This Duggar gem

Mandmeesh

https://www.yahoo.com/tv/news/duggars-visit-fertility-doctor-explore-expanding-brood-19-200400449.html

I didn't realize Michelle is 47!

Littledeer84

Whoa, you would think she would be glad to be done! That said I do know someone (in his 60s now) whose mother was 48 when he was conceived. Total ooops baby...he has a brother that is more than 25 years older than him!

Rrrrrachel

The headline is a little misleading because it makes it sound like she's actively seeking fertility treatments, but then from the body of the article it sounds like that's not the case?

sarenu1

Rrrrrachel said:

The headline is a little misleading because it makes it sound like she's actively seeking fertility treatments, but then from the body of the article it sounds like that's not the case?

I thought the same. It sounded like she was finding out information for if she got pregnant again. Since she would be considered high risk.

Mandmeesh

Yeah. She did seem to be getting more information. But come on-47 years old and two babies ago was born three months premature (healthy 4yo now) and she lost her last baby. Seems super risky.

Rrrrrachel

I'm sure it's a publicity stunt.

CLLDLL

They had a clip on last night's episode.  I watched it while nursing G.  They basically went in to find out if she is in pre-menopause or not.  They've been not preventing since her miscarriage and haven't gotten pregnant.  She did ask they Dr. if she was doing anything wrong & or if there was anything more she could do to get pregnant.  They obviously edited it for TV impact, but just my interpretation of the meeting was that they still want another baby, the Dr. warned them of all the risks and told them they weren't doing anything "wrong", and she had blood drawn to see if she's pre-menopausal or not.  No fertility treatments.  

Into+the+Kitty

I just can't even.

unaveragejane

I'm not a Duggar fan b/c I just don't know enough about them to support or judge their decisions and lifestyle, but I do think that it must be difficult for someone who has so much of her identity wrapped up in having children to come to grips with the end of her childbearing years.

TJ1979

Okay, so I get how this sounds, and how the media hype is playing it out.  BUT... I have to say that I give her credit if she is honestly there to find out whether or not she is in the right health to carry a child safely for both her and the child.  If the doc told her she was pre-menopausal and it would be a bad idea, and they kept trying anyway, then that would be jacked up.  But if the doc says she's fine and to go ahead, or if the doc says she's not fine, and they abstain, then that is actually responsible.  (ish, other than the whole 19 other kids things.)

Into+the+Kitty

I really doubt they would abstain. It goes against the quiverful ideologies. Plus CLLDLL just said she was asking if there was more they could be doing to get pregnant.

Pursuing a pregnancy at her age after the outcomes (though thankfully one of her children is still living) of her last two pregnancies is selfish and stupid.

After 45, the miscarriage rate jumps to over 50%. Fifty fucking percent. Some studies have even showed the rate to be as high as 75%. And that doesn't even take into account poor egg quality, much less the maternal uterine condition (which after 21+ pregnancies is not in prime condition as it is).

This is not someone who got married late in life or had major difficulties getting pregnant and is pursing the only biological option of having children at an AMA, she has NINETEEN living children. They are selfish. And fucking stupid.

Mandmeesh

AFwifelife said:

Yayy another Duggar debate!!

what is this guy from? lol

TJ1979

Don't get me wrong ITK, I agree with you 100%.  But IF she were actually getting solid advice and listening to it, it would be responsible.  So I do tip my hat to that.  I guess I'm just naively optimistic and hoping that they are being told the truth about fertility at her age, and will listen and respect what they are told.  KWIM?

Rrrrrachel

Even if the doctor said it was dangerous they would keep trying and say it was in God's hands or something. That's my bet, at least. I'm sure plenty of doctors have told her having so many babies so close together is not a medically sound idea.

Into+the+Kitty

Rrrrrachel said:

Even if the doctor said it was dangerous they would keep trying and say it was in God's hands or something. That's my bet, at least. I'm sure plenty of doctors have told her having so many babies so close together is not a medically sound idea.

This is definitely true. Their basic belief is that when you're married you need to regularly have sex and be open to having god giving you more children, trusting his plan. There is no way that they will abstain, and birth control/NFP etc are all also major nos.

blondolphn

Um ccant she just enjoy her grand babies?

SkyBee

I can totally understand wanting to even it out at 20.    Haha

Amores0121

We were just discussing this at work and figured out she has been PG for 16 years of her life. I Feel like for her it is probably like an addiction at this point. Her whole identity has been getting KU and having babies and now she can't do it anymore (or is having difficulty) and she probably is having a hard time dealing with that.

But yeah, so why don't you just enjoy the kids you have and your grandkids!!

At this point, I think God has blessed you enough.

MrsRahl

Into+the+Kitty said:

Rrrrrachel said:

Even if the doctor said it was dangerous they would keep trying and say it was in God's hands or something. That's my bet, at least. I'm sure plenty of doctors have told her having so many babies so close together is not a medically sound idea.

This is definitely true. Their basic belief is that when you're married you need to regularly have sex and be open to having god giving you more children, trusting his plan. There is no way that they will abstain, and birth control/NFP etc are all also major nos.

If you've read their books and/or watched their shows, you will read/see several instances that they have said they (Michelle and Jim Bob) chose that belief, but do not expect their children to all follow that same path and allow them to make their own decision on that. That has also been said about saving their first kiss for marriage as well (just throwing that one out there for even more fun debate lol)  Obviously growing up in a family with those beliefs, I'm sure most will adopt it, but they aren't forcing it on them (or so they say.)  This has also been said by the Bates family and Anna's family as well.  Although you probably won't believe this but "The Duggars write in their second book, A Love That Multiplies: "Even though Wikipedia and some Internet blogs report that we are part of a QuiverFull movement, we are not. We are simply Bible-believing Christians who desire to follow God's Word and apply it to our lives" (page 92)."   Take that for what it is worth, although I agree it does sound like they are quiverfull people.   I'm not sure why so many people are getting so upset by the fact she could miscarry and want to keep trying.  It's her body and her choice.  Unless you aren't pro-choice then... and that is a whole other debate...

Mandmeesh

My Amish neighbors have six kids. They are not forced to become a part of the church system or beliefs either. If they choose not to adopt the beliefs of their parents they're never allowed to contact their family again. So, no, not FORCED to believe one way, but they're not shown any other way either. And if you don't "choose" it, you lose your family

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Amores0121

SecretAgentKate said:

and since reproductive rights of women seem to be on the chopping block today, what are your thoughts on this: https://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/05/21/rinat_dray_sues_for_forced_c_section_says_doctors_at_staten_island_university.html

(originally posted on my bmb by @zoegirltx)

Absolute bullshit. First off, they can't KNOW that a uterus is going to rupture. Either it's rupturing or it ruptured. Nobody knows if it's going to happen with certainty.  The article doesn't state if the baby's life was in danger or not. I'm sure if it was, the mom would have consented. If she did not consent, that is a serious violation of her rights.

jcwinsto

SecretAgentKate said:

and since reproductive rights of women seem to be on the chopping block today, what are your thoughts on this: https://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/05/21/rinat_dray_sues_for_forced_c_section_says_doctors_at_staten_island_university.html

(originally posted on my bmb by @zoegirltx)

If that truely is all the facts then it is kind of messed up.  It would be another story if there was evidence that her uterus was rupturing and she refused a cs.

SarahA918

SkyBee said:

I can totally understand wanting to even it out at 20.    Haha

Yeah the odd number would bother me too!

beccaxrad

Can you imagine how many disposable diapers that family has put into landfills??? Also, I will never understand why anyone would want to be pregnant that many times! I'm on my first and I am not a fan, but I am excited to be having a little!

csspencer

Mandmeesh said:

My Amish neighbors have six kids. They are not forced to become a part of the church system or beliefs either. If they choose not to adopt the beliefs of their parents they're never allowed to contact their family again. So, no, not FORCED to believe one way, but they're not shown any other way either. And if you don't "choose" it, you lose your family

Not sure how often you watch the show, or if you do at all...but they have a cousin, Amy, who does not follow their beliefs. She wears pants, dates, etc. they are very close to her, so obviously they don't "shun" someone who doesn't live their lifestyle.

Mandmeesh

I don't watch the show. I wonder how it would be without cameras rolling

Kelly11235

beccaxrad said:

Can you imagine how many disposable diapers that family has put into landfills??? Also, I will never understand why anyone would want to be pregnant that many times! I'm on my first and I am not a fan, but I am excited to be having a little!

From what I understand, they did use cloth diapers at least part of the time.  There was one episode of the show where they mention having to have the camera crew pick up disposables on their way in, but they were without power then.  No power = no washer = no clean diapers.  I believe the oldest son's wife also used cloth on their first born.

I've not watched the show in years, as we don't have cable tv.

N_Koz

SecretAgentKate said:

and since reproductive rights of women seem to be on the chopping block today, what are your thoughts on this: https://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/05/21/rinat_dray_sues_for_forced_c_section_says_doctors_at_staten_island_university.html

(originally posted on my bmb by @zoegirltx)

And now my blood is boiling. This hospital just shat on her rights and violated the law. I am sorry but you do not get to force someone to have surgery because you think it is best unless it is a true emergency ie her uterus had actually ruptured, and she is not conscious to give consent. This was wrong. On the same note if you make the decision to go against medical advice and have a bad outcome then you don't get to sue the hospital. Its called informed consent and they forgot the consent part.