Naming children after their moms - thoughts?

SusieBW

Why is it so commonplace for boys to be named after their dads, and for that to go on for generations, but never for girls to be named after their moms?  Is it because with women changing their names for marriage, the "legacy" thing isn't there? 

But even just first names - you never see a kid named after their mom anymore, but it used to be pretty common.  I just read an article about the WW2 vet on whose life the book Unbroken was based - his wife's name was Cynthia, and he is survived by his daughter Cynthia.  His name was Louis, named after his mother Louise.  John and Abigail Adams had a daughter named Abigail, two of Thomas Jefferson's daughters were named after his wife.  It usd to be really common, but it seems like it's never done anymore.  Would you think it was weird for someone's daughter to share their mom's name?  Or for a boy to be named after his mom (a la Louis for Louise)?  Would you ever name a daughter (or son) after yourself?

SusieBW

I don't even want my son to share my husband's name because I think it's too confusing, so I would not name a child after myself.  For me, there are so many names out there to chose from, why not come up with something unique and new instead of using someone in the same household.  But I get that some families are into the legacy thing, and I respect that.  It's just not for me.  DH is a Jr. and I'm pretty psyched that he was never into continuing the tradition.

Family names I get, and I like the idea of honoring relatives from older generations or outside of your immediate family.  I just think it gets confusing to have two people with the same name in one household.

BeanNut

We gave one of our daughters my first name as her middle name.  It was a last minute decision after she was born because we hadn't decided on a name.  But I'm glad that we did .

I wouldn't name a boy or girl the same first name as DH or I.  It's really NMS-I think each child should have their own name.  But no I don't think it's weird for a family to do that for a boy or a girl.

SusieBW

starla487 said:

LO's middle name is mine and my mom's. So, we're kind of naming her after me.

The same middle name as you and your mom - or do you and your mom have the same first name and that's going to be LO's middle name?

SusieBW

BeanNut said:

  But no I don't think it's weird for a family to do that for a boy or a girl.

yeah, I don't think it's weird, I just think it's interesting how it seems no happen so rarely anymore, but kids are still named for their dads all the time.

jesslinnn

My mom's cousin is named after her mom. They're both Beverly and both go by Bev. The oldest brother is named after the dad. I think it's strange, but I'm not a fan of juniors anyway, male or female.

TheOtherJacobsons

I am not sure about both names. My MIL and SIL have the same middle name. We're also doing the same with our LO. Though on the other end of that, DH is a Jr and if LO had been a boy, he'd have been a 3rd. I would prefer to not have his name be the same, but honestly, DH's dad has been more of a father to me than any other father figure in my life and I would want to honor him this way. I do not think I would choose to give a girl my full name. Though, there is one lady in my office that is a Jr. She kept the entire name even after she got married. Fuck it, if that's what you want to do, then do it.

jesslinnn

I'm cool with sharing middle names though. I like using family names. This LO will have the middle name Ann, which is my mom and grandma's mn.

bumpuser10309732

I dont know. If we were having a boy, I was going to give him my grandfather's name, also my dad's middle name. It's been passed down in my family for a very long time and it means something to me. I'm a fan of the names that mean something. I want DD to have her "own" name but I also wouldn't mind her sharing a middle name with someone I care about. I probably wouldn't choose my own though. That gets confusing to me.

SusieBW

geetargirl05 said:

I share my MN with my mom, and my brother shares his MN with our dad. I actually have quite a few friends (20-30s) who are Jrs or have some other part of their name from their parents.

Interesting.  What region do you live in, if you don't mind saying?  I wonder if it's a regional thing.

colacrock

A friend of mine is named Sarah and she named her daughter Sarah-May. At first I thought it was a little strange, but then I found out that she and her daughter were both named after a beloved great grandmother. It's still NMS, but I don't find it strange anymore. 

As far as passing on a Jr. name, there are a lot of male names passed on in my family. Even when the name was given to a girl (Shane has a daughter named Shaleen, Joe has a daughter named Jolene). Again, NMS but whatever works for those people. Even a lot of the grand kids have a middle name that is my grandpa's first name when they could just as easily have used my grandma's name. There are virtually no girls named after their moms or grandmothers. 

Both of my boys middle names come from their dad or grandpa. Definitely an interesting topic to think about!

SusieBW

Nicb13 said:

I think it's weird that my friend named her daughter what my friend's maiden name is. I'm sure if she got divorced, she probably wouldn't change her kid's last names but still. Her daughter could possibly have the same first and last name. Spelled exactly the same way.

Isn't that weird?

There's a judge in RI named Jeremiah Jeremiah.  Same first and last name, spelled exactly the same way.  I think it's kind of weird.

There's a possibility in the back of my mind of giving DS my maiden name as a middle name, but it's just an idea, and it would depend on what first name we chose.  It starts with W and I like the middle initial W for some reason.  I know that if I ever got divorced, I wouldn't change my kids last name.  He'd still be their dad, and it seems like it would be a pain to change their names unnecessarily.  All the middle name ideas I have are names with meaning (DH's name, my maiden name, my brother's name, a grandfather's name), but none of the first names I'm considering have meaning, they're just names I like.

AmandaJean12

My moms first name is my middle name. I thought about continuing the trend but Amanda is an awkward middle name. But my mom and DHs mom have the same middle name, so were giving our LO that mn too.

I'd never do first names but I like giving middle names that are handed down.

Emerald27

I grew up with a girl who was named Mary after her mother, but this girl went by the double name "Mary Katherine" to differentiate within the family between her and her mom. Some folks called her MK.

It's uncommon to be named after your mom but wouldn't draw the side-eye from me. I think a more likely reason than "legacy" is that moms a want to be original and enjoy the fun of naming their babies...and using your own name seems less fun.

lrobi13

I guess it depends on the names. My mom hated her name and my first name is the same as my maternal aunt and my stepmom so I would never pass it on.

hermanavelasquez

Hmm... This is a little different in Dominican Republic (or in other hispanic countries) because we don't change our lastname and children have their mother's last name as their second last name (it figures in all documents, etc).  It is still very common here to name daughters after their mothers, but not as common as it used to be, although now is an increasing use of adapting mother's name to a boy and it is still very common to use the grandmother's name. 

Mine is a very unique name and my husband would like it for a daughter, but we have other names in mind.  

Having the same name repeated in one family often leads to confusion and every child is unique, so it should be good to make an effort to give them a name that reminds their individuality, but also giving a parents name is meaningful and keeps traditions. 

lrobi13

I did once have a little girl in one of my swim classes who was T---- Jr. (assuming named after her mom). I am pretty sure I side eyed that name at the time.

lilmissfancy

My MIL and SIL have the same name. We just call my SIL by her NN though. I was thinking about giving my DS a similar MN as mine. My MN is Nicole and I was considering using Cole for his.

MorganWP

I have a cousin who is named after her mom. They share a birthday too. Never thought of it being an odd thing.

DD is kind of named after SO but not on purpose. However I dont think I would name DS after me. And we're not having any more so.

themiss

Fun Fact: In Judaism, you don't name someone after a living family member or relative. So boys don't have their father names, and vice versa. I think it's considered bad luck to be named after someone is alive.

My son will have my grandfather's middle name, but had we had a daughter, she would have had my grandmothers name...both have passed.

pnwlover12

hermanavelasquez said:

Hmm... This is a little different in Dominican Republic (or in other hispanic countries) because we don't change our lastname and children have their mother's last name as their second last name (it figures in all documents, etc).  It is still very common here to name daughters after their mothers, but not as common as it used to be, although now is an increasing use of adapting mother's name to a boy and it is still very common to use the grandmother's name. 

Mine is a very unique name and my husband would like it for a daughter, but we have other names in mind.  

Having the same name repeated in one family often leads to confusion and every child is unique, so it should be good to make an effort to give them a name that reminds their individuality, but also giving a parents name is meaningful and keeps traditions. 

@hermanavelasquez - You are from the Dominican Republic? I'm jealous. Going there is on my bucket list and I think we're going to do it for my 30th birthday. Can I pick your brain someday? I want a local's inside tips!

JessAnnJ

I wouldn't name my children after either me or DH. Thankfully DH agrees.

hermanavelasquez

pnwlover12 said:

hermanavelasquez said:

Hmm... This is a little different in Dominican Republic (or in other hispanic countries) because we don't change our lastname and children have their mother's last name as their second last name (it figures in all documents, etc).  It is still very common here to name daughters after their mothers, but not as common as it used to be, although now is an increasing use of adapting mother's name to a boy and it is still very common to use the grandmother's name. 

Mine is a very unique name and my husband would like it for a daughter, but we have other names in mind.  

Having the same name repeated in one family often leads to confusion and every child is unique, so it should be good to make an effort to give them a name that reminds their individuality, but also giving a parents name is meaningful and keeps traditions. 

@hermanavelasquez - You are from the Dominican Republic? I'm jealous. Going there is on my bucket list and I think we're going to do it for my 30th birthday. Can I pick your brain someday? I want a local's inside tips!

For sure! I will send you a private message.