One twin never sleeps ... HELP

TobieRose

So this is only partly twin-related, but I really, really need some advice. 

My boys are 6 months old this week. Twin A is a pretty good sleeper. I've started getting him on a nap schedule this week; he goes down easily, wakes up 30 minutes later, fusses a bit, and then goes back to sleep. Same with his midnight waking; then he wakes between 2-4am and comes into bed with DH and I. 

Twin B is a whole 'nuther story. He has reflux and so lying flat sometimes bothers him, thus we were never that insistent about getting him to sleep in his crib. He hasn't been in it for at least two months. Sometimes he will nap for 15-30 minutes in a bouncy chair or swing; he will do that twice a day but no more, so he's exhausted, grumpy, and clingy a lot of the time. If he had his way he would only ever sleep in my arms. In fact, at night he will only sleep if DH or I are holding him or lying next to him in our bed. If we put him down and leave him then five or ten minutes later he wakes up screaming. I am going to talk to his pedi about medication at his next appointment, but that still leaves the problem of him refusing to sleep without being snuggled ... 

It is starting to drive. me. crazy. I love this guy so much but I get so resentful because he NEVER SLEEPS and I can never get anything done or spend one-on-one time with his twin or my 2 year old, let alone my husband. But I am worried about sleep-training him because I'm afraid that any crying associated with sleep-training will cause him pain because of the reflux. 

I guess I don't know what I'm looking for ... permission to sleep train him? Tips from people who've been there? Offers of wine and chocolate? :-P As I typed that last paragraph he woke up again in his bouncy chair so I guess I'm done typing ... thanks for letting me vent. 

amex0107

Yes talk to your pedi!!!  My twin B was exactly the same but at around 2 months of age.  After a few rounds (and a long four weeks) of homeopathic treatments per the Pedi's due diligence, the pedi finally prescribed medication.  I tell ya, after about a week of medicine, we had a completely different baby.  He was happy & finally started sleeping better.  He only had to take the medication for about 2 months, so that's not bad.  Good luck to ya!

10-4LilBuddy

Go to your pedi. My son has been on reflux meds since two months. He sleeps so much better. He was gaining weight fine and only spitting up every once in a while, but was cranky and clingy. The meds made such a difference. It did take a while to find the right dosage and we have increased it every couple of months as he has grown.

You may need to have him sleep slightly elevated. My son is almost seven months and can no longer sleep in his RnP because it isn't comfortable anymore - he's too big. He may need more room than a bouncy chair.

Good luck. We are currently transitioning little man to a crib and have had him in our bed this week to get him used to sleeping flat.

caden

Reflux medication, new fancy formula and elevating one end of the crib mattresses worked for my reflux babies. GL!

Snugly Ael

He sounds a lot like my daughter. She too had reflux. My pedi had given us a reflux med, but she never liked the taste of it and always spit it out. Later our pedi advised us to change her formula to Enfamil Gentlease and add rice cereal to it. Since then she's been a lot better. She was very gassy too before we changed her formula. She's 9 months old and is napping fine in her crib now. I plan to sleep train her in a few days. Till date she sleeps with either my hubby or me. Just like your son, she also used to wake up when we left her after she slept, but now she wakes up only sometimes.

I delayed sleep training her because she had reflux and was very demanding (I had/have the same feelings like you have). There were days I had to sleep/nap with her just so she could sleep well because sleep is very important for their development. There were days she used to sleep only on my recliner chair with her head rested either on my shoulder or chest, and I had to sit there till she woke up. She hardly naped in her bouncy chair or swing (just like your son). There were times when I used to put her in our bed and have pillows on both the sides. She started crawling at 7 months, unlike her twin brother who started at 5 months. So until she started crawling things were pretty messy, tiring and hectic for all of us. Once she got mobile, she literally exhausted herself and when I used to put her down in her crib (after she fell asleep in my arms) she used to sleep for an hour or two!!!! It got easier as she became more and more mobile with every passing day.

I understand it's hard having one twin demanding so much from you and the other getting neglected, but I guess it's alright. I made sure when they both were awake I spend quality time with each of them. I noticed that when one twin is crabby and demanding, the other would be calm and composed. Hope it's like that with your twins too. This too shall pass. Good luck! *hugs*

TobieRose

Thank you everyone for the encouragement/advice. One of the things that is SO frustrating is that he was a "happy spitter" (and slept) until about 4 months ... that was when he developed reflux symptoms. He is getting better but sooooo slowly. His 6 month appointment is next week and I am going to talk to his pedi about medication.