Court tomorrow

babymama619

Tomorrow morning is the first court date to determine paternity. I haven't seen BD since about a week after conception and haven't heard from him since a week after I found out I was pregnant. DD is now almost 7 months old. I'm not really even sure what to expect and I'm just totally not into actually seeing him...or having him around DD. I just can't stand not knowing what kind of involvement he will or won't want. I feel like I'm going to throw up.

babymama619

I guess they are going to do the DNA test tomorrow if he asks for it, which I'm assuming he will. I have to bring the baby and I wish I didn't. I was really hoping they would send us to a clinic or something separately. It just sucks that this guy is basically a stranger and he'll have rights to my daughter. But on the other hand I can't not seek child support or at least say I gave him the opprotunity to be involved when she eventually asks about him.

babymama619

No lawyers yet. If he wants to pursue any sort of visitation we will go through mediation and at that point I'll hire a lawyer. I met with one while I was pregnant and decided to wait and see. If BD wants nothing to do with LO then I'll petition the court for sole custody. 

freeatlast2014

Good luck. You are doing the right thing IMO. Your daughter will ask one day for sure. And you will have a good explanation for her about how you did all you could. Regardless of how it turns out.

runningmama22

Thinking about you. I too feel like I'll be sharing custody with a stranger (I dated my baby's father for like 2 months and still feel like I know nothing about him aside from his substance abuse issues)... You're doing the right thing, hang in there. Not knowing is a crappy feeling. So is being in a courtroom. I had to be in one to get a PFA against BD for threatening my life the other week... Also felt like id throw up. Just know the immediate pukey anxiety feeling will pass, and hopefully mediation will be just what you need to come up with a good custody agreement. I hope everything works out for you like you would like it to.

MinnesotaMomma91

Fingers crossed for court tomorrow

20thirteen

Good luck!

inthelost

Did you go through DHR? I did. The first meeting at family court, they issued the DNA test, and then told us to come back three and a half months later for results. I know: they take their sweet time don't they? Good luck....

eg214

I hear ya. BD isn't a stranger to me, but he is a total stranger to LO who has never seen him...yet I am being fought for custody and visitation. The man is sick in the head, literally. It sucks that he was violent with me in the past, is a fricking lunatic, and has rights to her.

Let us know how it went! 

septmom11

Hope all went well, i had to go through the same thing to get child support.  Just know that Child support does not equal custody or visitations.  he will have to file that separatly