Scheduled c section and child care

Runningmomfam

I have a 2 year old son and am wondering if we should have my mil watch him while I go on for a scheduled c section or just have my husband watch him. Mil lives 2.5 hours away and I'm afraid she won't leave if she comes. I really just want my space and privacy with my new family of 4. I'm considering scheduling the c section and not telling any family until like day 3 of recovery. I get too overwhelmed. Do I really need help for an hr long surgery? Thoughts?

LKHoffa

I'm a FTM mom, but from seeing friends go through it, you will appreciate the help. If you MIL stresses you out, maybe you can find someone who doesn't to at least help babysit during the first weeks?

tbmadeamistake

Generally c-sections have a four day hospital stay...if your DH is watching your son, are you going to be ok all by yourself in the hospital?  Our plan (assuming vaginal delivery, 2 days), is to have someone watch C for the first night at least and, depending on how I'm feeling, have DH be home with her on night two and I'll be in the hospital on my own at that point.  We have daycare for her during the day, so he'll still spend the majority of time with me.  I think you should look at all the repercussions, as this won't be just about during the surgery, it will also encompass your entire stay.

chickpea912

We currently have plans for MIL to watch M at least the day of my RCS, if not for a day or two.  We're torn on whether or not to have her go to school those days or just have days of fun with grandma, but I'm not assuming I'll be able to take care of the baby in the hospital on my own with the surgery.  I was in the hospital for 5 days with M, so I'm hoping I'll be okay with DH going home to stay with her after the first couple of days, but I'm not counting on that happening right away.

If you're that uncomfortable with your MIL, is there anyone else who could stay with your son for at least the first night or two?  

hjl050308

I've had a csection and will be having a repeat one in 5 weeks.  While in the hospital, my plan is starting on day 2 after the csection, that my kids will go with my parents during the day (they go every day anyway so this is no change for anyone), come to the hospital to visit, go home with my husband who will feed them, get them ready for bed, and then my mom will come to our house so my husband can come back after dinner.  The first day, you need the help at the hospital, unless you want to rely solely on your post partum nurses.  You may hooked up those electric compression socks, morphine/pain pumps and often aren't allowed out of bed for at least the first 12 hours (in my experience and also what my OB just reminded me of).  During that time, you'll likely want someone there to help you to get the baby from the bassinet for feedings, help with diaper changes, etc.  

After we get home from the hospital, it will just be me and my family of 5.  I'll have help come over after 2 weeks when my husband returns to work.  

traceyboo37

If I have a RCS, we will either stay in my friends apartment or nearby hotel since my doc and hospital are in another state. My father in law will keep the 2 year old occupied while my husband stays with me for delivery. After that, my husband will take care of him and both will be close by the hospital to come in and out. Once discharged, either my mom or his will stay with me after my husband returns to work three weeks later then the other one after that followed by others for at least a 3 month period.

Katieluc106

Planning for another vaginal delivery but our plan is to send Lucy to my grandmothers while I'm in labor. My mom and dad will both be at the hospital with me and DH.

As soon as this baby is out DH will go get Lucy. And he will go home with her that night and mom will stay with me.

This is the best plan I've come up with so far because it keeps Lucy's daily routine as normal as possible.

If I go I to labor in the middle of the night like I did with Lucy or even if it's later at night then she will just sleep at my grandmothers until the AM. They predict this to be a really quick labor and delivery because my last one was.

MrsCase1

I am planning to leave Lincoln with my parents starting the day I deliver. That way DH can be with me. DH will only have the day of my surgery off so I want us to have that time together. Lincoln will have more fun with his grandparents, anyway. My husband would not want to miss the birth. After I am discharged my husband will go to the airport to retrieve his mother, who will stay for two weeks to help me.

liberty95

My parents live very close to the hospital where I will be delivering.  Our plan is to pack up and head there for a few days.  We stay there as a family pretty often and DS has a room so it is an easy transition for him for a few days.  Our dog has a blast there, too. 
On the day of my c-section DH and my mom will be with me, DS will be at their house with my dad and sister (SAHM with a son close to my son's age so they can play).  They will bring DS to the hospital to meet the baby and then my parents will bring him home and DH will stay the night with me.
As for the other 3 nights in the hospital, DH will either stay with me or sleep at my parents, depending on how I am feeling.  Regardless of where he sleeps, he can go back and forth pretty easily to be with DS, do his bedtime routine, etc.

flerlgirl

Could you ask a friend or neighbor to watch DS and bring him to the hospital? Like @ugabamafans said, if you want DH with you in the OR, someone is going to have to watch DS anyway. Personally, I am leaving my son with my mom and dad and they can do as they please - bring him to the hospital, stay home, send one parent while the other stays at home, etc. They have generously agreed to completely watch him for a few days, and I am taking full advantage. I want him to meet his sister and we will spend lots of time together as a family but things are crazy enough at the hospital without a toddler underfoot. So I would try to make arrangements for someone to be available to keep your son. 

steprozz

Luke will be going to my parents house the night before my csection so me and DH can get some good rest. after LO is born the next day and we have had some time alone with the new guy, my parents will bring him to the hospital to meet his brother, luckily they live closer to the hospital than we do. you definitely want to have someone with you for the surgery and immediately after unless you want to rely on your pp nurses which I personally wouldn't like. it sounds from your post you haven't had a csection before (maybe you have I don't know) but if you haven't it can be really scary to be in the OR by yourself and I wouldn't want to be alone and I have had a csection before. and I'm pretty sure your DH wouldn't want to miss the birth just because you don't want MIL to come. if you're really that concerned about her coming then like others have said, maybe ask a neighbor or friend if they can watch him for you.