I've been lurking for a couple months and want to finally introduce myself.
I'm 39, DH is 41 and we've been married for almost 8 years, TTC since September. About a year and a half ago, I put 100% into losing weight, getting healthy and tracking my cycles. I have a short luteal phase so my doctor referred me to a RE and I started acupuncture shortly after that. The RE seemed to be more concerned about giving me diet and exercise advice than answering fertility related questions and giving us some direction on that front. We switched to a new RE a couple weeks ago and now we've got a plan to move on to IUI. I had my baseline ultrasound today and everything looked good. I have an HSG test scheduled for Monday (first RE said it wasn't necessary!) and I am completely and utterly freaked out about it. I'm starting Clomid tonight and hoping the HSG results are good so we can continue with IUI.
I never wanted to have kids but that changed when my niece was born a few years ago. It's funny that I went from being adamant that I would never have children to putting so much effort into TTC. I have hypothyroidism and the doctor who diagnosed me told me I probably wouldn't be able to get pregnant and if I did, the baby and I could have a lot of health complications. Because of that, DH and I actually considered adoption first. While we were looking into adoption, I switched to a new primary doctor who was shocked by what the first doctor told me. She encouraged me to focus on my health for a bit and then TTC. I was convinced it would happen just by getting healthier, losing weight, eliminating a lot of stress, etc. I still feel like it could happen naturally but let's be honest, at 39, time is not on my side. I was really excited for IUI but now my emotions are all over the place. I'm excited, terrified and everything in between. On good days, I am positive and convinced this will be the month. On bad days, I question whether I really want a child, if I'm meant to be a mother and how I will ever go through labor if I'm such a mess about the HSG and IUI. I don't really have anyone in real life to talk to other than DH so I'm feeling a bit isolated with all these new emotions.
I'm happy to have a place like this were other people are in a similar situation. I hope we all get our BFP's sooner rather than later!