What questions would you ask the embryologist?

przemosbabe

Hi girls!

So this is my first IVF cycle and I had my retrieval yesterday. They got 12 eggs from 12 follicles. Two of those follicles were 25mm at the time of trigger shot, so I was expecting those to be too mature. So I was expecting 10. So out of those 12 eggs, two of them were indeed over mature. 6 of those were immature I only stilled for 9 days. They wanted to trigger me after 7 says but I refused as I have read that women who stim for less than 9 days are rarely successful. I'm glad I pushed for that because like I said, stimmimg for 9 days still left me with 6 out of 10 eggs immature. Well today, they told me the 4 eggs that were mature fertilized. They do not check the embryos again until 3 days. I'm so nervous I won't get any to transfer!

So I want to ask the embryologist questions when I talk to them Thursday. I have no idea what to ask though as this is my first IVF and don't know what to ask. What would you ladies ask?

I am particularly curious about the quality of my eggs. I am also curious about the embryos

Thanks ladies. Please hope for me that my little embryos make it. I know with four chances are slim.

jaztastic

When they call on Thursday, it may or may not be the embryologist. Sometimes its just a nurse or an aid calling with updates so they may not have answers to questions. But they should tell you how they are growing, how many cells each is, if any arrested or not. I would ask about overall quality and if there is any fragmentation. I take it you are doing a day 5 transfer?

pblge

I've never actually talked to an embryologist before, so I would have a lot more questions for your RE. I would ask him/her for an assessment of this cycle, including whether a change in protocol would have yielded better results. I would ask for recommendations for things you can do to improve egg quality, too.

It does seem unusual to have such a small number of embryos be at the right stage. You mentioned on another post what city you're cycling in, and I will tell you that I decided not to go to that clinic (it's closer than the clinic I chose) because their success rates are pretty low. I'm very much hoping that this cycle works for you--it does, after all, really one take one--but in the future you might want to consider a different RE.

Sending lots of positive thoughts. (((hugs)))

ETA: Sorry if this post was discouraging! Didn't mean to be snotty.

AMShark

I'm sorry you had a low number of properly mature eggs, but I'm glad to hear that they all fertilized.  

My talk with the embryologist felt like a progress report - She told me what fertilized, what split, how many cells, and whether there was any fragmentation.

I had a low number fertilize, and only 2 split, but if I'd had more, I would have asked questions about freezing.  What are the criteria for freezing embryo's?  That sort of thing.

Good luck to you.  May all four of your embryo's continue to grow.

runawaylaurel

I'm so sorry you had such a low number of mature eggs. I had a similar situation- 12 retrieved, 7 mature, 4 fertilized normally. I worried so much the days leading up to my transfer! One embryo was absolutely perfect on day 5, one was lagging but still made it to freeze, and the other 2 didn't make it. But still, have hope!

The embryologist won't have the data on your cycle. Like @pblge‌ said, that's your RE's side of the house. Good luck.

przemosbabe

@pblge‌ I am extremely disturbed by your post. I was not even all that upset about my situation because I know the first IVF likely wont work, but after reading your post, like I already said im disturbed. I simply wanted to know what girls would ask the embryologist if they had a chance to talk to them. The number of mature eggs I had has nothing to do with the RE. This is my first IVF, the RE had no idea now I would respond to any protocol as he has never worked with me before and didnt have much to go on other than my 3 IUI cycles. The first IVF is like a big puzzle. I am happy at this clinic, they have done nothing wrong, and they have lower success rates because they don't turn anyone away, unless its the case of a pregnancy is dangerous to the mothers health. Most others clinics will cherry pick their patients because they are worried about their success rates, and won't let women past a certain age cycle with their own eggs, women with a low AFC, overweight women, women with an FSH past a certain number and all sorts of women.. CNY takes everyone I will consider another RE when this one gives me a reason to do so. Please tell me, how is it the REs fault my body was ready to trigger sooner than they thought? Me stimming so fast is why I had immature eggs. ------- To everyone else, it is indeed the embryologist I am talking to Thursday, and I am talking to her about the eggs and embryos, not the overall cycle. I know that the number of mature eggs had something to do with the fact that I only stimmed for 9 days. I had follicles close to 20mm after only 6 days of stimming (I think) and I ovulated on a past follistim IUI cycle after only 6 days of stimming. There definitely needs to be a change in protocol but for right now I am just wondering what I should ask the embryologist as far as the eggs that were mature and the growing embryos. They seemed to be very happy that the 4 mature eggs I did have all fertilized. I'm not happy with this but they are.

przemosbabe

@IFinTN‌ I don't see anything wrong with letting someone know that what they wrote offended you. Offense is in the eye of the beholder. Just because what she was saying didnt offend you doesnt mean it didnt offend me, the person it was directed to, and obviously she knew it could possibly be offensive because she edited it to apologize before i even read what she wrote. My response was not hostile I was simply pointing out that this is my first IVF and nothing can be predicted in your first IVF cycle. I thought her post was rude and it disturbed me while I am just trying to stay calm. It was also unnecessary because I was simply asking everyone what they would ask the embryologist had they had the chance. Further, success rates do matter, but when you turn absolutely nobody anyway ( unless a pregnancy would be dangerous to the mother) they are going to be lower than others. When I cycle the next time, I will talk to the RE about a different protocol. But until I do, and unless he gives me another protocol that doesn't work or yields similar results, , I think it's too early to be blaming my RE for things he could not predict or control. This board is for support and girls here have been great so far, better than any other website I have been on. So I would honestly prefer not to argue and would really appreciate all the advice I can get on what I should ask the embryologist when I speak to her.

przemosbabe

As I said, offense is in the eye of the beholder. And it's not the suggestion of a new clinic that is offense, it's the way this suggestion was given when I simply asked what I should ask the embryologist when she calls me for an update. This is about eggs and embryos . And what I should ask the person who is working with them so I can better understand when she calls me for a check up. Its a little too early to blame things on this clinic, and I don't see how getting 4 mature eggs out of 12 ( when women who have more eggs can ALSO have a low number mature) is their fault at this time. Period. Thank you so much for your well wishes. If any ladies out there do have some advice about what I should ask the embryologist, I patiently await it, and thank you in advance.

jaztastic

@przemosbabe‌ sorry you took what @pblge‌ said so harsh. I know it probably doesn't mean too much to you but she made some valid points. It's cool you told her you were offended, but you did kind of go off a bit. I think her intentions were to be helpful in an honest way, not mean. Keep in mind you asked a question on an Internet forum, people will respond... Some times we will agree and some times we won't. Us more seasoned IVFers have a habit of trying it hit home with points and can come off a bit rough, but it's just because we've seen it all before and want to help. Good luck with your cycle.

przemosbabe

@jaztaz1‌ I guess I just feel like all I asked was what someone would suggest I ask the embryologist concerning my egg quality and what questions I should ask so I could fully understand where my embryos are at by day 3. You have to ask the right questions to get satisfying answers, kwim? Poor egg quality has always been a concern of mine, this question has been in my mind for years. And since IVF is the only way you can find out about egg quality, and it is my first IVF, I want to learn as much I can since i have been waiting so long for this moment. The embryologists are the ones dealing with the eggs, sperm and embryos, so I don't understand why it's not a good idea to question them while I can. I do have a different set of questions for the RE, but why not ask the embryologist directly when these particular questions I have now relate only the eggs and embryos? Like for example, I have read the follicular fluid around the egg retrived can look yucky, which could indicate the egg is not the greatest. Like I have questions that the embryologist woulld know becsuse they write down what the observe. It's kinda like doctors do know about drugs and stuff, but the best person to ask is actually the pharmacist. I also don't want to seem ungrateful, but I just don't see how anything pbgle said was valid at this point, when I haven't said anything to suggest it was the RE that was the problem, and nothing she said pertained to my actually question. I feel like I asked a very specific question, and she just kinda jumped in and said " I don't know girl, but I would go to a different RE".... I'm like, what???? I just asked what I should ask the embryologist .....? And I didn't provide any information at all that would suggest it was the RE , so I'm over here like really??? Many girls at clinics all over the world do have some immature eggs retrieved, even really young girls. She only said that because she herself chose not to go there for her own reasons, and then she apologized for her comments....which if she didnt feel would maybe offend, she would not have apologized. Like maybe if this had happend to me several times with the same RE then yeah I could understand the suggestion. I don't feel like I went off, I was just shocked really and was kinda like ' What the heck was that' ? I will definitely ask the RE about the immature eggs, but right now my concern is the mature eggs that fertilized ( which all 4 did) and the embryos. Anyways this is all turning into a dispute that is really not necessary and I feel this thread is suddenly trashed I really really don't want to fight and argue with anyone when all I want to do is stay positive and learn as much as I can from this first IVF and then hopefully help other ladies where I can. My experience here has been positive up until this thread and I would just like to put this in the past.

ExoticAntibiotic

After reading many of your posts, I get the feeling that you have no trust in your RE and his methods, so @pblge‌'s advice doesn't seem that wild to me.

pblge

Oh, wow. I had worried that my tone might have been a bit too harsh or negative, but I had no idea it would set off this kind of a kerfuffle.

@przemosbabe - Please know that my response was meant to be helpful. Perhaps someone else will give you the specific answer you're looking for. Best of luck in your cycle.

@IFinTN, @jaztaz1, and @ExoticAntibiotic- Thanks, ladies. Mad love to you all!

jaztastic

@pblge internet tone is hard lol...Plus we've been here long enough to know you meant no harm.

przemosbabe

@IFnTN I am asking you from the bottom of my heart to please just stop. She made comments that did not pertain to the question asked and I thought that was rude and that was it. That is all there is to it, and I may be wrong but I feel you're instigating at this point since you haven't actually commented on the question i had itself. I mean no offense, that is just the impression I am getting. I was only trying to explain to jaztaz why I took offense. I wasn't really looking for more argument or advise from you, but thank you very kindly anyways. @ExoticAntibiotic‌ I really don't know why you would presume that, but I am asking a lot of questions about this whole process in general to my RE, the nurses, and ladies online because this is a learning process and I want to understand everything fully. I do ask my doctor until I get an explanation I am happy with, but I feel the ladies on here also have useful information. I'm sorry if wanting to understand is coming across as mistrust. I assure you this is not the case. I want to educate myself as much as possible in case I have to do this again. I have questions for the doctors with all medical things in my life. It's just who I am. I have only posted questions on here trying to gather information to get an idea of how things go in the IVF world. I haven't really posted any questions asking if my doctor was doing the right or wrong thing, so i dont understand where you would get that Idea from, but i do realize that when you dont know someone and cant read there tone, you would naturally interpret things the way you interpret them, and that is OK. The only thing I have disagreed on with my doctor was triggering early. Many ladies have questions about what is going on in their cycles. If you read the posts I have been making, you probably missed the ones where I said I was happy with the clinic I am at. --------- The bottom line is, I asked a question about what someone would ask the Embryologist if they could so i could learn as much as possible about my eggs and embryos. I thought it was a pretty straight forward question, but perhaps adding details in my question confused some. I was just trying to put a clear picture out there. The response I got from that particular user was offensive to me, and made me upset when I was actually doing pretty good today, because what was said had nothing to do with my question, and was only said because she herself chose not to go my clinic, and she had no basis that had to do with me and my experience for making the comments she did. I thought it was a little premature to be saying such things when I have offered no information to where one would conclude its time for a new RE. I also want to say that I am also under the care of a reproductive immunologist and I am being looked after by both doctors and they are working as a team. I feel like I am I good hands as of right now. My problem right now with using FSH stimulants seems to be that I am stimming very quickly, and during my IUI with FSH, I actually ovulated one of the follicles after 6 days! I made my RE aware of this before I started this IVF cycle, and he switched the protocol that they originally had me on. He put me on the best drug there is for preventing premature ovulation ( cetrotide is the best I have been told). While I am disappointed with the way things went, it is still information that I am happy to have so that my next cycle can be better. I am looking forward to and grateful of the information I will get in the days to come. I have got some ideas as to what I should ask the embryologist and I am grateful to the ladies who gave me those ideas. I am feeling a big attacked, and so I'm just going to stay off this board for awhile because I really don't want to be upset right now. Whether you feel it warranted for me to be upset is irrelevant IFnTN. You dont know someones life, someones story, how they are feeling etc. I am upset regardless, and so I'm just going to log off and come back maybe in the future. I've been lurking here since I was 23 years old and it has helped me so much and I just want to thank all the ladies who have helped me through my first IVF experience. Hopefully I won't have to come back at all! Goodnight everyone

missmarypoppins

I think you should stop and think about why you like this online community more than others you've visited. We really are a tight knit group. It's hard when someone who has been a member for a long time and who has offered immense support to us all is called rude when @pblge‌ was just trying to be helpful. I don't think her comments were offensive. If you are happy with your care and have no intention of changing REs you could have just said "thanks but I'm actually happy with my RE now." Keep in mind that we all have each other's best interests in mind and @pblge‌ was really just trying to look out for you.

przemosbabe

Actually I feel that avoiding something that is upsetting a person is very reasonable. There is no drama to it, it's simply eliminating unnecessary stress . I wasn't being dramatic by respectfully asking you to stop. I am not " acting" any way....I really just truly wanted everyone to understand why I was bothered by that comment. I know that this is the Internet and not everyone will understand my explanation of why I felt that way, and that is completely OK... We are all strangers after all. I just need to step away from the forum in general and accept that whatever is going to happen is going to happen. I have learned a lot from my posts and I am grateful, but I really just need to go to sleep and just hope I get pregnant from my transfer. Much love and thanks to everyone and goodnight for real this time

AMShark

I'm relatively new here, so I'm not going to take any sides.  @pblge & @przemosbabe - I've seen wonderful posts from both of you, and feel that you both have good intentions on this site.

As I posted before, I don't have much advice for the embryologist, but as for your question, I think it might be best to re-post it as a new thread.  At this point, the conversation outside of the original question has proven too distracting.

przemosbabe

@AMShark‌ I agree with you. Thank you so much for your advice. I gave up and reposted this question on a different site...l just wanted to move on...anywas I am armed with questions for the embryologist tomorrow morning! She is gonna hate me lol. Ill come back and update for the lurkers. I just hate when I find threads that relate to questions I have at the time and they are not updated! I have received many encouraging PM's and I love all you ladies for your kind words. I slept well last night and hopefully will again tonight Ill be back on Saturday to update

przemosbabe

Update for the lurkers and Internet scrollers (lol) Today I transffered one 4AB blastocysts. Ill be back at a later time to update about good questions to ask the embryologist on day 3 and day 5 and all other details, and then ill let you guys know if I got pregnant or not from this cycle. If any of you are in my position, don't get discouraged. You don't want 15 embryos sitting in a freezer. I think 1-4 embryos is good. It's just so scary when you only get 4 eggs, but those 4 eggs they did get were healthy and did create life ( if you believe life starts at conception). A woman can have 30 eggs and none of them fertilize. A woman can have 20 embryos live to day 3 and none make it to blastocysts at all. A woman can have blastocyst, but they can all be genetically abnormal. Don't ever get discouraged or let anyone on the Internet, in real life, at the doctors ( my doctors office was great ) office bring you down. If you are reading this post, you have probably seen this a million times before, but it only takes one