Baby Shower Advice

lisalynnmama

Hi Ladies!  Happy Friday!

So, I need some help/advice with regard to my baby shower.  Some history:  I already have one son and we are now expecting twins.  Techs are 90% sure it is two girls and my mother REALLY wants to throw me a baby shower.  I already had a shower when DS was born but my SIL was pregnant at the same time, so my mother gave each of us a shower and did not get to "give me the shower she really wanted" (her words, not mine).  Plus, she is so excited about the prospect of two little grand girls that she can hardly stand it!    Anyway, in the last few months my father has been diagnosed with a rare form of lymphoma and has been in the hospital receiving chemo.  Due to his illness, she does not want to have the shower at her house (which totally makes sense to me and I am not upset about at all).  

So, here is the question.  Mom has mentioned having it at my house for convenience sake.  I am not opposed to having it at my house, but would people think it was weird?  Most people who will be invited will be family so they will know about my dad's illness and it would be easy to explain.  I just hate that I feel like I would have to explain why it was at my house to any friends I invited to assuage my guilt over having it at my house and not wanting to seem greedy or gift grabby.  She has also mentioned having it at another location but I would hate for her to have to pay for a place since they are already going to be getting hit with tons of medical bills. I want her to have fun planning it and all of that and I want to make it easy for her.  

Sorry this is so long.  I just have feeeeeeeeelings about it.  So, would it be tacky to have it at my house?  What am I to do?

emoxymoose

I personally don't think so, but I also am warning you against posting this on the baby shower board because they would love to sink their teeth into it. Anyways, it's an extenuating circumstance and I'm sure everyone would understand. If anyone does think it's tacky they probably won't come, and who cares, you don't need them anyways. Relax, have fun, and enjoy the shower.

jess123456

I am so sorry to hear about your father.

I think having it at your house is totally fine as long as you are comfortable with that. As others have said, family and friends should understand and this is your day. Having the RSVP's go to your mom will tell everyone who is hosting it I believe.

mb314

I agree - if your mom sends out the invites and takes the RSVPs, I don't see it as a problem to have the shower at your house.  During the shower, just make sure you behave like the honoree and not the hostess.  I would hope your guests will understand, particularly since your dad is sick.

And I also agree don't post this on the baby shower Nazi board.  Those ladies are cray-cray. 

sweetbabyrahe

I think this is reasonable and your family will understand. We did this for a cousin that was having twins. It really saved her having to cart all of the gifts home. We threw it for her, helped clean her house, decorated, and acted as hostesses. It worked out very well.

cindyNmark2010

If they're close enough to be attending your shower then they're close enough to understand your situation and why it would be at your house.  I don't think it's tacky at all.  BONUS...no lugging all those gifts from one location to another.

absolutelymaybe

I say go for it! And I don't think you should have to explain why the shower is at your house, either. It's not like you're throwing the shower for yourself -- and that should be pretty clear if your mom is handling all the details.

ccam

As long as it clearly comes across as hosted by your Mom and not you, I don't see anything wrong with having it at home.  I'm sorry about your Dad and I'm assuming most of your family knows the situation and would also understand.

silverwings72

Is agee with the the PP about not posting this in the shower forum. Those women are evil. I think they have gotten a little crazy in baby shower etiquette. They have all kinds of crazy, ridiculous rules that prevent people from having fun together and bonding over the new LO. I believe you have every right to feel comfortable in using your own home. Frankly, if people feel the need to judge you, then they have no business celebrating with you and your family. I say let your Mama have fun hosting and enjoy your day celebrating your little girls.

Nfranco973

Both my showers thrown by my sisters, have been in my house. I do it for comfortability purposes. I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

Jpinky9

I went to my friends baby shower in the fall and two of her other friends were hosting it and sent out the invites. They did all the decorating and food and everything. I never once thought it was odd that it was at her place. I thought it was great that she didn't have to load all the gifts into her car and take the home!

mander82

I always said I would have my baby shower at my house so I wouldn't have to haul everything home afterwards.

thats not possible for me because we don't have alot of parking at my house,  also,  I will have more people than will comfortably fit in my house.....I don't think there is anything wrong with it though if it will work for you.

Dimples0101

First, so sorry to hear about your dad. Second, I agree with pp. I think that if you are okay with having the shower at your house, that's totally fine. Like people already said, your family and friends will understand why your mother doesn't want to have it at her house. Just have the RSVPs go to her since she is hosting.

AlliJeee

Im so sorry to hear about your Dad - Hope he is doing better and on the road to recovery! 

As for your shower - you and your mom should do whats best for you!  Your friends and family will know and understand about your circumstances, and anyone else - who cares!  

tiersa_smith

Sorry to hear about your dad.  I don't understand why people even think that far when it comes to baby showers. It is all about welcoming the little ones and helping make the load of the parents a little lighter,  Its a celebration and should only be about you and your belly and not where it is held or even whose idea it is.  I agree since your mom is having it she should be the hostess and arrange everything else and yes all the items will already be in the house! AWESOME!  

lisalynnmama

Ladies, thanks for all of your helpful advice!  I was hesitant to post this on the Baby Shower board for the reasons some of you listed.  They can be a little scary and I am too sensitive to handle meanness right now.  

You have made me feel better about having it at my house!  I agree that most people will probably think nothing of it since the invitations will come from my mother, she will be listed as hostess, and the RSVPs will go to her.  

Several of you mentioned not having to lug stuff back home -- that is definitely a plus!  

Seriously, thank you.  I feel 100% better about this now.