Natural Birth

How do you push?

I had an epidural with our first, and I effectively pushed after nurses recommended forcepts or vacuum. Somehow I turned it around and she came out quick. For second I will not accept pain meds, but cannot find any info except to think of pushing as pooping. Is this accurate?

Breathing? Sounds? Positions, Mantras? May I ask, how do you actually push? Or is it that without an epidural it is just easier to "know how?"

Re: How do you push?

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  • mb314mb314 member

    For me, I had that uncontrollable urge to push.  I was laboring in the tub, but the hospital made me get out of the tub and wait for a cervical check before pushing - um, yeah, that wasn't happening.  It was impossible not to push.  I also did some "secret pushing" in the tub because I didn't want to leave the tub ;)

    I ended up pushing on my back on the bed (although the back of the bed was pushed up so I was upright).  I could have pushed in another position, but I was tired, and didn't want to move after my cervical check.

    I didn't need to be told to push and didn't need to be told how to.  I just did what my body told me to do.  For me, pushing was the easiest part of my labor.  My contractions spread out, and were less painful.  I did tear, but I didn't feel it.

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  • mb314 said:
    I ended up pushing on my back on the bed (although the back of the bed was pushed up so I was upright).  I could have pushed in another position, but I was tired, and didn't want to move after my cervical check.

    I didn't need to be told to push and didn't need to be told how to.  I just did what my body told me to do.  For me, pushing was the easiest part of my labor.  My contractions spread out, and were less painful.  I did tear, but I didn't feel it.

    this was my experience exactly. there was a natural urge to push, and it was the easiest part of labor for me- it was a relief to feel like you were channeling the contraction into something. i think you will know what to do.

    in hypnobirthing, there's a visualization for imagining yourself opening like a flower. you are also supposed to try to concentrate on not clenching your jaw, as this tightens up your whole body. this document has some relaxation scripts in it. there are guided relaxation/visualization videos on youtube as well-- search for for "positive affirmations for birth" or "guided mediations for birth" and you should come up with some good ones.
  • I have had 3 med-free HB.

    I hate it when people tell FTM "you'll know when to push." That is not true for everyone (it wasn't for me) and therefore isn't helpful.

    With J. (my first), I had no idea what I was doing. I had horrendous back labor with him. Finally, I said I couldn't do it anymore and take me to the hospital. My MW convinced me to let her check my progress. (I hadn't had any checks until then). Lo and behold, I was 10 cm. Yet, the contractions still felt like first stage contractions to me. It took forever in the pushing stage for me to feel a difference. That made it hard for me to push effectively.  At one point, my MW's assistant said "maybe we should have her change positions". And my MW said that I was pushing effectively so to just let me be for a little longer.

    She said that if I didn't make much progress with the next couple pushes, they'd have me change positions. Anyway, that got me really trying to push, but I still had no clue what I was doing. For some reason, the thought of pushing like pooping flew out of my brain and no one mentioned it. Anyway, because I really did not want to move, I did my best to push. And something worked because out came his head (after 3+ hours of pushing)...and 2 hands. But that was the first time I felt the contraction "disappeared" if I was pushing. It took hours of awful contractions to get there. He had 2 nuchal hands.

    With A., I knew it was time to push because there I was in the labor tub, thinking "really, I need to poop now?!" Then I realized that it meant it was time to push. And 15 minutes later I was holding her.

    With S. I felt like I had to pee. I told DH to help me to the bathroom. I tried and tried to pee (I really felt like I had to go. And it'd been hours since I had.) but couldn't. I told DH to fill the birth tub so I could get in as soon as the MW arrived (she was on her way). Then I felt S. descending and said "on second thought, just catch the baby!"  2 pushes later we were holding S.

    TL:DR With my first, I had no idea what I was doing. But in retrospect, it is very much like pooping. Don't be discouraged if you don't feel a strong urge to push right away in the pushing stage. 
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  • Google C breathing or J breathing. There was a YouTube video from New Zealand that helped me. Except she says you breathe the baby out instead of pushing, which I think is a crock. As far as pushing, for me it was more like a reverse kiegel than it was pooping. You know the muscles you are tightening when you Kiegel, well, you push those outward instead of tightening them inward at the same time you are pushing with your stomach muscles.
  • sschwegesschwege member
    edited June 2014
    You have two things going for you this time, first of all you have already had one vaginal birth, most moms find pushing a lot easier the second time.  For me it was infinitely easier, with my first I pushed for an hour, with my second he was out in 2 pushes/same contraction.  Plus my second was almost a pound heavier and had a much bigger head than DD and it was still easier!  Second, since you plan not to get an epi, it should be easier because you will have a better sense of where to direct your energy because you won't be numb.  

    As far as advice, just do what feels natural to you.  Write in your birth plan that you want self-directed pushing.  Nobody should be telling you when to start pushing or counting.  For me, when I felt a contraction starting I would take a deep breath and push, my MWs asked that I just give it 3 good pushes per contraction and then to stop even if the contraction was not over.  You can google birthing positions and you should get some good pictures, anything is better than pushing on your back in terms of opening your pelvis, though I will admit I was a back pusher both times, it's what felt right, so do research, but be open to anything!

    I will say that I agree with @barnwife that you might not always just know when to push.  With both of my babies I never felt that overwhelming desire to push many women talk about.  I felt pressure, but never that, "I HAVE to push!" feeling.  With my first I was fully dilated, but chose to 'labor down' for 1.5+ hours because I didn't want to get out of the bath, even when I decided to push it wasn't because I needed to, I was just ready to be done.  With my second it was the triage nurse who alerted me to the fact that it might be time to push, when my MW came in, I laid down and DH could visibly see the head, I had no clue DS was that close to being born.  My water didn't break with either, so I'm sure that dulled the sensation of wanting to push.  
  • I had similar concerns with #2 because I had an epidural with #1. Unknowingly I labored down #2 to the point where she was crowning. I bore down once and she was completely out. It was so easy .No ring of fire, no pushing pain. Just out she came. My midwife and doula kept asking me if I felt pushy (literally right up until the point when she was born) and I never did. I think I did feel like I had to poop, but I confused it for thinking I actually had to poop and didn't want to poop in the tub! 

    I guess I'm not really helpful. I think your body knows what to do and it just happens. The baby WILL come out one way or another, whether you recognize the signs to push or not! 
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  • My water never broke either. My daughter was born en caul, so maybe that had something to do with me never feeling the urge to push. 
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  • I had an epidural with my first and I couldn't feel much of anything, when it was time to push the nurse suggested I focus my breath and push through my bottom. For me, I really like this instruction, DS 1 was out in 2 pushes. With DD I felt "pushy" toward the end of each contraction and just went with each little push sensation. With DS2 the urge to push came out of no where and was completely not controllable. It felt like a reverse dry heave. Like when you need to throw up, and you know it's going to happen and you couldn't stop it if you wanted to.
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  • I am a doula and in one of my training classes, the instructor described it as pushing with your pee muscles, not your poop muscles. I think directing the energy more forward may help. I never had the urge to push with DD (no epi but had to be directed) and i am really hoping i do this time!
  • I agree with the other ladies who said your body pretty much takes over.  It was almost involuntary.  I couldn't NOT push.  (I had an epi with my first, not really by choice/long story and I HATED that feeling.  I needed a mirror because I couldn't tell if I was pushing or not).
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  • My body was pushing with or without my help.... the urge was so overwhelming that it was incredibly painful to resist pushing when my body contracted. My doula had me panting through the contractions for a little while because we were waiting for my OB to arrive.... I'd had a rapid progression, so she had to rush to the hospital and barely made it in time to catch!

    One thing I definitely recommend is to find a position that is not only most effective and comfortable for you, but that also puts most of your energy and pressure at your vagina. My feet were in stirrups (which next time I hope to avoid since I'm pretty sure that position contributed to my tear), and at first I was struggling to make progress because I was pushing too much into my feet. My doula then told me to use my hands to pull back my thighs, which directed all my strength into pushing my baby out. After that, it only took two pushes to get him out (with some nice, calming breaths between contractions).

    I guess you could say it feels something like pooping, but honestly, I don't find the sensation comparable to anything else. It's pretty unmistakable when you don't have meds, though! Good luck!
    "Can I call your baby 'Ze Munchkin,' or 'ZM' for short?" - my best friend
  • With my first I never did voluntarily push.  My body just took over and she was here.  It was rather like when you have diarrhea or something and you can't not poop.  It was involuntary muscles doing all the work.

    With my second I wouldn't call it an urge to push.  I would say I felt my body taking over and decided to try to add some more energy to what was already happening.

    I think it's probably a bit different for everyone every birth.  Baby's position, your position, your energy level, etc all lead to too many variables to allow it to be exactly the same. 

    My suggestion would be know that unless your baby isn't handling the contractions well there is no need to pressure yourself to do something.  Give yourself the time to feel what's right for your situation.

  • I had an epidural with my first, and went natural with my second.  Pushed for >3 hours with my first (he was eventually delivered by forceps after a failed vaccum attempt).  Pushed for 7 minutes with my second.  To make this even more impressive, my second was OP (worse position for delivering) while my first was ROA (not perfect, but better).  Both my babies were similarly sized.

    I was really worried about pushing with my second because it had been so long and difficult with my first (plus I had a terrible recovery).  My MWs assured me that, as a STM, I would not push for as long and would not need a forceps birth.  And they were right!

    With my second, I think the biggest difference, other than the fact that the tissues had already stretched delivering another baby, was that I used self-directed pushing.  I pushed when I felt the urge to do so and only pushed as hard and long as I wanted/needed to.  I found this to be much more effective than the "purple pushing" that they have you do in hospitals.  I was also able to change positions to find what felt right.  I had originally thought I would push on all fours or in a squat, but when the time came, side lying really felt best.

    Good luck!


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    BFP#2:  EDD 2/11/14, MMC confirmed 7/15/13 (growth stopped at 6 weeks), D&C @ 12 weeks 7/25/13

  • I had the overwhelming urge to push so much that the doctor would make me wait cause it started at 8cm with each baby.  It was more painful to try not to push and very difficult.  I would equate what I felt like having to poop.  I stayed as vertical as comfortable and bore down like I was pooping and each baby was out in a couple of pushes.  Pushing to me actually feels good cause it is relief and I know we are done. 



    Natural M/c 12/13/08 at 8w5d 

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  • try reading the hypnobirth book. maybe take a course. 
  • I never had the urge.  They checked me and I was a 10 and she was very low, so I started pushing.  It took me a while to "figure it out".  I was exhaling as I was pushing, which they told me to stop doing.  So I held my breath while pushing.  I only pushed with contractions, and it completely took away the contraction pain.  She was out in 45 minutes (FTM) with no ring of fire or pain at all.  

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  • Your uterus is a muscle. It flexes on its own. For my 2nd birth it happened all by its self. I agree with the other posts about not being in control of pushing. Your body does it for you, if you wait it out til your body is ready. And isn't that the point? listening to our bodies?
    Good Luck!
  • I can't wait to read these and make a few notes. Thank you!!!!!!
  • You just get that feeling to bear down and push almost like you gotta poop. I know it sounds crazy but it is totally true that's how I knew I just had this uncontrollable feeling of needing to push. Don't worry your body knows what to do by nature. I bred horses for a long time and it's truly amazing seeing the "first time fillies" figure it out.
  • @BloomingMomma‌ not sure how far along you are, but try checking out The Bradley Method. The classes are 12weeks and are a great source of info and prep :) GL!!

    Me:Hypothyroid DH: Type II diabetic. Together since 03/2007, Married 10/2011, D/C bc 10/2011. TTC: 11/2011. Charted BBT and CV along with OPK 10/2011-02/2012 Baseline labs 02/2012 WNL, SA 03/2012: botched sample by lab - destroyed hubby's confidence. 04/2012 Clomid 05/2012 Clomid 06/2012 Clomid 07/2012 Clomid and Ovidrel 08/2012 Ovidrel (I never knew that I was supposed to be monitored while on meds...I never was. I asked for u/s and other tests to see why we weren't getting pregnant, doc just kept giving me meds and telling me to go to his church for a "laying of hands") Stopped all monitoring/testing/temps, etc, Sex became a chore and we started to grow apart. At 12 mos I decided to look for another doc. 02/2013 consult with new doc....3 days later testing began...u/s, all good, HSG: all good, labs: all good, ovulating, etc. Started on Pregnitude. 04/2013 failed attempt for SA, 05/2013 failed attempt SA. 12/2013 SA: 3% morph, abnormal functionality. DH started Pycnogenol. RE consult 01/15/2014.

    ALL Welcome :)

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  • jenn43jenn43 member
    I definitely would compare it to throwing up.  There's just no way to stop if your body needs to push.

  • Thank you! Over 20 weeks so I think a good idea to try Bradley!

    @BloomingMomma‌ not sure how far along you are, but try checking out The Bradley Method. The classes are 12weeks and are a great source of info and prep :) GL!!

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