Breast feeding in front of family

Csltdk

I just had an immature giggle over "anal inspection"


I'm still giggling

TurtleMonsters

knittylady said:

Is it your family that is uncomfortable or are you assuming that they are uncomfortable, OP? 

I am kind of assuming. But when it first came up, I was told there was a rocking chair up in a spare room that was the "grandbaby" room at my aunts house. I assumed they didn't want me in front of them at first. However, I'm wondering if I misunderstood and if that was for MY comfort.

Csltdk said:

I'll BF in front of everyone with the exception of my MIL. Mostly because she will say I'm doing it wrong and have a fear she'll try to bf my baby herself.

^^ do we share a  mother in law? That's the reason I happily went to my bedroom to feed DS! I tried to stay in there as long as I could.

TurtleMonsters

cakebatter27 said:

If someone isn't comfortable with their breasts out in front of their closest friends, I'm interested in how modest they will be with their vagina stretched to the max in front of a doctor, nurses, their partner and possibly medical students. I understand wearing a cover if YOU feel more comfortable. But honestly you and LO are the only ones to be concerned with. Feeding and eating is very natural. And if people are seeing your whole nipple, then you're doing it wrong anyways. My mom, MIL and all my friends with babies except one breastfeed/fed. So it's pretty normal for me to be comfortable around it. And I've heard it's not always easy so I'll take any help I can get from someone being supportive.

I had no issues with having the doc, surgeon, tons of nurses, etc, see the outside of my vag or all my guts during the CS, male of female. Nor at any internal before- birth is like a big long internal. They've seen 1,000's of va-j-j's mine certainly won't stand out to them.

I definitely plan to use the sling as a cover, I wouldn't feel comfortable until I got a feel for how they responded the concept in general. One cousin acts like a 12 year old, so I expect he'll have something to say and I just don't care, he's an idiot.

cakebatter27

ghostof5letters said:

cakebatter27 said:

ghostof5letters said:

cakebatter27 said:

If someone isn't comfortable with their breasts out in front of their closest friends, I'm interested in how modest they will be with their vagina stretched to the max in front of a doctor, nurses, their partner and possibly medical students.

You think I should be more comfortable with my breasts out in front of my dad and brother than I am with my doctor?

I'm more comfortable with my boobs out than my vagina in front of people I hardly know. I'm very close with my family so I could care less if my dad saw my boobs while feeding his grandchild.

To me, boobs aren't sexual at all during breastfeeding. ..They're a source of nutrients. I think the issue is it makes people uncomfortable because they view them as fun bags and not a baby's food supply. It totally will depend on each person. I find it as whatever. Someone we barely knew breastfed at my sister's party last weekend in front of 20 people. She didn't make a big deal of it so it wasn't a big deal. And she used no cover and I never saw anything. And I was definitely watching because it's something I hope to be doing soon.

I think the more casual and relaxed you are the more comfortable everyone else is. I've been very upfront this entire pregnancy it is what I'll be doing openly.

My body and medical professionals is nbd at all. Boobs, vagina, butt, I've exposed it all, it's nbd. 

When I was breastfeeing (before going to EP) it took a lot to get situated in the beginning and I wasn't comfortable getting into position with the likes of my dad and brother in the room. 

I'd much rather have an anal inspection with a doctor and med student and nurse, than haphazardly try to get situated breastfeeding a newborn as a ftm with my dad and brother in the room. 

Lol anal inspection.

I agree, at first for a ftm it won't be easy. But I'm going to try to be as casual and relaxed as possible. I know it's NBD for my dad and I don't have a brother. I think if I approach it as natural most anyone who will be around me a lot will realize it's not a big deal either. I'm hoping. :crosses fingers: it definitely helps everyone I know who will see me BFing is cool with it to begin with. I don't have any asshole relatives or friends who I'd do it in front of to begin with.

Salsera29

My sister leaves the room, my cousin leaves the room, and I will definitely leave the room. Honestly I don't feel like I will be comfortable nursing in front of anyone but DH. It's just how we are, I guess. "I'll take 'Stilted WASPS for $1000' please, Alex."

darkangel42

*for clarity (I was extremely tired when I posted)

I'll ask the women-folk of the family and closer female friends if they mind and if they do I'll use a cover, with the men-folk and less close friends the cover will be a given. With only women I'm comfortable with present, I'd rather not use a cover in July and August on account of the heat which I know my SiL understands because she had 2 summer babies. 

Regardless of how everyone feels, I am still not leaving the room. A cover is a perfectly reasonable compromise.

mamakiss

I plan on doing whatever I want. I don't imagine myself comfortable without a cover in front of some family members, especially when we're still getting the hang of it, but whatever works for us will go when we're with family as well. No one would dare say anything because SO would speak up where I wouldn't

iris427

I think the key here is people should just do what makes them comfortable in the moment, be it cover, no cover, or finding a private room.  I've done all of the above when breastfeeding my kids, depending on the situation.  

And yeah, I'm definitely more apt to seek out privacy with a newborn who hasn't figured out latching yet.  That's more challenging than an older infant that you can just pop on the boob in literally a split second.

chevronseven

aliletz said:

My hospital room, and my house = my tits go where they please, at least when it comes to feeding time.  If anyone feels uncomfortable they're welcome to leave the room or my house entirely.  That said, I'll probably use a cover of some sort as long as LO will have it.

Haven't finished the thread, but I agree with this. I won't allow myself to feel uncomfortable in my own home, but I also think that goes both ways in that I would respect others' right to feel comfortable in their own home. If we're visiting somewhere, I would probably ask the host or hostess if they mind me feeding him there or if they would prefer me to step out. I plan to wear a cover in public but if I forget it or if LO doesn't like it then I won't.

MTAtlanta

I felt the exact same way with ds! Sometimes it was just easier to go in another room, but that can get old and inconvenient after a few months, plus when you're slinking away at someone elses house it seems like you're doing something gross and dirty.

Plus no one in my fam bf back in the day. They're all like, "bottles are easier so everyone can feed him!"

I ended up using a cover when at familys house but it was always a little strange when in the room with my dad or inlaws. I always felt they inlaws esp thought i was doing something much too primal and impolite for modern society. :-\

Sorry for punctuation errors. My phone is not cooperating.

rheard3582

I was so conservative about this with DS1. It really stressed me out. This time I am not going to care as much. I will try to be conservative but if they see a tit in my house whilemI'm breast feeding.. well tough titties

mrscutforth

TurtleMonsters said:

 I had the hardest time in front of family. It worked well as an excuse to get away from some of the family members I can't stand, on one particular side. 

***stuck in gray***

This is me. 

I pumped and only felt comfy enough to have blanket draped over me while people were visiting at my house. If they are uncomfortable with it, they can leave. It's not easy for me either to BF/pump either as I have big boobs and not easily concealable. Also trying to her somewhere in my house while people are visiting is going to be hard as I would do the BF/pumping in DH and I's room but that's up the stairs and having a csec/tubal is going to be hard to get up the stairs for a few days. I'm secretly hoping that when we have my inlaws visit, I will still be in the hospital for most of their visit so I don't have to deal with them. 

loulou1212

I worried about this a lot at first, then almost not at all. Turns out everyone in my family can deal and it'such more comfortable to nurse without a cover. That said, I also hope to become proficient at nursing in the carrier so that I can still care for my toddler and be more mobile.