Cautiously Optimistic (intro/loss mentioned)

junebugjam · June 2014

Hi everyone. I am hoping to be joining in with you on the board. I just got my BFP this morning. It was our first cycle TTC after the loss of our daughter a few months ago, so I'm shocked it happened so quickly, but I am thrilled.

A little backstory on me:

My husband and I were married in July 2012 and started TTC in August 2013. I found out I was pregnant for the 1st time in November of 2013, and I was due this July 18, 2014. My pregnancy was going along perfectly, so I thought. I had very few symptoms, no morning sickness, etc. All my appointments and tests were coming back completely normal. We had the Panorama test and knew we were having a girl at around 14 weeks. When we went in for our anatomy scan at 20 weeks, the baby was diagnosed with a significant heart defect. I will spare you the details, but it was a 1 in 100,000 diagnosis and the prognosis was not good. We were sent to all kinds of doctors, wound up at CHOP, and eventually decided to TFMR in March. It was the worst decision of our lives and we are still struggling with the loss of our baby girl, Amelia, but we knew we wanted a take-home baby so badly.

We have had so many tests done since her loss and everything came back 100% normal. Every doctor we've seen tells me it was just a "fluke." We were told to wait 2 cycles before TTC, which we did, and we were lucky enough to conceive this baby on our first cycle trying. I am terrified that history will repeat itself since no doctor can give me a reason for why Amelia's heart didn't develop properly, but I am trying to stay positive and remember that this is a new pregnancy and just hope and pray baby with be healthy. I will probably be considered high risk with this pregnancy and we've been offered the opportunity to go back to CHOP between 12-14 weeks for an early scan of the heart to alleviate our worries, instead of waiting for the 20 week ultrasound. I don't think I will feel completely confident and happy in this pregnancy until I make it to that point and hopefully hear that everything is okay this time.

Sorry for being so long-winded! Love to you if you made it this far!

Look forward to getting to know everyone

MrsPinkPeony · June 2014

So sorry for your loss. So happy for your BFP! FX for a happy and healthy 9 months!

dreemkin84 · June 2014

Im so sorry for your loss. I hope you get your take home baby!!

boxerrrmama85 · June 2014

So sorry for your loss-- welcome to February 2014

glad you are here! Congrats.

cls78 · June 2014

Sorry for you loss. FX this is your take home baby!

stellasoo · June 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. Congrats on this BFP and I hope everything goes perfect this time.

Goldie000 · June 2014

Welcome and congrats! I'm sorry for your previous loss. FX for H & H 9 months to you

FlowerPower16 · June 2014

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Just out of curiosity what heart defect did your daughter have? Our daughter had severe HLHS. Congrats on your BFP! FX that this is your take home baby!

lulu783 · June 2014

Welcome and congrats on your BFP! I'm so sorry on the loss of your daughter Amelia. I am sending t&p's your way for a happy and healthy pregnancy!

alleycat39 · June 2014

Congrats!! I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss of Amelia. Many T&P to you that this pregnancy goes smoothly. You are in wonderful hands at CHOP!

kbelly777 · June 2014

So sorry for you loss. Congrats on already getting a BFP and Welcome!

junebugjam · June 2014

@FlowerPower16‌ Her defect was a combo of a couple things, not sure there was even one specific name. She had Pulmonary Artesia (the pulmonary artery was closed off so they couldn't repair it and didn't connect where it should have), she had 2 holes in her heart, the ventricles were not separated properly and the aorta was attached to the incorrect ventricle.