Is anyone planning on having.....

mamatohne

I'm a cusp, Aquarius/ Pisces. When I was younger I was a typical Pisces. As an adult I'm a total Aquarius. But I'm still neurotic like Pisces can be.

Kristil2014

I would like them 18 to 24 months apart. But my DH keeps on saying he wants 4 kids and since this is our first, we better get going on it ASAP

GHMomRN

I'm a little late on this convo nor have I recently had a baby being mine are now 6 & almost 5, my boys are 20 months apart. At first it was a bit of a adjustment just cause my husband works all the time but now they are older I absolutely love the distance between them. Now baby #3 coming there will be a 5 1/2 yr and 7 yr distance that makes me nervous. Anything you decide will be fine the closer the better I think

mussalynn

mexinugget said:

This is our second. Our first just turned fourteen months. I always wanted my kids close in age like my sisters and i are. We started trying when number one was about eight our nine months. Took about four months to get pregnant, breastfeeding wacky cycles. After this one who knows. If i could I'd love five kids, but honestly i just don't know if i have the energy. I'm so much more exhausted this time around, prob from chasing a toddler. Also ds has hit a very difficult stage, so i'm thinking what the Hell did we get ourselves into haha. It will be wonderful i know.

This!  DS just turned 15 months, he will be 21 months when baby arrives.  We wanted them to be much closer together and started trying when he was 6 or 7 months but it took us 8 months to conceive, which was a surprise because we conceived DS on the first try!  He is also going through a difficult (for me) period being very clingy and needy, so now I'm like oh shit there's going to be two of these...!!!!!

jlove253

I'm so jealous of you ladies who didn't get AF for a while. I bled for 4ish weeks pp and then had two weeks off and AF came back. Boo.

We wanted to have kids close together, because we had that in our families growing up. I loved having a sister 21 months younger than me. But I puked my whole pregnancy with dd and this one is looking the same (diagnosed HG this time, and think I was last time too but was never orally given the diagnosis by my OB), and that makes it really hard to want to get pregnant again. Then right after DD was born DH herniated two discs in his spine and one year after that had spinal surgery. Between DH's injuries and surgery/recovery, it made the physical act of getting pregnant really difficult. When LO is born they will be 3 years younger than DD. ALL that to say if things had been different we would have started trying pretty quickly for #2, and 3 years apart seems pretty far, but no sense in complaining right. Everything happens for a reason.

I say see how you feel about it at the end Kristy. DH and I both loved being close in age with our siblings, but the shortest either of our parents waited was 1 year before getting pregnant with the next.

jlaferne

Mine will be 16 months apart! We plan on trying for #3 as soon as we can again. I couldn't get pregnant before the 7 month post partum mark because of breastfeeding/cycle issues but I'm still breastfeeding and I got pregnant .

abbyful

This is baby #2 for us. DS turns 2 in August.

I wanted to have them even closer together, I wanted to get pregnant when DS was around 9-12 months old. But due to breastfeeding, my period didn't even come back until I stopped pumping; my first post-partum period was the week DS turned 1. I got pregnant again quickly, but then miscarriage diagnosed at 9.5 weeks (on Halloween last year, fun) and couldn't TTC again until January.

The verdict is still out on if there will be a baby #3, but if there is, the ideal plan would be same as my [failed] ideal plan was last time: it would be nice to start TTC when baby is about 9 months old.

Maelara

I say if you want to try for another, go for it! DD and this babe will only be 16 months apart but I'm strangely looking forward to it. I plan on wearing this new baby a lot and DD already walks so that won't ever be a problem. We are done after this one, it doesn't matter what the sex is. Pregnancy is very difficult for me (preaching to the choir!!) and I can't see myself doing this again. As for VBACS, my doctor is going to let me try (for now). That might change done the line but they are going to let me try even though these babies will only be 16 months apart. As soon as this baby is born though, DH is getting snipped. If I end up with a csection I will also be getting my tubes tied.

Jatpa003

Maelara said:

I say if you want to try for another, go for it! DD and this babe will only be 16 months apart but I'm strangely looking forward to it. I plan on wearing this new baby a lot and DD already walks so that won't ever be a problem. We are done after this one, it doesn't matter what the sex is. Pregnancy is very difficult for me (preaching to the choir!!) and I can't see myself doing this again. As for VBACS, my doctor is going to let me try (for now). That might change done the line but they are going to let me try even though these babies will only be 16 months apart. As soon as this baby is born though, DH is getting snipped. If I end up with a csection I will also be getting my tubes tied.

Thanks, this give me hope if I want another one right away:)

venussapphire

DD was born June 2012 and in May 2013 we decided to we wanted to start ttcing. However I was still breastfeeding and no cycle. It wasn't until october that I got my cycle back and could actually ttc.We finally had to completely wean beginning of january. Then feb we got a bfp. 

Closer would have been nicer but I'm still happy. This will most likely be our last.

jlaferne

Melak728 said:

My first two are 16ish months apart. I loved that spacing. I would have had 3&4 closer together if I could have talked DH into it sooner.

Eta: this will most definitely be our last baby. DH will be getting the big V probably in December

If you had one piece of advice to give on managing two that are 16 months apart what would it be? That's exactly the age gap my son and daughter will be and I'm very nervous but excited!

tigerpawie

This will be my 3rd and last. FI will get the big V right after this babe is born. I don't generally have a very good first trimesters, it definitely affects my desire to not get pregnant again. I have two from a previous marriage. 7 and 9. FI and I was trying for one for few years but it just never happened. We had just decided that we are done and we are happy with the two I have and we didn't want any large age gaps between the kids. We also assumed that maybe FI is sterile and at the same time.. I did struggle to get pregnant w my first two.

So this one is a huge huge surprise. I have my moments where I'm happy out of my mind but other moments wondering what I have gotten myself into! I am not a kid-friendly woman. I am just now finally starting to enjoy my kids and getting to know them so much better now that they are older and communicates better. We connect better now. So I am nervous for this time around. Sleepless nights and all that. Haha. But if I had better 1st trimesters... Just maybe I could have one more only if close in age but the first tri. Ugh. I'm just finally feeling better. :-/

Maelara

excitedpreggo12 said:

WildFlower810 said:

I used to like the idea of having kids close together so activities and such would be easier and fun as they grew up. The last 8 weeks since my BFP have been the 8 weeks from hell, though, so I've suddenly gone from wanting more kids to liking the idea of an only child. I have no. freaking. idea. how I could willingly put myself through this again. 

I have felt like this every day so far. But other moms reassure me that you have a way of "forgetting" all the bad and most likely try again. (if you wanted more than one child in the first place) I can't really believe all mothers who have 5+ kids have had all rainbow pregnancies so if they can do it maybe I'll "forget" all this horrid HG. I mean I already feel better than I did at 6-9 weeks and that's become a tad hazy...

Seriously I better forget everything. 

Bahaha! I said that so many times the last time I was pregnant! There was no way in hell I was having another baby unless I forgot. This baby wasnt planned so I didn't have much if a choice anyway, by about 6 months I was starting to think of another baby. While I didn't forget, that clock in my head told me it was time for another. Plus the memories get kind of, numb. You don't forget but they have less meaning once you meet your baby. Promise

lizgrace03

I think I'm one of the few here who isn't sure about more kids. DH would like one more after this first one, as for me- i'm on the fence. I want to wait and see how things go. The first tri was very hard on me and I just want to see how things go with this one.

silverwings72

Im on the fence about having more children. This will be our first. I am already 33 and feeling kinda old! Lol

nonoemily

I was kind of on the fence about having two or three, but now that I'm pregnant I'm ready to say this is it for me. DS will be 3 months short of 3 when the baby comes. DH wanted them closer together and I wasn't sure I wanted another one at all.

But DS is such a little doll, I figured we should have one more...

It's kind of a tough age to introduce a new baby, I feel. DS is very possessive right now. He doesn't want to share his mommy, or his toys, or his kitten with the new baby.

LadyBird9

I sure hope so.  We know life will be crazy and we may re-think our decision... but it took us SO long to get pg with this one, we're planning on starting to try again when this baby is close to a year old.  We have our fingers crossed that the same meds do the trick again, but who knows!

DisneyDee1984

We'd like to have three--and ideally be done within four years--so close it is!

wildflower75

I'm expected my second in early Nov and had my first last year in March so they will be 20 mos apart!
I must say that I'm a crazy type-A planner and as soon as I got home from my honeymoon I made a spreadsheet with my age and DH's age and the next 20 years or so and planned exactly (to the month) when I wanted to have our children. I was hoping for twins the first time around so that I would only have to be pregnant once but since that didn't happen we just had them back to back. I'm 39 and DH will be 44 this summer so I felt the need to get things going once we had been married for a year.
I'm excited about it. Just praying that my body cooperates (that the recovery from the repeat CS isn't too bad) and that my second baby is as much of an angel as my first! Wish I could be a stay at home mom but that is presently not an option.

mamathompson7

I have two very close in age (364 days), and the one huge benefit that I see is that they will have not really ever have known life with out each other. They will truly grow up together! I will say that it is very challenging, but I am pregnant with my 3rd (the other two just turned 1 and 2 this weekend), and I am excited that all three will be close

thedjinn88

My daughter is 5 yr and his daughter 8 yr, we have my daughter full time and his half the time. We want another after this one, if it's a girl most likely sooner then if a boy but I know I want a few year spend between them, want this one out of diapers before the next would be born. I want to have this one a bit independent so they don't feel like the baby took his/her spot. Just my feelings on it lol

morrkim

When the twins are born dd will be around 2. We debated about having them a year and a half or two and a half. After dd I decided didn't want to get pregnant right away so we were planning 2 1/2. Then I got off bc a few months before we planned on trying because we thought it would take a while for my cycles to regulate since they were funny between nursing and the mini pill, but we got pregnant right away.

sparklingwhit

DH and I never took our names out of our adoption registries...so it's possible, although generally agencies won't look at new parents and you have to wait at least 18 months before they will even consider you.

brooklyngirl18

what a great question! dh and i want with either 2 or 3, depending on money timing etc. i told dh i want to be done by 35, I'm 29 now, so we'll see. we kind of agreed to have the first 2 close together and then maybe wait a little while on the 3rd but we don't even have our first here yet so these plans will probably go out the window. 

soccer4us2013

Nope. I'm 1 and done. I have my 2 step-kids from DH's first marriage, 17 & 13...soon to be 18 & 14....adding a baby to the mix is crazy enough for us! LOL! 

But in all honesty, I've always only wanted 1 of my own. Always

MsMolly520

We are definitely done after this. This is #2&3. DS will be 21 mos when they are born. This will sound crazy to some but...I'm not a big fan of the newborn/baby stage and just want to get past this time in our lives. DS had extreme colic (we didn't start to see a change until he was 7-8 mos) and there were very few moments of baby bliss. He's a blast now and such a little character. I'm praying to alllll the Saints that these babies will have a gentle temperament. [-O<

Autumnsnow

We def want two so we'll be trying again as soon as the doc's say we can..Especially since we had to go through the infertility route...we have one lil' eskimo waiting for us..We also don't want to wait that long because by the time this lil munchkin is born i'll be 42 and it took 18 months for this one.  I'm not sure how long we would try for a second though

jaminjeff

KMW08 said:

At one point I thought I'd like to try again right away. My uterus has been an expensive whore & I plan on getting that quality $$$ back outta the bitch. Now I'm at lets wait and see. I do think I'd like 3 kids though. Only time will tell. As for breast feeding and ovulation and all that cycle jazz, what do the ob/mw's recommend for protection when your bf'ing? I'm having a hard time with this as I don't want to be on hormones again and after all my uterus has been through there's no way in hell I'd do an iud.

@KMW08 I skimmed and didn't see a response.  The doctor had me on the mini pill, I didn't even take it a month.  They said it's more important to take at the same time than other pills and I just couldn't do it.  I don't O on my own anyways and figured another child was always welcome in our lives.  We did use condoms, but that was also sporadic, if we even stopped to think about it.

kimberly_ann81

Peanut will be 16-17 months old when this one is born.  Wasn't planning on having two so close in age but surprise.  I'm a little worried about how Peanut will do with the newest one.  Sweet Pea will be almost 4 so I'm not worried too much about him.  He wanted one of the ultrasounds pictures I brought home from my appointment this morning.  I also have a daycare boy who is only 4 months older than Peanut so I think I'll be fine.

We are hoping for a girl this time around.  If we have a girl I think we will be done.  We may try for a 4th is this one is a boy but I think we maybe done regardless if this one is a boy or girl.

@maelara June 2013 mama with you and now again here.

kimberly_ann81

tylerkingrn said:

This is my third and DS will be 18 months apart from this one. I like that they will be close in age! My kids will be 4, 18 months, and newborn. I also have that feeling that if this one is a boy that I will want to try one more time for that girl!

Mine are almost the same age gap: I'll have almost 4 (3y10m), 17ish m, and newborn.

ProcessofBecoming

My son will be a little over 2 1/2 when his little brother arrives. If I were younger, I would have liked more of a gap. But it will be good for my son to have a buddy in his little brother. This pregnancy was a surprise, as we weren't trying at all (we had sex once the entire month, as everyone in the house was sick and passing germs back and forth to each other), but I'm grateful that all is going well.

As for more kids, my ass will be 43 when this kid shows up (God willing, we make it to term). I am TIRED. After this one, the store is closed.

jf198400

My first two are 18 months apart and I love it. They are best friends. I was nervous about 2 so close together but it really wasn't that bad. Now my kids will be 4, almost 3, and newborn. I wanted to get pregnant with baby3 sooner actually but we put things on hold b/c I was changing jobs.

We also would like to have a 4th. DH wants to have them close together like 2yrs apart or less. I'm not sure. I'm transitioning to SAHM and I'm nervous about 4 kids. I'm thinking it might be easier to have them like 2.5 to 3 yrs apart (when the older kids are in preschool/ school). We'll see how it goes once this baby arrives.

Rhall2088

We won't be having anymore! My son is 13 months now and I am so nervous about having them so close together. We weren't planning on having another one. We thought that we would adopt when he turned 5. My husband said 2 is the limit and scheduled his procedure while I'm on maternity leave since I can't take birth control

phdprocrastinator

carafern said:

This will be our first and we both definitely want more than one. It took us two years TTC to get pregnant so we'll probably start trying soon after. I'm also 34, so spacing them out too much doesn't seem particularly practical at this point:)

I don't even know how soon after you can/should start trying? Six months? Longer? Does BF affect things?

I

BFing can reduce your chance of getting pregnant, as you may ovulate less.  It's a kind of "natural birth control," although there are always stories of women getting pregnant right away anyway.

As for the OP, I'm pretty sure we're done after this one.  DD will be almost 3 when #2 is born.  I hate being pregnant and always said 2 was the number for me.  DH wants to wait on any permanent fixes for a while "to be sure" (he's always said 2-3).  I really, really don't want to be pregnant again.  But I will concede that I forgot about how awful it was with DD, and she's kind of worth it...

SarahHeck

My plan was to have mine close together. That's what my mom did because of wanting us to be friends and that made sense to me, but with all the medical problems we went through with my daughter... My kids are going to end up being 5 years apart, but I'm happy with that now actually. After thinking it through, I'm not really that great of friends with my brother that is close to my age and I am more friends with my sister that is 12 years older than I am. I figure if my kids are going to be friends then they will be. Can't control everything and now I get to experience the whole new baby thing all over again and I'll get more one on one time with my little ones.

highbornhunter

My DH and I have discussed having at least two since we got together.  I'm 34 and he turns 42 next month so I don't want to wait too long to try again after this.  I feel selfish to say this but I feel like the hardest part would be that I basically won't be able to drink for a couple years straight between this pregnancy, breast-feeding (I've heard about P&D but it seems like a lot of work and who knows if I'll have enough milk to store some up?) and a 2nd pregnancy if we start trying again right away.  I miss my wine and beer!

Ashleyrupert3211

This is our first so we def want to have one or two more. I'd like them to be close in age! I wouldn't mind trying for another once this little guy hits a year

crizz13

I would love to try again soon! This is our first and I want at least 4, so we have to get moving!

runningmama14

Over the course of our 15 years together, dh and I have had quite the pendulum swings on kids. At first, I was one and done, if I even decided I wanted one. Dh was all about the big family.

Several years ago, we both kinda settled on one. Then we got into foster care with the plan to adopt 1 older child, and then maybe have one bio once things settled in with adoption. Foster care took us on a surprise journey of trying to adopt a sibling set of three (ages 5, 8 and 11). During that time, we watched how great the kids were together. At that point I decided that siblings were a must, that I would never be one and done. Our plan was to adopt them and no bios.

When that adoption failed, we were crushed and burnt out, so we decided to try the bio route. Here we are.

We plan to go back to foster care, but not sure how soon. We may try for a second bio pretty quickly and then wait until both are older before doing it again. Foster care can expose your family to a lot of unknowns, and I think I would want the kid/kids to be old enough to understand right and wrong and process what's happening in the family.

There is a very small chance that we may get the opportunity to adopt the three sometime this summer or fall. If that happens, we would do it in a heartbeat, but would be done with bios! Our house would be busting at the seems and it would be worth it :-)

melissajam

DD was born last October so these two will be about 13 months apart. Sometimes I get nervous about how close in age they'll be because DD will not be very independent yet, but we wanted our children to be close in age. I'll be able to let you know if we made the right choice later on. Our plan now is to have 3 or 4 children, and we'll likely start trying for our third soon after this one is born. These plans all depend on how we adjust to this addition though. My plan is to be done having babies by 25 though (I'll be 21 when this one is born), so they'll have to be pretty close together.