. We weren't worried about this because it always just was in our mind that we had to get both kids. It didn't take long when we found out about the twins that now it's hard to even think of things without 2 kids right away. We knew we had to get a great stroller and we did and I still firmly believe it is the most important purchase. They didn't have good double strollers in stores really so it took more research but when getting that stroller, I really felt like I could conquer the world and I didn't ever have anywhere I didn't feel like I could go but the stroller did go everywhere with us to make that possible.

4. I wasn't too worried about preterm labor since the women in my family tend to go past due dates always and I guess it didn't cross my mind too much. I knew it was always a possibility but with lots of doctors visits, they were able to always keep a good watch because especially near the end, the doctor's office became like a second home cause I was there so much.

5. I knew this again was a possibility but I didn't think about it too much and decided we'd adjust how we needed to. My twins actually started out great and have been ahead on rolling over, walking, words, etc compared to single babies.

6. I was a little worried about bedrest and for some reason I really wanted to prove that just because I was carrying twins I wasn't necessarily going to be on bedrest. I did end up getting preeclampsia and was put on bedrest a week before being induced and it wasn't bad. I have known a lot of people that were put on bedrest when they were pregnant with one baby too.

7. We are always a little worried about finances 14 months later and have always worried about finances before we had kids. We always know we will make it though one way or another. The great thing about having mulitiples is that people really want to help you out, especially other parents of mulitiples. So many people have reached out to us to let us have or borrow things and you really don't need 2 of everything. Our family and friends have been very generous and you can get stuff at mom-to-mom sales, garage sales, etc. I never turn anything down. Even if I find I don't use it, I always take what's offered first and figure out if we do want to use it later.

8.I wasn't really worried about this because I knew my husband and I would always make them feel individual and special and that's what mattered. Being a mulitiple is unique and special and amazes people. It's a miracle I get to see everyday and I love that. We really try and focus on the positives of having twins verses the negatives. My twins are boy/girl so it ended up not being much of an issue really. I will say, ever sense they turned about 8/9 months, they really have been best friends and things have gotten a lot easier because they entertain each other and make each other laugh. They always want to be together and instead of us always trying to keep them entertained they really do that for each other and there is nothing better to watch.

9. You will be amazed what you are capable of doing. When I first found out we were having twins, I swore that my husband had set up it as a joke and even though I didn't know how he get the ultrasound tec and everyone on board, I was very convinced and in shock. I started connecting with twin parents because they became the best ones and still are the best ones to talk to because they support you in a different way than others can. Looking back we can't remember much from the first few months but it's also been a lot of fun and I'm so happy I've gotten to experience something so special with twins. It has it's hard times, but with a supportive husband who is completely hands on and both of us working equally as hard and doing things equally with the kids, it's been memorable and fun to do it together. I know a lot of moms seem to take on more responsibilities when they have one baby but with us and never having that as an option with the twins, my husband has gotten a chance to bond with the babies just as much as I have and I love how close he is with them. I feel like there is nothing that can make us more of a team than the twin experience. Also, family and friends loving helping out more than if we had one baby and I'd probably be handling things a lot more. It makes them feel special and helps them make special bonds as well. I remember when we were in the hospital and we were worried about weight loss with the babies and my son had breathing problems, etc and the nurses kept saying in a month this is going to be old news and they will be chunky babies and you won't have any worries anymore. From your post it really sounds like you are really worried about the pregnancy and newborn phase which is definietly huge things to think about and worry about but if you think about the amount of time you are pregnant and the babies are newborns compared to the later years, it's short term and difficult but if you think about all the years to come with the mulitiples, it's only just the beginning. With your situation, I would think about what you will regret more. That's how I often make tough decisions.

frank3jr · July 2014

Sorry forgot to remind the other 2:

10. I was probably the most worried about this, especially after they were born and my son was in the nursery while my daughter was in the room with me but it was a again, it really gave my husband the opportunity to bond with the babies so much because we were both trying to make sure both babies got attention and I love that he has this. He loves talking about his bonding stories when they kids were born and newborn and I don't know if he would have gotten so much of this with one baby. Hearing him tell these stories over and over still brings the biggest smile to my face. There was many newborn days where my daughter was so content and never seemed to cry about anything (we actually asked the doctor cause we were so worried) and our son seemed to need attention all the time and I felt so bad but people reminded me that it would be similar to this if we had one baby and they already had siblings and that was always helpful. You will bond with them no matter what because they already have a bond with you. My daughter was screaming her head off after she was born (csections) and when they brought her to me, she stopped crying immediately so I know we were already bonded from the start and you will be too

11. It never seemed not natural it was just hard to believe I was a twin mom in the beginning and then after a few months it was hard to think of anything but having twins. It was so cool that I could feel the different babies and know who was doing what when they were moving around. I loved the excitement and miracle of it all and I loved that I could share that with everyone, even those odd strangers. Sometimes it makes me feel like I"m in a parade in the grocery store when I'm strolling the kids down an aisle and people just stop and one say, "oh twins" and they just stop and stare but I am excited that they can witness something so cool.

Courtneyw04 · July 2014

To be honest, I worried about every question constantly. I was scared to death and would burst out in tears the first couple of weeks. It was a very scary time for my husband and I. 1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? Yes. I was unsure if my body could even handle a quad pregnancy. 2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns?Yes, I was worried about not getting enough sleep and being able to even handle the craziness. 3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere? Yep, but you soon figure out what works best and give yourself lots of extra time. 4. Were you worried about pre term labor? Yes, a quad pregnancy on average delivers at 28 weeks. But with modern medicine and technological advances many miracles are born every day. My kids were born at 25 weeks and have all been doing pretty amazing. 5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? Yep, but you soon realize that there are TONS of resources for kids with delays and therapists working to catch your kids up. My kids are almost caught up, except for speech delays. 6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest? Yes, but if was ok with that. Whatever helped the babies cook longer I was going to do. 7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)? If need be, there are resources out there to help families. 8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky? Most people do a great job with recognizing them as individuals. I haven't seen much of a problem so far. 9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? Everything works out.

mommaoftrips · July 2014

Honestly, I wasn't worried about any of this things you're asking about but here are my answers.
1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? Nope, first pregnancy and just figured my body would adapt.
2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns? Not really - we were going to have to make do as there were only two of us and three babies. I did have my mom stay for the first 2 months and after that I hired a person to come in for 4 hours in the mornings so I could sleep (I did the night shift).

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere? nope, we bought the right strollers, made decisions about how we wanted to transport. ie. vehicle (Yukon XL), double stroller (City select) with an infant carrier. triple strollers are heavy, either two wide or too long and we didn't want to look like a circus show. our LOs were born in the winter so we didn't go many places.

4. Were you worried about pre term labor? I totally felt like everything in with the pregnancy would be fine. BUT I did have PTL at 23weeks. it was totally scary.

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? Nope, same as answer above.

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest? Nope but I did end-up being on bedrest for 7 weeks and it was fine. I just put it into my head that I was taking it one day at a time and it was for the babies. It sure didn't feel like 7 weeks.

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)? I am in Canada - so not sure if things are different but this wasn't a concern because I was covered. I do work fulltime.

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky? well, I cant answer this really because I am a twin and feel like an individual so I didn't worry about this.

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? not that I can think of.

Thank you.

10. I didn't worry about the bonding, knew I would do the best I could do.

11. no - but people definitely think that triplets are all 'helped' and can't be natural. That bugs me.

1+tripsmom · July 2014

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? Yes and no I am only 5ft2in so I worried about how I could Carry them but just wanted to get big enough to carry them. 2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns? Yes I spend more time with my husband gone then around so I worried how I would do it. But I did just fine. Even 100% on my own 3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere? Nope we did a double snap and go and wore a baby when small then got a triple stroller. I have never been one who stayed home nor could I with my older son. 4. Were you worried about pre term labor? Of course but I carried my triplets longer then my singleton 5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? Of course and Baby A has mild CP and Autism but my DS1 also has autism so. 6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest? Yes but knew we would figure something out. 7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)? I was not working before they were born. You always find a way to deal with the money you cut in other places. 8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky? No they are individuals and no one thinks they are not. Yes we are freaks cause have triplets but get used to it. 9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? 10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU? No you don't have to bond with in a set amount of time. It was hard when some in hospital but you figure it out. 11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time? No once we found out all I could think of was I want my babies. If I was not ment to have them I would not.

KDR1979 · July 2014

I'm just a twin mom too, but I'll also chime in!

I have a friend that got pregnant after missing a few birth control pills...spontaneous triplets!! Her doctor also discussed SR, but she decided to take her chances on the 3. She got sick with pre-eclampsia/Hellp syndrome and had a c/s at 27 weeks. The 3 babies weighed around 2lbs each and spend 2-3 months in the Nicu. They are now 1 and doing pretty well. They are delayed, but are expected to catch up by the age of 3. She has always had a live in nanny to help her and she quit her job for the first year.

I have so many IVF friends and have 3 other friends with twins. 1 was a first time mom and made it to 37 weeks. The other 2 had singletons prior to their twins and made it to 36 and 38 weeks. A girl from my high school had triplets after and IUI and actually made it to 37 weeks and they each weighed 6lbs! Her one child had a diaphragmatic hernia, but is doing well.

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? No. I trusted my body to do what it needed to do. After 32 weeks, I was pretty large and uncomfortable but I knew every day of growing babies meant healthier babies. I made it to 36 weeks & they weighed 5lbs and 6lbs 9oz.

2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns? I DID worry about this, and I only had two to juggle. There were definitely rough days where I cried right alongside them because I felt so overwhelmed. DH is an Attorney and only had 1 week off work, so I was by myself trying to care/pump/nurse 2 babies by the time they were ~8-9 days old. My mom did come over about 2x/week to help. If I could go back, I would have interviewed mother's helpers/night nurses while pregnant to have more help when they arrived!

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere? I DID worry about this. It's still difficult, even with two. I had a double snap and go for the first year and that was a life saver. The infant car seats just clicked into it. You could wear one baby and use a double snap and go if the triplet strollers aren't as light and portable. Around 1, we started using a baby jogger city mini and that is also a life saver. A good stroller is SO important with multiples.

4. Were you worried about pre term labor? Yes. Since they were fertility babies, I ALWAYS worried that they could be taken away at any moment. I always counted down to milestones. 12 weeks then 24, 28, 32, 34 and 36 weeks. I spent most of my pregnancy trying to keep them inside and healthy that I wasn't prepared for life with 2 newborns!

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? I worried a little, but worried most about getting them through the pregnancy.

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest? Not really. My OB told me at 24 weeks to expect bedrest at 24 weeks just because. She knew how hard we had worked for them and wanted to be very conservative. I worked full time until 26 weeks, part time for 3.5 weeks until I was put on bedrest at 29.5 weeks for growth discordance. DD was 20-25th percentile and DS was 75th percentile. I delivered at 36 weeks.

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)? No, but we had a nice savings account while I was pregnant that gave us a cushion. DH also has a great job and is the breadwinner.

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky? Again, "just" twins, but I didn't worry about this. Lots of people come up and ask about them-especially in the first year. But, most people were just curious and wanted to see cute babies.

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? You'll be fine! You can do this. The Bump was a great resource for me and my other friends that had babies before me.

10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU? We didn't have NICU time, thankfully. I worried a little about giving them equal attention and snuggles in the beginning. I do think having multiples limits "enjoying" the newborn phase ...but I don't think parents of singletons would say that is an enjoyable time either. My SIL rocked both of her girls to sleep for years (they are 4 years apart) and she loved doing that. It's impossible to do things like that when you have multiples.

11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time? Never crossed my mind. My thoughts were more along the lines of "If God didn't want me to have twins, I wouldn't be having twins." I felt like this too. We did 5 IVF's to get our babies and felt like God was in control...we couldn't make IVF work...it was still up to Him.

Bigboneded · July 2014

I am FTM so I can't answer how things turned out yet :-) I had a loss last year, it took a year to get pg with the twins. But I want to share that in 1950 my grandmother had a 3yo and a 1 yr old and gave birth to triplets (fraternal twins with a split, like yours) She was a SAHM and had some help from family.... but was a lot on her own. It can be done. All in all there were 10 kids in my dad's family, and I am so glad for all of them. The triplets are 64 now, we just had another birthday party for them and they are the most amazing and unique people- and share a special bond together that is their own :-) SR wasnt a choice in 1950, and my family is Catholic, so it wouldnt have been a route they would choose. I completely understand the fear of losing all 3, but I am afraid of amniocentesis and CVS b/c of increased risk of m/c.... I would be more scared of SR. Very difficult place to be, I hope you find your answers soon and get to enjoy an uneventful h&h pregnancy!
And I am glad you have this place as a resource :-)

pea-kay · July 2014

Ooops, here I am!

My ears were burning.

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? Sort of, but not really. As my OB so kindly pointed out, I was "built for carrying triplets." Hmm.

2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns? To be honest, I didn't worry about things like that. I just focused on getting through pregnancy. But we did handle it. And it was hard, but it was doable. Honestly, it was rare that all three cried at once. Every time I tried to get video proof, one of them would stop.

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere? Not really. I knew we'd get a minivan and a triple stroller. And trust me, 7 years ago there were a lot fewer triple and double strollers available. In the end, we had about 8 at once.

4. Were you worried about pre term labor? Not really. I was more worried that we had a momo set (we didn't find all of the dividing membranes until 22ish weeks.)

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? Not really. Like I said, I just concentrated on getting through the pregnancy.

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest? I just took it day by day and while I do wish I'd taken it easier (I never had preterm labor, not a single contraction, but I did develop pre-e, and I wonder if I'd been less active if I could have staved it off? But that might be naive) I wasn't really worried about bed rest. Near the end, I welcomed it.

(But I was only on it for less than two weeks.)

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)? No. I always knew I would go back to work.

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky? Sure, I still am, but I'm raising them to be individuals. You and your husband can take the lead on how they perceive themselves and how others perceive them, but it's something we constantly fight. I think it's a bigger issue for me because they're all identical. I cringe when people ask them, "which one are you?"

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? As an attention whore, it's the best thing ever.

And honestly, I feel sorry for my friends who had their three kids one at a time. WAY more work that way.

pea-kay · July 2014

Ooops, missed these:

10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU? Honestly, I didn't bond with them until they came home (at about 2 weeks old) and I was worried because when they were in the NICU, they didn't feel like "mine." But within a few weeks or months (it's all a blur), we totally bonded.

11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time? Uh. I disagree with that.

Kissimi21 · July 2014

I am a mom of twins that started out as spontaneous triplets. I found out Baby C passed at 10 weeks. While I never had to worry about 3 crying newborns, I have often wondered what life would be like if Baby C had survived.

1.Were you worried about your belly getting so big? Not really. Every pregnancy (single, twin or more)will make your belly big.

2. Were you worried you just couldn't handle three crying newborns? Definitely, but I was worried about handling 1 screaming newborn with my singleton.

3. Were you worried about how you would transport three babies everywhere?No, but DH was freaked out over having to buy a mini van. (We had just bought a new car just months before my BFP.)

4. Were you worried about pre term labor?Yes, but was well cared for and reassured by my doctor. FTR, I had to be induced.

5. Were you worried about developmental difficulties? Yes, but it never happened.

6. Were you worried about being confined to bed rest?Yes, but it never happened.

7. Were you worried about not being able to work and earn money (that you would really need for extra babies)?Yes, a bit but we were fine.

8. Were you worried about the triplets not being seen as individuals but as a set or even as a little freaky?The same could be said about twins. I make sure to dress my boys differently and stress that Ben is Ben and Sam is Sam, and they are not just "the twins".

9. Anything else I need to keep in mind? You will survive. That was the advice given to me from a MoM of twenty year old twins.

10. Did you worry you wouldn't be able to bond with any of them because you would be so busy/tired/recovering/separated by NICU? Bonding happens at different times for everyone. Some singleton moms worry about not bonding until their babies are 6 months old.

11. Did you worry: This is just not natural. Women are meant to have one baby at a time? I actually find that question offensive. If it wasn't natural to have multiples, they wouldn't happen.

HeavenBlessedMom · July 2014

h soave you been pregnant before? IF so, maybe you will not be huge. I delivered just before 30 weeks 41 weeks with a single baby. And I started at a size 0. I was in the hospital with preterm at 26 weeks and remain there for 10 days on modified bed rest. Eventually delivered at 29 weeks 5 days. They were in nicu between six and eight weeks and really never had any setbacks. They were three pounds 6 ounces 3 pounds 7 ounces in 3 pounds 9 ounces. They are 18 weeks today in between 13 and a half and 15 pounds.my daughter was 16 months old when they were born so this was the biggest challenge and remains the biggest challenge. We considered selective reduction but never really thought to go through with it and less there was a genetic problem.did a test at 11 weeks and everything looked good so we continued. It was one of the best decisions.

HeavenBlessedMom · July 2014

that was supposed to say I delivered just before 30 weeks and measured 41 weeks with a singleton the day the triplets were born

danichyl · July 2014

@HeavenBlessedMom I have never been pregnant before. Starting at a size 2. Are any of your sons identical?

HeavenBlessedMom · July 2014

Just thought a prior pregnancy may be an indicator. With my first daughter, didn't know I was pregnant until after 20 weeks. More like 24 to 26. And I only went 36. No, none of the boys are identical.