DD doesn't want to go back to school — The Bump
School-Aged Children

DD doesn't want to go back to school

DD is already saying that she doesn't want to go back to school in mid August.  We had trouble getting her to go to kindergarten this past year.  There were several days when I had to walk her to class, one day when she just refused to get out of bed and was tardy and two days where she had to be carried down the hall by teachers, kicking, screaming and crying.  When I ask why she doesn't want to go back to school, she says she doesn't want to sit and learn all day.  She is great at classwork, got advanced in 98% of her 'subjects'.  I pointed out if she doesn't go back to school she won't see her friends anymore and she doesn't care.  I don't want her to be miserable all the time and I don't want fights every morning once school starts.  She is a very moody child so I'm not sure that we would both do well with homeschooling.  Any suggestions?
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Re: DD doesn't want to go back to school

  • Time is your friend with this, and it will get better.  It's not abnormal for kids her age to still deal with some separation anxiety, even in kindergarten.  Honestly, unless there's something that makes you very uncomfortable about her school, I would take her summer grumbling with a grain of salt.  Try not to engage her in conversation about school. 2 months in the life of a 6 year old is a long time, and she could mature and be more ready to face school again by then.

    When the actual start of school draws near in August, stay focused on the positive.  Find one thing she really liked about school (the teacher always has books to read, art, gym, recess, lunch in the cafeteria, playing with a friend, whatever) and stay focused on this thing.  Get her pumped up with new school supplies, shoes, meeting the teacher, etc.  Don't let her manipulate the conversation with her moody/grumpy reactions to the idea of school.  It's non-negotiable -- she has to go.  She may sense that you feel "sorry" for her, and that's making her ramp it up in hopes that she'll get her way.

    One other thought: she's probably young for her grade, having just turned 6 at the end of K.  It might not be unusual for her to be a little behind on emotional and social things, compared to her classmates.  My daughter is one of the youngest in her grade, and she was mature in some ways, but struggled in some other areas compared to her peers.   It took her until about the end of first grade to be socially/emotionally on par with her classmates.  After that -- no problems!
    High School English teacher and mom of 2 kids:

    DD, born 9/06/00 -- 12th grade
    DS, born 8/25/04 -- 7th grade
  • Yes, I would try and find out more. Maybe she didnt like the teacher or the kids?  My daughter also didnt like to sit still and learn all day, but still liked school and never had issues with it. So I would say that something else is going on for sure.
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