Late Term and Child Loss

PAL

Welcome to the PAL check-in! Please feel free to ask questions (whether or not you are PAL) and get to know one another and the journey each person is on.

How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) 

Do you have any upcoming milestones?

How has this week been for you?

QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? 

Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?

Lilypie - (qptF)


Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
"Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


Re: PAL

  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?)  Chester is 10w. Many nicknames, but the one that will stick is "Chet". It was my grandfather's nickname for Chester (his name too). We also call him stinky...for obvious reasons. And we hope that one doesn't stick. ;-)

    Do you have any upcoming milestones? We just passed 2m shots (yesterday) and he is doing surprisingly well. Growing like a weed. 

    How has this week been for you? Pretty good. 

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? Tuesday it snowed, but its back to the 70s, which is nice. We like to get out everyday, so the snow can leave for good. I cleared the leaves out of the flower garden, just itching to get them started! Also, SNOW CONES!

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? Thinking about mother's day. Its going to be different, because people will see I have a baby and I know they will treat me differently. I love being a mother to both my children, it just hurt not to be acknowledged before by people who knew about our loss. 
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) Landon will be 4 in June. I call him Stinkbug and Sweetpea, and have since he was a baby. My brother calls him Lando but other than that he really doesn't have a nickname.

    Do you have any upcoming milestones? His 4th birthday the first week of June! Crazy! We also have his annual IEP coming up (he has had significant speech delays) and we are excited to hear what his teachers have to say, since we feel like he is improving a lot.

    How has this week been for you? Pretty good. We are house hunting and waiting to hear back on an offer we put in. So exciting and ready to get packing and moving and working on the new house!

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? Playing outside, getting some time in our pool before we move, yard saling, less laundry (silly I know - but laundry is so much easier in the summer with less clothes!).

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? All the house stuff. And realizing how sad I am that we don't need a room for Colton. I find myself thinking as we've looked at houses "these would be the boys rooms, I mean, kids rooms, well, maybe, if we have another. Okay this is Landon's room and then a spare, just in case..." Makes me sad.

    I've also really been struggling with feeling like having Landon causes Colton to be even easier forgotten. Like at Easter, there was no mention of him at all while we were with family and everything was about Landon and that just hurts, but then, i don't know how to change it. Landon is here and Colton isn't.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers

    Me: 32 DH: 33  High School Sweethearts  Married 5/28/2005
    DS1 born 6/5/10 at 40 weeks via emergency c-section due to fetal distress and IUGR caused by placental insufficiency
    DS2 born still 8/28/13 at 32 weeks via emergency c-section due to a complete placental abruption - cause unknown
    Baby #3 on the way, EDD 2/29/16.  Originally twins, but we said goodbye to Baby B at 8 weeks.
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  • My nickname for Aubrey is Bug. It started as "bugaboo", then "bugger"and now just Bug. She'll be ten months next week.

    Milestones: Just mothers day coming up. It's my first mothers day with a living child so that will be different. In the past I've sort of hibernated through mothers day but I don't think that will be possible this year.

    This week was alright. Had some ups and downs. I was on school vacation so I got lots of time with Aubrey, that was great! DH and I had our share of spats this week though. All based around my mood and how he deals with it (or doesn't). I admit I haven't been a ray of sunshine lately but I feel like I'm justified in that.

    This spring I'm looking forward to yard work! Last year at this time I was already about 7 months pregnant so I wasn't able to do much around the yard, which I love. This year I have a slew of projects to keep me busy (if my wallet allows me).

    Open topic: today was our MOD walk. It was sort if a disaster. The weather was terrible. DD was overwhelmed by the crowd and cried mist of the time. FIL quit early because of hip pain. MIL threw a hissy fit because DH asked her to let DD sleep. DH didn't even finish the walk with me because he took dd to the car to calm down and therefore didn't get to see our team sign. There were several mistakes made in our team sign regarding my angels: first they listed baby gary as Gary Jr.That's my husband. Our son was Gary III. Then they referred to Riley as our daughter. I've said here before that I always felt in my heart that Riley was a boy and often refer to him as so, but in all honesty we don't know Riley's gender which is why I didn't say either way. No one thing was terrible but all the little things added up to make it disappointing. To top it off not one person mentioned my angels today! Not even DH, until I was crying in the car on the way home. I thought someone would say something, but not a word from anyone. It just makes me so sad to know how infrequently people think of them. I guess it shouldn't surprise me... they didn't love then the way that I did. I just thought that maybe today all of my children could be recognized. It just hurts because I never stop thinking of them.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    image



  • @lrichmond86

    I am so sorry the walk ended up being a disaster and especially that no one mentioned your sons. I would be disappointed by the sign as well. Just remember the people who walk for their memory, even if they didnt mention them. It is so hard that people have no idea just how important it is for us to HEAR our babies names. They are always close to our hearts and minds, and a little aknowledgment goes a very long way.
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


  • Noethola said:

    @lrichmond86


    I am so sorry the walk ended up being a disaster and especially that no one mentioned your sons. I would be disappointed by the sign as well. Just remember the people who walk for their memory, even if they didnt mention them. It is so hard that people have no idea just how important it is for us to HEAR our babies names. They are always close to our hearts and minds, and a little aknowledgment goes a very long way.
    I do. And I'm so appreciative of those who came to walk. It just still stings when they're overlooked. Even today Aubrey was the star when it should have been her brothers for once.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    image



  • @lrichmond86‌ - I'm so sorry your walk was disappointing - how upsetting! Your boys know you love them! We too are dealing with the issues of Landon getting all the attention, and it's hard to see Colton completely forgotten, or at least not mentioned, by our families.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers

    Me: 32 DH: 33  High School Sweethearts  Married 5/28/2005
    DS1 born 6/5/10 at 40 weeks via emergency c-section due to fetal distress and IUGR caused by placental insufficiency
    DS2 born still 8/28/13 at 32 weeks via emergency c-section due to a complete placental abruption - cause unknown
    Baby #3 on the way, EDD 2/29/16.  Originally twins, but we said goodbye to Baby B at 8 weeks.
  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) She's just over 5 weeks.  I call her so many things, Emmy (name is Emily), bug, booger, boo, bugaboo

    Do you have any upcoming milestones?  Mother's Day

    How has this week been for you?  Pretty good, MH went back to work this week and I was pretty productive with him gone.

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? Getting out for walks and being more free to come and go.

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?  I've noticed lately that even people who have always been supportive and acknowledged my angel have been saying things lately that irk me, like "I'm glad you're finally a mom", and referring to my rainbow as my dad's first grandchild.  Given who is saying these things they are likely innocent faux pas and they don't mean anything by it, but I still want to scream, I've been a mom for over a year and my dad has TWO granddaughters.
    Lilypie - (fm2j)

    Lilypie - (YesX)

     My Pregnancy/Parenting BLOG TTC since 5/2011, BFP #1 12/3/11, M/C 12/7/11 @ 4wks 2d. Began seeing RE Sep 2012. October 2012 Metformin 1500 mg= ovulation on CD34 BFP#2 11/14/12 9DPO, EDD 7/26/13, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks, our angel born sleeping 3/24/13 @ 22wks 2d. BFP #3 7/4/13 8DPO EDD 3/22/14, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks. started insulin @16 wks.  Our rainbow, born 3/19/14 @ 39wks 6d., we're so in love!

    image

  • Katie is two. She has so many nicknames but I love Katie girl the
    best.

    She turns three in June. Ben's due date was six days before. I anticipate that will be difficult.

    It has been busy. I'm getting ready to go back to work on the 6th. I've been visiting work and trying to finish up projects around the house. She has had a tough time lately so we are looking forward to her first therapy appointment on Friday.

    I'm anxious about summer because of Ben's due date. It's been six weeks now and I still find myself figuring out what I should be doing. I know this summer will be hard because I should be juggling how to parent two children and instead I will be parenting one and mourning the other. :(
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

  • Hugs! @lexusolsen I hope the therapy sessions really help her!
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?)
    Jacob is almost 6 and Eli is 8 weeks. Jacob gets called J a lot or jay bird by my parents. I call Eli "stink" a lot.

    Do you have any upcoming milestones?
    Mother's Day

    How has this week been for you?
    Exhausting. I am starting to get anxious about returning to work the last week of May.

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)?
    I want to get out of the house more, walks, bike rides, going to the coast, etc. And I plan to do minor gardening.

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?
    I am frustrated with J because he pooped his pants twice this weekend and we have caught him trying to poop his pants several times the last few weeks. He will go into his room to try and poop instead of going to the bathroom. I am not convinced it is related to the new baby because we've had poop issues with him before and he tries to hide it and clean up so we don't know he did it. It is so frustrating.
    Married 11/23/11, TTC starting 10/12, BFP#1 11/30/12, Adoption of stepson finalized 03/19/13,Loss of our daughter at 20w4d due to incompetent cervix 03/27/13, BFP#2 06/28/13, DS2 born 3/1/14.

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) 
    SS, James, is 7 - I call him J.  DS, Liam, is 2 weeks today!  Don't know if we have a favorite nickname yet.

    Do you have any upcoming milestones?
    Mother's Day and then my birthday and the triplet's birthday is later in May...

    How has this week been for you?
    It's been rough, but reminding myself that my hormones are still trying to balance (lots of highs and lows...).  The hardest part of this week was balancing the routine we had started created with DS and incoroporating SS into it (we have SS 50% of the time/week).

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)?
    Nice weather!  We've been getting out and taking a walk every day that it isn't raining and I want to continue that!  (And soak up a little sun at some point...)

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week?
    DH is back to work this week (though he's working from home for most of the week) ... so just looking forward to figuring out our day with the little guy!

    ~ Leah, Rachel and Gabriel were born on May 27, 2013 (23 weeks) ~ Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) Anna is 15.5 months old (12.5 adjusted). I call her Banana or Booger Bear. DH calls her Annapigen which means Anna girl in Danish. 

    Do you have any upcoming milestones? May 30 was Patricia's due date. Each year it seems to hurt less but it will always be in my mind because it's also my brother's birthday.

    How has this week been for you? All over the place! After her first aquatic therapy session on Wednesday Anna came down with a fever which was strange. With everything she's been through, she's never had a fever! Thankfully it went away. Saturday I threw a baby shower for my best friend who is now more pregnant than I've ever been with a healthy boy (thank goodness for that!). I am happy for her and she's been SUCH an amazing friend to me through both girls but it still hurts my heart.  

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? Spring has pretty much come and gone here and the heat has arrived, ugh. It's already too hot to take Anna for walks after work so I go by myself once I put her down. But soon the pool will be 80 degrees and it'll be swim time!

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? Now that the baby shower I planned is over, my focus is on our trip to Europe next month. Our mini trip over Spring Break did not go well so I am worried!! Hopefully 2 months will help with Anna's ability to be flexible and she won't have teeth coming...


      Our Angel Patricia born sleeping 3/30/12 at 31 weeks
    Our Fighter Anna born early 1/8/13 at 26 weeks
    Hoping to bring home #3 due 9/9/15
  • I haven't been in a very supportive place lately, but I'm back there now. This will be a post and run, but I'll be back to read everyone else's posts!


    How old is/are your children and what are/is your favorite nickname for them (and why?) JJ is 5 and certainly acting like a 5-year-old. It's almost like the Terrible Twos all over again some days. Mia will be three months old next week and is adorable, but she has a crappy cough that won't go away. I call my son JBear...not sure why, but it's cute. And I still call my daughter sweet pea [a nickname I gave her while I was pregnant], as well as Mia Mia. :)


    Do you have any upcoming milestones? I just want to get through Mother's Day. The anticipation is killing me. I thought it might be better this year because we have Mia, but nope. I think Mother's Day will be hard for a few more years, at least.

    How has this week been for you? This whole month has been an absolute blur. Things are starting to go better mentally and marriage-wise, but it's still a struggle some days to put on a happy face. I'm finally moving forward from the overwhelming beginnings of parenting a newborn after a loss, and I'm starting to feel better.

    QOTW: What are you looking forward to now that spring has arrived (or so we hope!)? I can't wait to spend more time outdoors with the kids. JJ loves being outside, so I look forward to taking them to the park and going for walks on the paths they have out there. We also love the zoo, so we have a lot of zoo trips in our future!

    Open Topic. What is on your mind this week? I'm so glad I'm out of the early days funk that I was in. I feel alive again, partly because I'm getting more sleep, partly because things at home are going better, and partly because I'm not as overwhelmed with our rainbow being at home. I want more children, but this whole PgAL/PAL stuff is really making me reconsider. It's so stressful for me.

    ________________________________________________________________________________


    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • NoetholaNoethola member
    edited April 2014
    @osuwifey09 Been thinking about you and praying for you over the last few weeks. If you ever need real life support, I'm in Cincy. I know you have a lot going on, but we could meet up if you just need a RL person to talk to. So glad things are going better and the "new parent haze" is lifting a little!
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


  • @OSUWifey09‌ - so glad to hear things are getting better! You have been heavy on my heart so I'm glad to see this update!
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers

    Me: 32 DH: 33  High School Sweethearts  Married 5/28/2005
    DS1 born 6/5/10 at 40 weeks via emergency c-section due to fetal distress and IUGR caused by placental insufficiency
    DS2 born still 8/28/13 at 32 weeks via emergency c-section due to a complete placental abruption - cause unknown
    Baby #3 on the way, EDD 2/29/16.  Originally twins, but we said goodbye to Baby B at 8 weeks.
  • @OSUWifey09‌ - glad to see you're back and pushing through! I've thought about you! xoxo
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