Weekly Check-In For The **Over 40** Crowd

PrivateOne

This is a special weekly Thursday check-in for all of us who have crossed into our 40's. We all hang out on TTC after 35, but we all know that once you hit your fabulous 40's and are TTC it is just different.

There is a regular Weekly Check In on Wednesdays for all on this board, so feel free to post on both check-ins if you like. If you are completely new to the TTC after 35 board and haven't done a formal intro please do that before posting here!

1. Your Name and/or Screen Name (no full names) and the State you live in and what number are you TTC (i.e first, second, third child).

2. Where are you in your cycle and what kind of cycle is it (IVF, IUI, Natural... etc)?

3. What medications, supplements, treatments and/or special diet are part of your cycle that are helping you with TTC?

4. Who do you want to give a shout out to this week from our board (or somewhere else if applicable)?

5. Weekly Vent - Go ahead, vent on one thing that is really irking you this week, promise you will feel better after.

**Name That Action (NTA) **  With Mother's Day only a few days away, will it be a happy, joyous day for you or will you find it emotionally difficult?  Any tips on how to protect yourself amidst the bombardment of Mother's Day messages?

PrivateOne

1. PrivateOne - CT. Still trying for 1st

2. Waiting to begin my 3rd IVF.  Hoping to get enough retrieved this time to be able to proceed with PGD testing batch with the frozens we have from IVF #2.

3. Prenatals, CoQ10, trying to eat as healthy as I can and using organic food whenever possible.  Going to make an appt to start accupunture as well.

4.  My shout out goes to all the newbies on this board.  We've added quite a few new folks in the last few weeks and I'd like to wish them much success and thank them for sharing their journey.

5. My step son and fiance go married last weekend.  If one more person asked if I had children of my own or made comments about the happy couple having their own right away I was seriously going to loose it.  It's all over now so I can resume back to normal life where most folks don't inquire.  

**Name That Action (NTA) **  Mother's Day is a crazy day for me.  My mother passed away 8 years ago so I can't celebrate with her and I have a very hard time that I am not a mother to my own children at this late stage in life. Also, since I am adopted and have found my biological mother it poses a strange situation in that I feel I should say happy mother's day to her yet she is not the woman I consider "mom".  

I'll also stay away from all social media to aviod seeing everyone else's non stop postings on the subject.  It will be extra tough though as I'll be with my SIL and her 2 kiddos on Sunday. I really wish I could just be alone that day and not have to see mom's and kids interacting.

MelissaMiso

***child mentioned***

1. Melissa from Long Island, NY

2. fertile days, natural right now

3. prenatal vitamins and DHA (I ran out of my vitamin D but I usually take that too) all vegetarian versions

4. Shout out to my fellow TTC gardeners for making things grow! It's spring time, planting time. Yippee!

5. Vent: having work related dreams this week, including a sex dream with my boss. I don't want to dream or think about work when I'm not there. grrrrrr)

Mother's Day has always been nice because I have the best mom in the world. DD1 was born just before Mother's Day two years ago so it rocks despite still not being knocked up yet with child 2.

kelley72

1. name and screen name: Kelley  ttc #6
2. Natural cycle, waiting for cycles to start after delivery
3. I take folic acid, prenatal vitamins and check cf and cp
4. All who are having a rough emotional week: hugs!
5. I go back to work on Monday so not thrilled about that

**Name That Action (NTA) **  It's a toss up for me on Mother's Day, we will go to church and take my mom to lunch so I am blessed and thrilled that she is alive and in my life.  I feel that having healthy kids is my gift and I need no other.  My heart goes out to those that do not have lo's to hug and hold

Davie813

@PrivateOne, good luck with your retrieval!  And I'm so sorry about your mother.

1. Davie813, Chicago, TTC #2

2. 2 DPO, last natural cycle before RE referral

3. Oh, God: evening primrose oil, royal jelly, maca, CoQ10, DHEA, wheatgrass, bupleurum form acupuncturist, acupuncture, prenatal, folic acid, calcium/magnesium/vitamin D.  Clearly, I need to calm down with this.

4. Who do you want to give a shout out to this week from our board (or somewhere else if applicable)?  @beckyp005, so many good wishes for your beta tomorrow!

5. Weekly Vent - (child-centered).  I have been fighting with my husband about our daughter's baptism.  Basically, he's Catholic, and I'm not religious.  We had always assumed we would go ahead and raise DD as a Catholic, because it means a lot to him and then she'd have a religious tradition to continue with when she got older, or not--it would be up to her.  But now that it's coming down to it, I really don't feel positively about it at all, and I don't feel like he's taking my concerns seriously.  Plus, his mother (with whom I've had my share of power struggles) is turning it into quite the event (inviting family from out of town without consulting us, producing the family christening gown and telling us (not asking!) that our daughter would wear it.  And so on.  The same exact thing happened with her at our wedding (which, if it were up to me, would have been a city hall affair.)

Sorry for the long vent.  Anyway, I think the tension must be apparent, because we woke up this morning to discover that my cat had peed on DH's shoes.  I appreciate the show of moral support, if that's what it was, but it REALLY didn't help!

NTA. This is lame, but all our weekends go by in a frenzy of shopping and cleaning and generally trying to prepare for the week.  So I'm doing my level best to remember to buy my mother a card, but other than that I don't think we're going to notice that it is Mother's Day.

Lesliem0901

1. Margaret from Michigan
2. Benched this cycle. Waiting for AF
3. Prenatal, CoQ10. Starting acupuncture tonight!
4. Shout out to all the fabulous ladies on this board. This week, @Davie813 for making me crack up a few times.
5. Oddly enough, I don't have anything to vent about this week.
6. @PrivateOne - I can relate. I lost my mom 12 years ago when I was 29. I struggle with this week, but try to remember all the great things about her. We're taking my 97 yo grandma out to brunch on Sunday; for her I would do anything.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

BeckyP005

@PrivateOne fx for a great number retrieved!!! Sorry for the loss of your mom. You probably mentioned this but my memory is bad...how often do you talk/see your mom? @MelissaMiso‌ the housekeeper always had sex dreams about our boss!! Ewwww . @kelley72 hoping your first week back is a smooth one. @Davie813‌ thank you. I don't envy you on the baptism situation. Big hugs and YH needs to step in and tell his mom to back off...wth! @JimBobCooter‌ thanks girl. Have fun at the painting class!!

1. Becky from Pittsburgh
2. 2ww. Beta tomorrow...cue the nervous stomach Have been peeing away and no lines.
3. Just prenatals
4. Shout out to all you wonderful ladies who have been keeping me in their thoughts for the past 2 weeks.
5. No vent...wouldn't help. Oh wait..if one more person tells me to just adopt I will scream.

NTA: Stay off FB lol. Probably go see my mom and that's it.

gabbagal

1. Linda from MA, TTC #1

2. I've been a bit removed from the process (and the boards) as DH and I continue to analyze incessantly what our options are and what our next step will be. We've only gone the natural route in the past, but I met with an RE and started doing initial testing, but have not finished and keep telling myself I'll get back on track next cycle.

3. Just taking prenatals

4. I want to give a shout out to @JimBobCooter whose posts have made me laugh too many times to count.

5. I got into the most ridiculous fight with my brother early in the week that just made me fume for days. It was so awkward b/c DH and I were driving home from a weekend away and I was on the phone with my bro practically screaming while DH was trying to drive.

NTA (**warning - losses mentioned**)

I adore my mom and know I'm lucky to have her around, so I'll be happy to spend time with her. Ironically, the screaming match I got into with my brother was about scheduling a time to get together for mother's day so that was one unpleasant aspect of the holiday!

I think it will also be emotionally difficult b/c if my first pregnancy was viable, this would've been my first official mother's day as a mom, and if my second pregnancy worked out, I'd be almost through my second trimester (approx. 25 weeks) by this weekend. I've already been thinking about it and hope the actual day will be more filled with happy times with my mom (and MIL) and not with reminders of what could've been.

@PrivateOne I hope your day isn't too bad and you don't get too bombarded with any negative cues

@MelissaMIso and @Kelley72 have a good time with your moms and LOs

@Davie813 I am sorry you're experiencing that friction. I can relate as my DH is Catholic and I'm Jewish, but not very religious. We've often had that "what if" conversation around religion and even though we don't even have kids yet, it has been a somewhat difficult/touchy topic

@Lesliem0901, have fun with your grandma. 97 is amazing! 

@JimBobCooter, have a nice mother's day with DS, and it sounds like it will be good that they serve wine when you'll be painting with your mom

Davie813

gabbagal said:

@Davie813 I am sorry you're experiencing that friction. I can relate as my DH is Catholic and I'm Jewish, but not very religious. We've often had that "what if" conversation around religion and even though we don't even have kids yet, it has been a somewhat difficult/touchy topic

In this particular case, a lot of the tension is really more about establishing boundaries with my MIL than about religion per se.  Our differences don't usually cause a lot of friction for for me and MH, and hopefully they won't for you and yours, either! 

I hope everyone has a great (or at least pleasant and peaceful) Mother's Day.  As I mentioned, weekends are actually a bit stressful for us, but I am looking forward to taking some time out to call my mom.

thirtyninetoforty

Paige from PA, TTC #1
Waiting to see if I O in a couple of weeks and hoping for my first IUI
prenatals, CoQ10, extra folic, B12 complex, this cycle I will start clomid 100 mg and a steroid tomorrow.
@BeckyP005 deserves a special shout this week - I am so sending good vibes your way
No vent this week
Mother's Day - ehh well I try not to see anything because I want to be a mother and it messes with me and I will see my mom on saturday so it will be just another day...

PrivateOne

Thanks everyone! 

@BeckyP005 - I see my birth mom a few times a year, but are also in contact with her through email and such as well. 

Samuelismomma

1)Samuelismomma , Sally , IN , ttc # 2... 2)11 dpo, deciding whether to test and skip whole beta drama if af late and just get u/s or go thru beta hell:( 3)prenatal, high folic acid, co q10, b complex, zinc, vitamin C....all ok'd by DR. 4)shout out to @BeckyP005‌ , wishing you the best! And @hooligans4‌ for missing me on when I was gone! Missed you too:) 5) I'm very sensitive to the ladies here who have never had a baby to hold, but if my mom, and sister keeps saying I have Samuel it's alright if we don't have another:( I'm going to explode! Sister wanted no kids and mom had 7 so there advice isn't really wanted! 5)going to a Mother's Day party with my son and H, some lovely ladies he works with is doing it with food and a band:) sounds like fun, plus a little date night too! Moms day will have BBQ with mom, ( I take care of her she lives with me...) happy Mother's Day to all you gals, and remember doesn't matter if you have a lo, if you have baby sat, took care of friends, family lo's or take care of fur babies your a mom!! Lots of love to you all!

Pintobean39

I hope y'all don't mind if I join this check-in, I'm turning 40 next month so I kinda feel like I'm there anyway.


1. Your Name and/or Screen Name (no full names) and the State you live in and what number are you TTC (i.e first, second, third child).

Pintobean from Louisiana trying for my 3rd but my husbands first. I have 2 boys almost 21 and 15.

2. Where are you in your cycle and what kind of cycle is it (IVF, IUI, Natural... etc)? I'm on bc now and should start my first IVF at the end of the month with ER around the 1st or 2nd week of June.

3. What medications, supplements, treatments and/or special diet are part of your cycle that are helping you with TTC? PNV, Ubiquinol, and decided to try melatonin.

4. Who do you want to give a shout out to this week from our board (or somewhere else if applicable)? To many to mention but lots of kind words.

5. Weekly Vent - Go ahead, vent on one thing that is really irking you this week, promise you will feel better after. I'm just pissed that all these meds are causing all kinda of issues with my Ménière's. I've been having horrible spells daily and my Dr that did my surgery last year won't treat me because I'm starting the IVF process. So I'm just going to have to suffer through them until I'm done.


Loss mentioned


**Name That Action (NTA) ** With Mother's Day only a few days away, will it be a happy, joyous day for you or will you find it emotionally difficult? Any tips on how to protect yourself amidst the bombardment of Mother's Day messages? My mom died 15 years ago and I hate Mother's Day. I also found out I was pregnant with the first little girl I lost last year on Mother's Day. Since my mom died I've stayed away from church and I've just spent the day with my boys and my aunt (my moms sister) and cousins. This year I'm hosting the BBQ/pool party at my house so hopefully that will keep me busy. I'll prob also start off the morning with a mimosa, they always help.

kellsnajay

**loss mentioned*

Kellsnajay, NY, TTC #1 after prev m/c in 2005.
No actual infertility diagnosis by multiple doctors.One prenatal
supplements for extra boost.
Officially TTC seriously again, starting naturally this cycle, CD 2

Mother's Day was hard and I become very bitchy every year. Dealing with depression and not on meds currently, which is another TTC issue.
Glad to find this page and thank all the ladies for their love and support!!!! xoxo

massiahl

*** Miscarriage and pregnancy mentioned ***

1. Massiahl from New York checking in!

2.  Miscarriage at 6 1/2 weeks in 2011, myomectomy in 2012, started trying again naturally in 2012, diagnosed with chromosomal inversion in 2012. Started IVF in January 2013.  Did 3 cycles with successful retrieval of chromosomally normal embryos in September 2013. Transferred in November 2013. Pregnant 2 weeks later. In 3rd trimester of pregnancy.

3. Fistfuls of the following every morning: prenatals, CoQ10, DHEA (75 mgs), DIM-Plus (DHEA and DIM work together), L-Arginine, Glutathione, bee pollen and Vitamin E.  Protein shakes made with whey protein, spirulina or organic supergreens, maca, and any fruit with a high concentration of antioxidants: blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, and the like.  Acupuncture with a technician specializing in fertility 3X a week and replaced intensive workouts with less strenuous practices, i.e., yoga.

4. Shout out to all of us on this journey.  If we can't cheer for ourselves, who the hell can?

5.  Mothers' Day was for my mother.  My turn will come next year. 

)