Playgroup question...LO and older toddlers

coffeeandbooks

I bring my LO to a play area in the library, it is open to babies and children of all ages and I love it because it gives my LO an opportunity to interact with other children.

He really loves going and is very interested in the other children and wants to play with them.  He will be 11 months next week and is still in the puts everything in his mouth phase and is more into knocking things over than building them.  There seems to be a lot of three year olds who go to the area...LO so far has done well with the older little girls who are willing to share and play but the three old boys seem to be in the this is mine stage and are more territorial.

 LO is kind of obliviously happy to all this but the three olds have had some melt downs with LO getting in on their turf.    I feel bad about it because the other moms seemed forced to discipline their kids because of my baby but I am not sure if I should be keeping LO away from them which would be really hard to do because it is a very small area...or just deal with the fact that it is a teachable moment for the three old on how to deal with a baby and also share.

Anyway, I am playgroup newbie...what is the etiquette here?

mommatotwo2

I'd try finding a group that caters more to a younger baby/toddler.

motang

If the playgroup is for kids of all ages, I would look at it as a teachable moment for the parents of the older toddlers. You shouldn't take the socialization opportunity away from your child because the other kids get upset if he knocks over their blocks. If a particular toddler is known to melt down when your LO is nearby, I'd just redirect my LO to another area/activity.

coffeeandbooks

Thanks, @motang mom ...I think I am leaning towards this way of thinking too.   Today, actualy one of the three year olds had a meltdown because his mother thought he was being too rough around my LO and so yelled at him...I actually didn't feel concered about it and kind of think that yeah 11 months will knock things down occasionally and three year olds will be unwieldy...but the point of the play area is for them all to figure out how to get along with others.

Shoegal36

I most definitely don't think you should stop going and I agree that if it's for all ages then the older children need to learn to play around babies. I used to go to something similar and when LO would crawl over and grab something out of an older child's hand, I would go take it and give it back though. Even though LO didn't have a clue what was going on, I would say "no, no we don't take toys like that" to be fair to the older child. If she insisted on grabbing it or crawling in their way I would pick her up and redirect her to something else and she happily obliged. 

emmy236

I'd maybe try and make friends with the mom. Our neighbors have twin 3 year olds who are usually either by themselves or around older kids. They are super well behaved, just not used to being another anything smaller. R is now mobile enough to want to try and play with them. At first they didn't mean to but, they knocked him over. Their mom explained he's little and they are "big boys" and need to help him. Now they are so sweet finding "baby" toys and showing him how to play with hot wheels, blocks etc. R loves being around them so it's been great for everyone.