Control Issues

alishakay

I went with matched birthmom to her ultrasound today, amazing! I got to see his little face and he was moving constantly. Some good pics and healthy measurements! 32 weeks 5 days! I found out today she has gestational diabetes, and I'm gonna try not to overthink the next 7 weeks. Just like everything else throughout this adoption journey, yet another thing out of my control. It's not like I can make sure she eats right and checks her blood sugar regularly. I took her to the pharmacy and got the monitor and strips, so I think she'll keep it under control, I just worry. Other than that all is well, 7 more weeks, I can't believe this is actually happening!

CarolinaGirl2014

How exciting! Please don't take this as an attack but please be careful using the term birthmom until she has signed TPR- until then she is simply expectant mom or mom. I think that's something that's an industry standard but I now find it upsetting and manipulative to expectant moms (not that you're manipulating, but that the standard term is). I was A's Mom until I signed TPR, but so was her AMom if that makes any sense. On that same note, she loves that little boy dearly to choose life for him and be willing to place him, so she'll most likely do everything in her power to protect him. I was insanely careful about EVERYTHING that came in contact with my body when I was pregnant with A and pumping for her. I've known several people with GD and no NICU or preterm babies.
Enjoy these last few weeks of sleep while your little boy finishes growing.

alishakay

You're so right! Thank you for saying that about that term "birthmom", that's why I love this board, because this is new and I don't know all of the dos and donts, I appreciate the honesty! I have no doubt she wants the best for this baby, but considering her situation (unknown to the rest of the world) I just worry she's has the resources to what she needs, if that makes sense? And when doctors are talking risk factors, and mention the word "stillborn" I panic and worry. I think it's just a natural reaction for any person, I am just scared for anything to go wrong at this point, and not just selfishly for myself. I have an amazing relationship with her, she truly has been a blessing in our lives, and a new friend for life! Thanks for listening and mentioning knowing others that have experienced GD without any complications:)

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CarolinaGirl2014

So glad that didn't come across as harsh! I totally get what you mean- I feel the same way when I have pregnant friends who I think don't have all the knowledge they could about it. I think you could always offer to help her in a way that won't offend her, like "Hey, know this whole GD thing sucks for you because you have to change everything. If you'd like I could help you find some info on it, help you meal plan or shop together, etc." A's Mom offered to help me very casually with some pregnancy stuff and I LOVED having another support. I'd go to her for tips on proper diet, supplements, etc, whenever something came up and it was great to be a team so early.

HopingforChange

Lurker here! I had GD and baby was just fine. Serious complications are really rare. Just wanted to reassure you.