just gonna vent real quick here..

MrsT0514

Pardon my bitchy tone, but I just need to vent for a hot second here. Also...disclaimer...I do realize part of this may be due to hormones.

My brother is getting married tomorrow and rehearsal/rehearsal dinner is tonight. All of my family lives 2 hours away which is where the wedding is. I, MH, and DS are all in the wedding which required me to go there for bridesmaid dress fittings and we did phone orders for the tuxes. Living 2 hrs away from everything needed for this wedding has kind of been a PITA, but whatever. Its my brother and we're honored to be a part of it.

That said, im sure you all know the par forthe course hassle/complaining that normally ensues with wedding planning and prep. My mom has been an integral part of the prep and has done her share of bitching about stuff regarding the wedding. And I've voiced frustrations here and there too.

Well today my mom called to relay a miscommunication about the tuxes and I got a little annoyed (plus I've been dealing with relentless sneezing from allergies all morning, and I'm just busy trying to get everything ready/organized, so im already on egde). But i didnt flip or anything..i was more just annoyed that the woman from the tux place didnt relay this info to me sooner. Had nothing to do with my mom.

Well all of a sudden, she decides to throw a guilt trip on me, saying that my "constant aggravation" with all the wedding stuff has hurt her feelings and that I should remember that we all did our part on my wedding just a few years ago.

Uhh..WTAF? If anyone has been doing most of the bitching its been her, so it just plain pisses me off that she's flipping it around on me. Not to mention, she's within 10 minutes of everything, I'm 2 hours away. Not that I'm trying to play pain Olympics, but I apologize if I'm just crunched for time and trying to get my shit in order here. That said, I dont understand her thought process about having HER feelings hurt. My frustration about feeling crunched for time/disorganized having nothing to do with her. But she's making it about her. Like she does in a lot of situations.

Tl; dr My brother's wedding prep is stressing everyone out, but my mom decided to turn it around on me and say that my "constant aggravation" is hurting her feelings...even though it had nothing to do with her. I realize I'm probably being a hormonal bitch about this too, but wtf.

ILoveBoys

I feel your pain. I'd probably be like "mom it's not always about you."

MrsT0514

ILoveBoys said:

I feel your pain. I'd probably be like "mom it's not always about you."

This is kinda where I'm at. She pulls this crap a lot. She somehow manages to interject herself and her own feelings into situations that often have absolutely nothing to do with her. It drives me fucking batty.

MrsT0514

LovelyRitaMeterMaid said:

I hate weddings.

Lol. I hear ya! I personally love weddings. I like attending them and I loved mine...but being a part of someone else's? Although its an honor, its also a huge fucking pain in my ass.

MrsT0514

I guess I'm more surprised at the fact that her attitude has done a complete 180. All along, my mom has been the one doing a lot of the bitching regarding prep and I've been the one that just sits and listens (a lot og her stress was due to lack of help from the bride's parents and her MOH, plus my mom overextends herself and can't say no...not to mention, my brother's fiance is a nice girl and she makes him happy so thats what matters obviously, but she's damn high maintenance and needs things "just so").

Now that we're down to wire and all running around like crazy, she flips it on me and tells me I'm hurting HER feelings? Are ya kidding me right now?

MrsT0514

@CtGirl30 My logical brain tells me you're absolutely right and I should let it slide.

However, my hormonal/emotional brain is reallyfuckingannoyed with her right now, bc she does this shit to herself. Everytime a big event is over and done with she gets on her soapbox saying "thats it, I'm done doing it all...its too exhausting, I need a break, I'm doing me now". Then, next thing you know, something else comes up and there she is, doing it all, being the people-pleasing martyr, making herself crazy. Then I usually end up hearing her bitch/have a breakdown about how stressed she is.

ILoveBoys

My MIL is a very sweet, very chill kind of lady- I seriously love her. That said, when my SIL got married last July, she kind of got nuts. So I'm inclined to think it happens to the best of them and maybe hers was extra bc if her personality anyway.

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Manateearmz

This is the reason I hate being in weddings. I will attended and bring a gift but it is YOUR day not mine. I don't want the stress.

fintin

Do I hear a bitch pitch in you voice? Haha

Honestly it sounds like everyone is just stressed. If it was me and my mom I would just blow this off till after the wedding when I could be calm (for the sake of myself) and just let her know that none of my frustration about the tux was about her. I dont think it's your hormones. Weddings just suck ass!

KTdidit

Being the day before your bro's wedding I'm sure she is just stressed. My mom takes on way too much too, luckily she's good at it and doesn't take stress out on everyone else. Try to let it slide and if she mentions it again after the wedding then say something. 

[Deleted User]

This is why we were married a week after he proposed. I didn't have a dress. There was no pomp and circumstance. It booze, good food,and a few good friends, in a place that was special to us. Anything else would have been too much for me.

Monkeybabe

Weddings are a lot of stress, especially if you're farther away. I'm glad I've only been asked to be in one wedding.