When to cut your losses

kimberlygo

Hi - I'm mostly a lurker, but was hoping I could get some advice from working moms. My baby is 6 months old. After having him, I quit my job (which I loved) and started a new job because I needed more money. I've been there for 3 months. This job is not what they told me it would be. I am not working on the types of projects I was told I would be working on, my managers are not the types of managers they said they would be, and the culture of the company is such that I'm in the office until 8 a.m. on on email sometimes until midnight. I've had success in previous job, and I'm not doing well at this one and therefore I think I've made a bad impression that I'm not sure can be changed. It makes me so anxious that I can't eat or sleep. I've lost 10 lbs in the past two weeks. I do not think I can be successful here and I feel like a failure. When do I cut my losses and start looking for something else. Should I still give myself time? TIA.

kimberlygo

It's not too hard to change. I called a few recruiters to see what was out there, and I could go on interviews next week if I chose to. I just feel like a failure. I don't know how else to describe it. But I'm totally miserable.

VOR

kimberlygo said:

It's not too hard to change. I called a few recruiters to see what was out there, and I could go on interviews next week if I chose to. I just feel like a failure. I don't know how else to describe it. But I'm totally miserable.

Look for a new job.  Life is too short to hate what you're doing AND to be spending so much time away from your baby.

nolagal79

Definitely start looking for something else. You're miserable and no job is worth that. Like pp said - we all have an "oops" job change - or at least I know I did. I was there for one day short of a year and looking back on it that was way too long!!! Are you afraid that your reputation will be damaged from changing jobs so quickly? I really don't think that's an issue anymore, at least not in the rehab/therapy world I work in, because therapists change jobs often. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide.

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Speshul

You could try contacting your old place and see if they would come up on pay, or just take you back. I've been there with a job and so has DH. The thing is no job is worth being sick over, and you will feel a huge relief if you quit. You might try to look for something else before quitting, but if nothing happens just take a break from the stress while you look for another job.

ETA: You can also give yourself a deadline. "If nothing changes by July, I will quit."

MommyAtty

That's a lot of really big change in 6 mos. with a new baby and a new job. You may just be really hard on yourself right now. But if you've taken a close look, and you really think this just isn't a good fit, start looking. There's no shame in saying a job just isn't what you thought it would be.

MommaP12

This exact thing happened to me.  

I started a new job while 6 months pregnant.  Hated it immediately.  Told myself to come back after leave and see how it goes.  I should not have done that.  I should have called my old employer and gotten back in there.  It was a nightmare.

It took me 9 months to find a new job and I was sick every day working there, bad anxiety, thought I had PPD (couldn't tell if it was PPD or the miserable job!).  I had a new baby and it was a horrible time in my life.   It's not worth it.  Try to get back into your old employer asap or start hunting immediately.  I really feel for you.  Good luck.

kmh2201

I switched employers in Dec. 2013.  My first week there I felt like I had made the wrong decision.  Similar to the OP, I feel like they told me I would be doing different work than what I was doing, and the culture they sold me on was not what it actually was.  I ended up going back to my former employer/job before the end of Feb. 2014 and it was a great decision.  There is no harm in looking for other opportunities if you are miserable.  Good luck!!

kimberlygo

Thank you so much for the advice. Unfortunately, I cannot go back to my old job, which is why I left. Financially, they were not doing well, and it was only a matter of time before they were going to start laying people off. I have a job interview on thursday, and hopefully that will give me a good sense of whether it is me, or the job. If nothing else, at least I have a job for now, and I can keep looking.

bethughknee

Good luck on Thursday! Yikes. When I was miserable, I changed jobs. No shame in it.