I need some advice from the MoMs

BabyVDM

My twin girls are just about 8 weeks (adjusted age of 5).

My Mom has been with us and helping me to care for the babies, but she left 2 days ago.  I am alone with the babies.

I am afraid that I do not know how to give them each enough interaction, cuddle, and comfort.  I keep trying to figure this out.  But all I can think of is that somehow by trying to divide my time between them I am not giving either of them any quality time.

I can't figure out how to give Beatrice tummy time while I am comforting a crying Patricia.  I don't know how to coo coo and talk to Patricia when I need to cuddle Beatrice and vice versa.

How did you manage this?  Is it unrealistic?

hayleydeee

You will find your grove. But, it takes a while, hang in there. It sounds like you are doing fine. There is only one of you, and you can only do so much. Just remember you're doing the best you can, and comfort whoever is crying the loudest! 

CNYBride05

I think every MoM feels this way at the beginning (and later on too!). Don't worry about being "fair" and just cuddle whoever needs to be cuddled. It gets easier!

ballygirl

Ugh those first few months were so hard! I felt like I was always just calming a crying baby and the happy one got no attention. Then when they both cried at the same time, I would usually just end up crying with them because it was impossible to calm them both.

All I can say is that it gets much easier. I think 4 month was a turning point for me. They become more aware and respond to your face and voice, so then I could hold a crying baby but still interact with the other one if she needed it.

raraavis28

Yeah those first few weeks are very hard.....but ditto PPs; you will get the hang of it. Try to not judge yourself as you care for them. Of course it is impossible to give your 100% undivided attention to both babies at the same time, but doing your best is good enough. So much of being a MoM is figuring out how to triage every situation....but it does get easier!

LittleLady77

I'm 4 weeks in and I feel the same way. I'm always worried they don't get cuddled enough. So far baby wearing had really helped. I also like to prop them sitting up on a pillow and interact with them both like that.

PurpleIris30

This is one of the hard parts of having twins, but you'll figure out how to manage.

I did one up, both up at night, but stopped doing it during the day. One of the reasons was because I didn't mind if they were on different schedules because it gave me the opportunity to have some one-on-one time with each baby. With cluster feeding, they ended up on the same schedule by night anyway. You'll figure out what system works best for you.

BeckyP005

Hi girl! Just wanted to say the picture of thr babies in your siggy is just adorable!! I'm sure your doing a great job! Hang in there

Pittpanther

PurpleIris30 said:

This is one of the hard parts of having twins, but you'll figure out how to manage.

I did one up, both up at night, but stopped doing it during the day. One of the reasons was because I didn't mind if they were on different schedules because it gave me the opportunity to have some one-on-one time with each baby. With cluster feeding, they ended up on the same schedule by night anyway. You'll figure out what system works best for you.

This exactly! We only do one up both up at night as well and during the day I try my best to stagger so they can each have their own snuggles during feedings at least. This has worked well for us so far. Good luck! It does get easier as time goes in.

BabyVDM

Pittpanther said:

This is one of the hard parts of having twins, but you'll figure out how to manage. I did one up, both up at night, but stopped doing it during the day. One of the reasons was because I didn't mind if they were on different schedules because it gave me the opportunity to have some one-on-one time with each baby. With cluster feeding, they ended up on the same schedule by night anyway. You'll figure out what system works best for you.

This exactly! We only do one up both up at night as well and during the day I try my best to stagger so they can each have their own snuggles during feedings at least. This has worked well for us so far. Good luck! It does get easier as time goes in.

Funnily enough I've been doing this by default, but feeling like a failure because I couldn't keep them fed at the same schedule throughout the day.  But I feel like Beatrice is on a growth spurt and is waking every 2.5 hours while Patricia is happy to lay in for almost 4. 

It's good to know that these feelings are all normal for a new MoM. 

BabyVDM

So glad you are here! 

Congratulations on your babies!

southerncharm24

Hey fellow march momma turned february momma! Not much advice, just wanted yo say we are just days apart and in the same boat. Thinking of you!!