Recurrent Chemical Pregnancies - Need some Encouragement

MnM425

Hi Ladies,

Even though I've been TTC for four years now, I'm totally new to this whole pregnancy board thing, but I figured I'd give it a try. I really need some positive vibes and any encouragement/success stories you guys have to offer.  I've never been one to give up on anything (almost stubbornly so), but I feel myself breaking at this point.  I've had four chemical pregnancies in the past 3 years.  Two were with Clomid treatment, and 2 were with IVF. Both IVF cycles we had 2 embies transferred, and all of them were really good quality.  My last C/P was just a couple days ago.  My RE is still trying to remain hopeful with this one though, because since my HCG dropped only from 417 to 310, she thinks I might have just lost one of the two.  I have to go back Monday for another hcg to confirm.  I'm trying to stay hopeful, but part of me is so bitter and tired of always being given false hope, only to have it be confirmed that yes I did indeed lose yet another one.  So my first question is, have any of you had that happen to you (drop in hcg because of vanishing twin syndrome) and ended up with a successful pregnancy afterwards?  Second, if this does end up being my fourth C/P - have any of you been able to conceive successfully after so many recurrent chemicals?  I've had every test done you can think of, and everything always comes back normal.  I do have PCOS, but that's what we have to go through IVF for.  I'm assuming there's something going on with implantation, but no one has any answers for me.  I keep being told that "it's normal" to go through this, and we just have to keep trying.  How can it be normal to keep losing every pregnancy at the exact same time (5w to 5w2d)?  I'm just really frustrated and tired and feel really alone.  I feel like no one around me gets it.  I feel like no one understands how suffocatingly horrifying it is to think of the possibility of never being able to have a child of my own.  Anyway, if any one of you has any positive words of advice, it would be much appreciated.

Thanks!

Me 35 with PCOS, DH 40 with slightly low sperm motility

TTC 4 years

2010: tried naturally, no success

2011: 3 rounds of Clomid, 7/11 BFP - C/P at 5w2d

          next round of Clomid 10/11 BFP - C/P at 5w2d

          HSG: normal

          SIS: normal

          Complete blood w/u:  normal

2012: 6 rounds of Femara - BFNs

          3 rounds of Clomid with Gonatropins and IUI - BFNs

2013: IVF#1 - failed retrieval b/c RE hit artery leading to significant blood loss

IVF#2 - 6 embies, 2 good quality transferred at 5d

             6dp5dt - faint BFP, 7dp5dt - hcg 30, 9dp5dt - hcg 70

           11dp5dt - hcg 140, 13dp5dt hcg 270 - C/P that night

         Karyotype - both normal

         FET #1 - transferred 2 good quality embryos - BFN

2014: IVF#3 - 6 embies, 2 good quality transferred at 5d

                      7dp5dt faint BFP, 9dp5dt hcg 70; 13dp5dt hcg417

                      15dp5dt hcg 310

luvboston

Hugs it sounds to me like you have implantation failure and need to see a reproductive immunologist. I had 6 m/c and finally had a healthy LO.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but if your beta is dropping there is a very small chance of a vanishing twin, doctors tried to sell me on that twin business but it was never true.

Hugs

MnM425

Thank you.  I just took a HPT and it was REALLY faint, so I'm sure I've lost both.  I'm barely able to cope with 4 losses - I don't know how you went through 6.  I'll look into trying to see a Reproductive Immunologist.  Thanks for the advice!

MnM425

I had to take Methylprednisone with my IVF protocol - which from I understand is a little more potent than Prednisone?  I guess I could ask my RE the difference when I see her next.  It looks like you were able to have 2 little ones after going through everything you went through - that must be so amazing.  I'm feeling better after the couple of responses I have gotten - I feel like there's still hope.  Thank you for the advice and for the well wishes!  

wille2b

I also suffered many losses and was unable to stay pregnant until we used Methylprednisone throughout the pregnancy. I would talk to your RE and see if an autoimmune issue is maybe at fault. We also tested for autoimmune and everything looked ok but I kept miscarrying until we left the steroid on the table through the entire pregnancy! Good luck hope you get some answers and good news soon

MnM425

Yes, I've had RPL testing, and everything looked fine.  I'm not sure how extensive the blood work was though.  I know they tested for clotting disorders and some autoimmune factors.  Staying on Methylprednisone throughout the pregnancy actually makes a lot of sense.  It seems that I've all 4 of mine a few days after they had me stop the steroids….

I have an appointment with my RE this Tuesday.  I'll have to discuss all of these things with her that you wonderful ladies have brought up.  Thanks again for all the advice and support.  It makes me feel less alone and more hopeful after hearing from all of you.