Talking

mnj05

We had H's 15 month well check yesterday and the pedi is concerned about his lack of words. There's been no change since 12 months. He can momma and dada but not on purpose. He says bye bye but not really with purpose either.

I try to read to him and he throws the book or throws a fit when I try to turn the page. We've been trying naming body parts but he smiles and walks away, same with animals. The pedi wants to re-evaluate in a month and possibly send him to an early childhood interventionist.

Does/has anyone had a late bloomer in the talking sense? I haven't really been concerned but now I'm kinda stressing. Since birth we've been to five specialists and I'm so tired of doctors and appointments I could scream.

TJ1979

E was a slow starter. But once she started with the nanny and the little boy who is one year older, her vocabulary exploded into full blown sentences (from maybe 10 total words before.)
Does he have much interaction with older more verbal kids?

mnj05

He did in daycare but starting yesterday, he's home with me full time. Not many of the other kids in his room (12-24 months) talk, at least not that I've heard. There are three others that have birthdays within weeks of his that aren't talking either, and one of them still doesn't walk yet.

It's just frustrating and I feel like I'm in a race against the clock. It doesn't help that I've had this horrible cough for a week and the more I talk, the more I cough so working with him right now isn't going well.

mnj05

I certainly hope so. We talk to him constantly and not using baby noises or words, but the same way DH and I talk to each other. Thanks for the reassurance!

amd1982

My mother in law tells me that my husband didn't speak until he was two. Also my older cousin now in his forties LITERALLY did not speak one word until he was three. All he did was point. And coming from an old school Greek family they just accommodated him and never forced him to speak. And honestly? Now he won't shut up! Haha. I'm not telling you to relax bushes I understand how difficult that is. But I think pedis tend to be real stress cases about things and everything is "on average." Well if every kid was on average we wouldn't have geniuses right? I think you're doing everything right. Pick a few words that you want him to learn. For example our twins found the word car, dog, light very easy to recognize so they really wanted to say it. Just keep repeating over and over. Look at the car. The car goes beep. The dog goes woof. Etc Good luck I'm sure everything will work out!

Ruthie04

It does sound like you are doing everything right and I do agree that a child will develop at his/her own pace. With that being said, the social worker in me is a HUGE proponent of early intervention. My boys always have the minimum number of words required by the pedi, despite their amazing receptive language skills. I believe the pedi was looking for 5-10 words at 15 mo and 15-20 at 18 mo. And, now they are really starting to fall behind. They just aren't progressing at the same rate as their peers. I'll be honest- I feel like some of their delay is related to my parenting (not pushing them to use a word to get a need met since I know what they want). I just ordered a couple books written by SLPs to see if I can adjust my approach when working with them. DH and I are quick talkers and we both tend to mumble. That's something we really need to correct.

I'm going to give it a month of some very deliberate work before speaking to a friend who does the intakes for early intervention. We are starting to see some increases in tantruming due to communication issues and I'm really interested in receiving some feedback in what I can do to support their language. My sister pushed off an intake for my nephew and he struggled for years when the issue could have been corrected much earlier with an early referral. My other nephew was seen early and only needed services for a couple of months.

Truly, I wouldn't say I am worried about them and I don't think you should be all that concerned either. I really believe they will catch up and we may be at the precipice of the big leap in language that so many talk about. I just want to be proactive to make things easier on the boys and our family. If your pedi is ready for a referral, I'd encourage you to do it. Most EI professionals will come to your home and they should work with you on a schedule that meets your family's needs. Lots of children actually enjoy speech therapy- plenty of one on one attention and games!

mnj05

@Ruthie04 - I think part of our issue is our parenting as well. He says "ma, ma, ma" and looks at what he wants and it's easy for us to just know and give him what he wants or needs.

DH didn't start talking until 2-ish and my cousin didn't start until age 3. The teacher in me is torn, the parent in me (who has been to at least one doctor's appointment every month for over a year for H) is just tired. I know kids develop differently, I see it every year. Based on that alone, I'm not concerned right now. I've also got friends of friends who are speech therapists that say pediatricians in general are pushing speech too hard too young because they are being blamed for problems down the road that weren't caught. I completely understand that and trying to prevent the struggle for older kids.

I guess I'm just thinking I may hold off until September when he's 18 months; if he's still behind at that point, go see someone then. He may not have his explosive vocabulary leap until 17 months and that would be fine with me, I'd just rather not get caught up in going to a therapist should that happen.

queenbone

DS2 has a speech disorder which began as a speech delay. He had eating issues too (diagnosed with a visual food sensitivity ~18mo) and that was really my early focus more than the speech. I really had to push the pedi to get a referal to an OT to work on his food issues and the clinic also had speech paths so we got a little early work with that. One thing that helped was they taught me/him some simple sign language which helped to facilitate some of his needs since he had trouble expressing them. 

Similar to PP, my son had excellent receptive language (he could follow multi step requests ie if you want more milk go get your cup in the other room, bring it back to me and I'll fill it up with more) but his expressive language was not good. I don't know if it helped or hindered, but I knew where his brother was at the same age. Anyway I pushed to get him evaluated for EI which was very helpful. A speech path came to our home 1x per week. I then had to have him re-evaluated at age 3 to qualify for early childhood special ed. That lasts from 3-5 so he won't need to be tested again for a while and will get him into kindergarten. I'm hoping by then he won't need services anymore. He has made so much improvement through treatment and age I think. His speech path still comes to the house weekly, but once he starts pre school in the fall she will meet with him in that setting instead. 

None of this is to imply your LO will need services, but I just wanted to describe how ours works to show that isn't so scary and is pretty convenient. I'm glad we started it when we did, I felt very unqualified to 'fix' the issues myself. GL, and hopefully you won't need services!

Ruthie04

@mnj05- The speech thing has been on my mind a lot lately and I kind of got caught up in my own thoughts. I'm really sorry if I came across as an alarmist! And, I definitely hear you on the specialist thing. There was a time when I felt pretty discouraged and overwhelmed with the cornucopia of appointments and medical issues and it would have led me to steer clear of adding another professional to our schedule (in fact, I did say no to one referral from the pedi!). I also think 15 months is pretty young to be terribly concerned about true speech issues. We are at 20 months with behavioral issues, so my urgency is definitely different.

It sounds like you are doing a great job and I think you deserve a lot of credit for giving so much time and thought to this topic.

mdiblasi10

You are Momma and Momma knows best It sounds like you are doing everything you can at this point. It is pretty crazy how fast things can change, so he just might start picking up more words soon. Good luck! 

mnj05

Thanks everyone for your insight. I'm just going to keep chugging along and see what happens!

Dragonfly1226

I don't know what is "normal" for that age, but the best thing you can do is talk to him. Narrate everything you do, he does... Just chat with him like you might with a friend. And try not to stress. There is such a wide range of what is normal. He might take off any day.

fullfhope

M is almost 16 months now and still doesn't really have many words. Dada, bye and hi. Some random words that may just have been flukes. Dr. Wasn't concerned because she said she could tell that M was understanding us, like when she asked M to hand her something and M did. I've heard that a few times now, the importance of LO showing that they understand us and can maybe even follow directions.

I'm sorry you are feeling down about this. It is so hard to not worry about the developments. Good luck.

ETA I took the time to read other responses and see that these ladies know a whole lot more than I do (as always!) So feel free to ignore my blather except for the good luck wishes

mnj05

I'm glad you brought up following directions @fullfhope‌. H does that pretty well so I know he understands what we say. That makes me feel better that it's a good sign.

pb_bride

mnj05 - I know how you feel.  M had ZERO words at 15m (he had 2 animal sounds).  The pedi wasn't worried at all.  I was kind of stressed b/c M's play date friends (same age) are mostly early talkers and they had lots of words already.  I was *that close* to calling EI.  Having said that, I know M had excellent receptive language - he could point to most body parts and many objects in books (in 2 languages - we are bilingual at home).  At that time, I told myself I'd wait and see what happens at 18m, b/c as you already know, 15m is really kind of young.  In the meantime, I started teaching M sign language and he picked that up VERY quickly, learning 1 sign a day or more.

At 18m, he still only had FOUR words and SEVEN animal sounds, but he had THREE DOZEN signs.  He was able to communicate with me by signing and didn't seem frustrated at all.  The pediatrician again was not concerned at all - he said he wouldn't worry until at least M is 2.  Since I felt like there is some progress, I told myself I'd give him another month or two.

M is almost 19m now.  He has learned nine new words (and 5 new signs) since.  I am still a bit concerned but I'm more relaxed now, seeing that he's learning more as days go on.  He is also "talking" more - mostly gibberish, but it sounds like sentences to me.  At this point, I think as long as he is learning more words around the same speed, I won't worry.  But red flags would be no new words/plateauing, and no two-word phrases by age 2.

GL!