* NO LONGER THE BEST *

momofcatan

You can't be tagged so I hope you see this. I want to know how going back to work is going? For me it is such a shock only seeing DD a couple hours a day, but I enjoy being back in my old routine.

No longer the best

Hey!! i was totally thinking of you and actually thought about starting a back to work mom's post!! 

It is hard. I feel like balancing all the things makes me want to have a nervous breakdown one minute and get myself cape because I'm super woman/Mom the next minute! My husband is on afternoon shift so I get no help from him with childcare/dinner prep. Although he has been doing one chore for me whether it is dishes or vacuuming and that is helpful.

The work part itself is good. I am lucky I like my job and it almost feels like I never left.  But Malcolm is sooo tired that he gets cranky faster and should be in bed right at 6 but it is usually 630-7 before I put him to sleep.

Thanks for checking in with me! I'm glad you are enjoying the routine! How is she in day-care? 

momofcatan

Hey! Thats tough that you husband is working afternoons. Things are going OK for me. Right now what is tough is that I get no direct communication with the DCP. DH does DC drop off (because I start work earlier), my mom or mil (or today FIL) have done pickups and then DH picks up from them and bring DD home so I can go straight home and make dinner. This system works except on days like today when DH tells me DD had diarrhea (never ever happened before) and I have no other details.

weddinginthecove

I'm crashing this thread...hopefully that's okay. I ran into the office today to just get some back to work info and chat with my manager. I am on the two week countdown now to go back and am having so much anxiety/dread over it. Seeing that you girls are doing well is helpful for me. I have been off for a year and a half now (6 months sick leave) and I cannot even think about going back there. I also do not have a love for my job, and feel that it is going to be even harder for me now that I have a child of my own. I think my dread is in part because I can't imagine leaving L for that long every day when the most I have been gone from him is a few hours here and there, and in part because I really do not want to go back to my job. Plus, to be honest I really loved the freedom of being able to go wherever I wanted whenever I wanted and not be confined to Friday to Sundays (within reason I guess considering I had a baby). Anyways glad to hear that you girls are doing well and I will be dreading each and every day now until the 30th of June hits. 

No longer the best

Oh man! @araziza That would be a bit frustrating! How is she doing now? Our usual plan is for me to do drop off and DH to do pick up but I have a feeling it will be all over the place! It feels a bit exciting now that it is the weekend and to celebrate we are going to the zoo (out here in Niagara) tomorrow!

@weddinginthecove I don't mind you crashing! I do feel for you going back to a job you don't like makes it a MILLION times worse.  I was like you I had some serious dread leading up to it, at one point my anxiety got so bad I wasn't sleeping for a good loooong few days. And a few things people told me helped and I don't know if they will for you

1) take it one day at a time if you think of it in shorter chunks of time it is easier to bear (at least for me)

2) Reeeally look at your financial situation and see how much it would cost and how you would have to live for you to SAH and either way no matter what you decide you will come out of the exercise better off.  At first I wanted to stab the woman who told me this in the eye because she is SAH but when I really thought about it I decided I WANTED to go back to work because I like my job, but also because I want to give Malcolm some really cool experiences which we could never do if I didn't work,

3) An honest discussion with my husband about what if I CAN'T make working work. For me knowing that IF worse came to worse at work and I couldn't take it (when I left I got a new supervisor that was stressing me out) and being away from Malcolm was so awful, he was okay with me quitting even if it would be a significant lifestyle change.  That took some of the pressure off of me and I felt like I was going to work because I CHOSE to because I value my career and because of the life I want to give Malcolm and it made my perspective change.

PHEW that was a novel. If you read it I hope it offers a tiny bit of comfort and if not DRINK ALL THE WINE!

weddinginthecove

Sorry @no longer the best I wasn't avoiding you we went away to our cabin for a week with very little internet/I unplugged so I couldn't respond. We have had the discussion about me staying home a few times now. He agrees that he wishes we could do it and maybe someday I will be able to. Right now (for the past 12 years) he works at a seasonal job in Alberta, where he works from September to March and then has the other half of the year home drawing EI/has no income. For us the months he is away would be totally doable for me to SAH but when he is at home we just cannot swing it on one EI income or possibly no income at all. I am also the one with the health/dental insurance etc. So unless he gets another job that is more year round it doesn't look good. We have thought about it from every angle that we possibly can and I just cannot see how I could do it. I guess the bonus of that is that my husband is home with him for 6 months of the year, so he still gets that one on one time. He has been such an awesome father and has definitely did his part and more. Like you, I also think about the lifestyle I want to give my child and I know things like travelling would never be possible on one income. I am kind of just hoping that once I go back it will not be as bad as I have it built up in my head and I will learn to deal with it. I think the dread of this time ending and the daily countdown I am doing is the worst part.