Can I do a NCDR UO today?

jcwinsto

I'm setting here listening to my coworkers talk.  One guy and his wife just had a new baby and I asked if the baby was still waking a lot at night and he said yes that she is waking every 2 hours.  He then said it was because his wife was BFing and that BM is so thin and there is not much to it that she is not satisfied and it doesn't fill her up.  I tried to explain why they feed more often on BM but it just wasn't getting through.  And then my other coworker chimed in that yea she understands because her son was born at 10 lbs and just wasn't getting satisfied with BM so she switched him to formula with rice cereal in it at 3 DAYS!!!  I stepped back and stopped commenting at that point.  The conversation then went on with comments to the effect that if they just fed the babies formula they would be sleeping for 6 hours (at like a week old).  The guy even made the comment that since his wife wanted to EBF that it was on her to wake and feed the baby and take care of it.  That is kind of a duh comment but he made it sound like he wasn't giving her very much support over the decision. 

There is just so much wrong with the whole conversation.  Recently I've noticed that I've been given an amazing amount of bad advice on feeding my baby.  Just the other day a women who is supposed to be educated in the development of babies and toddlers suggested I start giving my baby extra water so that he "learns to like it now" so I won't have problems later on.  I can't count the number of times I've been asked if I'm feeding him cereal yet or purees or "Why isn't he STTN yet? Just give him some cereal and you'll both get a good nights sleep."  I just want to tell everyone "How do you think women and babies did it 100 years ago before formula and rice cereal?" 

Ugh. Sorry for the notclothdiaperness complaint.  I've just got to talk about it somewhere.  No one else IRL (besides my very supportive and understanding husband) seems to get it.  And just for clarification purposes I'm not what you could term extreme in my views.  I currently don't plan to do extended BFing and I will probably introduce solids of some form as soon as he shows an interest or maybe just a touch of cereal before bed at 4 months if the pedi okays it and we are still having sleeping problems.

TJ1979

I was right behind you high-fiving you all the way, till you got to your disclaimer section.  I didn't realize I was being "extreme" by not forcing my baby to eat pureed jarred meat paste before she could even sit up on her own.  Or ever.
But you're right.  People give out way too much terrible advice.  My SMIL suggested I give E the powdered jello mix mixed with water in a bottle.  At 3 weeks old.  What possible reason could that be good?
I have no problem with people choosing formula for whatever reason.  But formula and rice cereal to force a 3 week old to "STTN" is ridiculous. 

Unknown

This content has been removed.

Rrrrrachel

That makes me ragey. Just FYI no legit science points to cereal helping babies sleep better at any age, and there definitely is legit science supporting delaying solids to six months, although not all peds are up on it. You may also want to check out dr Greene and what he has on his website about rice cereal (google dr Greene white out should bring it right up)

jcwinsto

TJ1979 said:

I was right behind you high-fiving you all the way, till you got to your disclaimer section.  I didn't realize I was being "extreme" by not forcing my baby to eat pureed jarred meat paste before she could even sit up on her own.  Or ever.
But you're right.  People give out way too much terrible advice.  My SMIL suggested I give E the powdered jello mix mixed with water in a bottle.  At 3 weeks old.  What possible reason could that be good?
I have no problem with people choosing formula for whatever reason.  But formula and rice cereal to force a 3 week old to "STTN" is ridiculous. 

Oh, I'm mostly not in to the purees either.  I'll keep some on hand just for convienience at times but we are going the BLW route mostly.  And what purees I do have are going to be "normal" things like applesauce, pears, peaches, peas, etc.  No meats or crazy concoctions. Oh and it was 3 DAYS!  My jaw almost dropped at that comment.  Formula is fine.  Force feeding several ounces with rice cereal before bed in not fine.

 

SecretAgentKate said:

my friend who is currently bf her 15 month old said that as her daughter was latched on in the ped's office the other day, her doc told her that there's absolutely no value to breastfeeding after a year and that she was setting her baby up to have more cavities down the road because of extended breastfeeding. she was appalled.  i was appalled for her.

and as a random anecdote, my breastfed oldest son slept through the night at 2.5 weeks old.  my breastfed second son slept through the night starting at 4 weeks old.  (then there's the third one who i'm still happy if he only gets up twice a night )

smh. Extended bfing is great if that's what you want to do.  I just don't enjoy bfing enough to continue past a year or so.  In fact I'm hoping to build enough stash to be able to stop a little sooner.   Extreme isn't really the right word for what I meant.  Just not as usual as only bfing to a year.

Rrrrrachel said:

That makes me ragey. Just FYI no legit science points to cereal helping babies sleep better at any age, and there definitely is legit science supporting delaying solids to six months, although not all peds are up on it. You may also want to check out dr Greene and what he has on his website about rice cereal (google dr Greene white out should bring it right up)

I haven't read that yet but I will.  Really the only reason I'm thinking about trying (if it doesn't work then it doesn't and I stop feeding it) is if I can feed a little bit made with BM after his nighttime feed and get him to sleep 4 hours rather than 2.  It's killing me to get up every 2ish hours and then go to work all day.  He's just hungry enough by that time that there is no way to get him back down without feeding.  We've tried.  And MH can't afford to go to work groggy either.  We both work in jobs that we need to be focused and awake just for the safety aspect.

huntjul

Everyone's got an opinion these days, yet only I seem to have mine.

jcwinsto

potterowl said:

Ugh! that is awful! Do you want to hear an amazing EBF story to feel better?

My coworker had her baby last week. She delivered naturally with 4 pushes! She then lost about half her blood and was rushed to surgery. Her baby was fed ONLY donor milk. The hospital pushed an S and S system. at 6 days old they are both home and successfully exclusively breastfeeding. Her little guy has not had one drop of formula and is doing great. And she is doing great. 

That is wonderful! My hospital was very pro BFing but I imagine in that situation he would have recieved formula at least until I was in the room after recovery.

Rrrrrachel

Everyone wants their babies to sleep longer. If it worked everyone would do it.

Amores0121

Ugh. Some people are just clueless. I only BF for 8 to 10 weeks, but my DD was also sleeping through the night at that point. Every baby is just different. I feel for you, having to wake every 2 hours and go to work! you must be exhausted!! I hope he starts sleeping for longer stretches soon!

LatteLady5

I know hind site is 20/20 but I wouldn't have kept my mouth shut. If people want to feed their babies rice cereal, that's their business BUT I'm not cool with the spreading of misinformation.

Yes, a breastfed baby typically needs to eat more often but that's because breast milk is the perfect food for babies and their little bodies digest it easily and quickly. Formula isn't evil but breast milk is better. There's no need to sugar coat it, that's the truth. Babies don't need solids at one week...or even at 4 months. They just don't. It doesn't make them sleep longer either. There are FF babies that sleep like crap and breastfed babies that sleep like champs. The first 6 weeks of their life is like a constant growth spurt. Nursing a newborn is hard work and all consuming. If I didn't have the support of my husband I don't know what I would do. It really sounds like that poor woman's husband is a super jerk and I feel for her.

I hate the stupid "just feed them formula" mentality. Too many of my friends have had to stop breastfeeding because they have to go back to work and don't have the resources and support to continue. Misinformation like the conversation you overheard play into this and it's not right.

And I'm with TJ. Don't feed your baby rice cereal at 4months. I tried purees with DD and she hated them. I fell into BLW before I knew it was a thing and it's so much easier.

BoyOhBoys

I read somewhere (forgive my laziness for not going to look for it) that newborns NEED to wake constantly. it's part of how they grow and develop. It's just for a short time in your life. Suck it up!

 

This is what I tell myself with BF too. I feel so trapped right now, like I can't do anything but BF. This is only a year (give or take) out of my life and such a great thing for LO that I just need to "suck it up" for a few more months.

Rrrrrachel

Yeah the non supportive husband is what really pisses me off the most.

LatteLady5

BoyOhBoys said:

I read somewhere (forgive my laziness for not going to look for it) that newborns NEED to wake constantly. it's part of how they grow and develop. It's just for a short time in your life. Suck it up!

 

This is what I tell myself with BF too. I feel so trapped right now, like I can't do anything but BF. This is only a year (give or take) out of my life and such a great thing for LO that I just need to "suck it up" for a few more months.

How old is your baby? The first 4 months of BFing DD for me were so hard. She sucked at latching and I had to coax her on the breast with a paci...I cried so much during that time. If I wasn't so stubborn and determined to prove people wrong I would have quit.

After 4 months it got better and by 8-10ish it was easy and convenient. I nursed for a year and a half. If you're just at the beginning, I promise it gets better and you're right, it's just for such a short time. You have a good mentality though. It's only for a little while

BoyOhBoys

LatteLady5 said:

BoyOhBoys said:

I read somewhere (forgive my laziness for not going to look for it) that newborns NEED to wake constantly. it's part of how they grow and develop. It's just for a short time in your life. Suck it up!

 

This is what I tell myself with BF too. I feel so trapped right now, like I can't do anything but BF. This is only a year (give or take) out of my life and such a great thing for LO that I just need to "suck it up" for a few more months.

How old is your baby? The first 4 months of BFing DD for me were so hard. She sucked at latching and I had to coax her on the breast with a paci...I cried so much during that time. If I wasn't so stubborn and determined to prove people wrong I would have quit.

After 4 months it got better and by 8-10ish it was easy and convenient. I nursed for a year and a half. If you're just at the beginning, I promise it gets better and you're right, it's just for such a short time. You have a good mentality though. It's only for a little while

He just turned 5 months. I feed on demand and he seems to always demand! I was thinking of starting a garden but, who am I kidding? When I get home from work he comes at me with mouth open and legs kicking and won't let me put him down. I am trying to babywear but I am not good at it yet.

 

Thank you for the hope!

jcwinsto

It's not that I hate BFing.  It's easy and it's convenient and we don't have problems and we feed on demand.  It's just that I don't enjoy the actual feel of bfing.  It's the sensation that I don't like.  No matter what, this kid will primarily be bf, or if I end up with supply issues, formula fed for his first year.  That's where the nutrition is at.  As far as the rice thing goes I'm really just thinking about it.  I would definately wait until 4 months and if I do give some to him it would only be a tiny, thin amount made with BM after his bed time feeding.  And I am planning on making my own by grinding brown rice.  The whole idea behind this is that maybe the little extra fiber in the brown rice will help keep his belly full for 3-4 hours rather than 2.  I can totally handle waking once a night to feed him.  Like I stated before it's the waking every 2 hours that is a problem.  Both MH and I need to be alert at work because otherwise it is a safety issue that could affect not only us but also coworkers at times.  I'm definately not planning on making rice cereal a constant in his diet at any time in the future.  And if it doesn't work for this purpose then I would just stop giving it to him.  I really don't think he should be STTN yet anyways.  He's a tiny baby that needs lots of milk to grow.

freezorburn

Hang in there everyone! Those early weeks and months can be brutal. And you all deserve props for arming yourselves with the best information that you can, given all of the misinformation that is out there.

One of the things that sticks with me as I read everyone's stories is that new parents need more time and more support to care for their babies, and the US is seriously behind other developed countries on this. It's been interesting to live in the UK during this period of our lives, because I've met so many women who have taken 6-12 months off of work and get at least partial pay. When I look back at my own BF relationship with DS, I feel like if we had been living at home in the US, we would have been struggling with feeding issues just as I was expected to be back at work. 6-12 months is so much more reasonable from a developmental point of view. I know it's difficult to change work culture, but I can't help but hope that things will improve for families with new babies in the future.

Rrrrrachel

I was up every two hours with my daughter until she was almost two. Even after she started solids.

haileyq

freezorburn said:

Hang in there everyone! Those early weeks and months can be brutal. And you all deserve props for arming yourselves with the best information that you can, given all of the misinformation that is out there.

One of the things that sticks with me as I read everyone's stories is that new parents need more time and more support to care for their babies, and the US is seriously behind other developed countries on this. It's been interesting to live in the UK during this period of our lives, because I've met so many women who have taken 6-12 months off of work and get at least partial pay. When I look back at my own BF relationship with DS, I feel like if we had been living at home in the US, we would have been struggling with feeding issues just as I was expected to be back at work. 6-12 months is so much more reasonable from a developmental point of view. I know it's difficult to change work culture, but I can't help but hope that things will improve for families with new babies in the future.

How true is this! Going back to work at 6 or even 12 weeks PP is just brutal. I work in a busy ER and all of these well educated nurses quit pumping so early because it is just so difficult. Yes, we all know that employers are "required" to let you go pump but are you really going to stop chest compressions so you can go pump? It's just really hard to go back to work so early and nurse. So many women in the U.S. have to choose between family and career or end up doing each half way, what an unfair and difficult choice.

Amores0121

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

freezorburn

bookitup said:

freezorburn said:

Hang in there everyone! Those early weeks and months can be brutal. And you all deserve props for arming yourselves with the best information that you can, given all of the misinformation that is out there.

One of the things that sticks with me as I read everyone's stories is that new parents need more time and more support to care for their babies, and the US is seriously behind other developed countries on this. It's been interesting to live in the UK during this period of our lives, because I've met so many women who have taken 6-12 months off of work and get at least partial pay. When I look back at my own BF relationship with DS, I feel like if we had been living at home in the US, we would have been struggling with feeding issues just as I was expected to be back at work. 6-12 months is so much more reasonable from a developmental point of view. I know it's difficult to change work culture, but I can't help but hope that things will improve for families with new babies in the future.

Wow, 6-12 months? That sounds amazing. Side topic, but how does the UK rate as far as equality in the workforce? Do men get paternity leave? Are women generally paid less across the board?

Here's what gov.uk says about Paternity leave. I do know of one couple who took advantage of this, the husband took maybe 5-6 weeks off to cover wife's transition back to work/ settling the baby in to daycare.

I'm not sure about workforce equality. Probably depends on the industry. I'll keep my eyes open for information on this.

freezorburn

Amores0121 said:

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

Oh, man. Pumping is so much work! Not to mention keeping everything clean. IMHO pumping for a few feeds a day makes sense for some people. I think there are some extreme situations where EP is what someone has to do to keep their baby fed, but I personally don't understand why anyone would choose to EP. Babies are way more efficient than pumps. 

Some practical things YH can do to be supportive: 

• Keep pitchers/glasses of drinking water filled and in arms reach of any place that you will be parking yourself to BF.
  
• Keep the fridge full of meals that you can just pull out and eat, at most microwave. (DS was not an efficient nurser -- I never had time to cook!)
  
• When eating out -- Unless you develop the skilz to BF hands free, he can also help by making sure everything on your plate is small enough to pick up with a fork. Or he can hold and soothe the baby while you eat. BF will make you hungry.
  
• If you are planning to pump at all, YH would have an important role in bottle training -- some BF babies are reluctant to drink pumped milk out of a bottle, especially if they know mom is nearby. This is why we failed to bottle train DS, because I didn't have consistent help with bottle training. BF is a wonderful thing, but I would have loved to be able to have someone else feed him now and again.
  

nanabanana06

I'm pretty sure the AAP doesn't even recommend cereal at 4 months anymore. Rice cereal isn't very good for them either. It's empty calories and has no nutritional value. Plus there's a debate whether or not it contains a safe amount of arsenic. I'm in the food before 1 is just for fun camp. BF or Formula is best and should be #1 in their diet. I'm not trying to be snarky. I'm just pointing it out.

Also, I never understood the whole purees being convenient when going out. I kind of think they are the opposite of convenient. Cuz then when you go out your lugging around jars of food, dirty spoons, bibs, ect. You then have to stop whatever your doing while your out and spoon feed. It always seemed easier to just order a side plate of veggies or take a little of what I'm eating off my plate when we went out for the day. Less stuff to drag around.

Loriimagination

Amores0121 said:

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

My husband was on board with BFing from day one but the very best thing we did was take a child birth class that had one day deicated to BFing education. It was with a awesome childbirth educator/lactation consultant. He was amazed by all the benifits for the baby and for me. It definitely made a huge difference with getting lots of support from him and he really got to see the mechanics of it too. If you have something like that in your area I highly recommend it.

Loriimagination

BoyOhBoys said:

LatteLady5 said:

BoyOhBoys said:

I read somewhere (forgive my laziness for not going to look for it) that newborns NEED to wake constantly. it's part of how they grow and develop. It's just for a short time in your life. Suck it up!

 

This is what I tell myself with BF too. I feel so trapped right now, like I can't do anything but BF. This is only a year (give or take) out of my life and such a great thing for LO that I just need to "suck it up" for a few more months.

How old is your baby? The first 4 months of BFing DD for me were so hard. She sucked at latching and I had to coax her on the breast with a paci...I cried so much during that time. If I wasn't so stubborn and determined to prove people wrong I would have quit.

After 4 months it got better and by 8-10ish it was easy and convenient. I nursed for a year and a half. If you're just at the beginning, I promise it gets better and you're right, it's just for such a short time. You have a good mentality though. It's only for a little while

He just turned 5 months. I feed on demand and he seems to always demand! I was thinking of starting a garden but, who am I kidding? When I get home from work he comes at me with mouth open and legs kicking and won't let me put him down. I am trying to babywear but I am not good at it yet.

 

Thank you for the hope!

Have you tried a Mei tai style carrier. My LO had always liked to nurse a lot and I can do it completely hands free in a Mei tai. I had an infantino one first and it worked great but I just upgraded to a Tula and I'm in love with it. He usually nurses to sleep in it.

nanabanana06

Loriimagination said:

LatteLady5 said:

BoyOhBoys said:

I read somewhere (forgive my laziness for not going to look for it) that newborns NEED to wake constantly. it's part of how they grow and develop. It's just for a short time in your life. Suck it up!

 

This is what I tell myself with BF too. I feel so trapped right now, like I can't do anything but BF. This is only a year (give or take) out of my life and such a great thing for LO that I just need to "suck it up" for a few more months.

How old is your baby? The first 4 months of BFing DD for me were so hard. She sucked at latching and I had to coax her on the breast with a paci...I cried so much during that time. If I wasn't so stubborn and determined to prove people wrong I would have quit.

After 4 months it got better and by 8-10ish it was easy and convenient. I nursed for a year and a half. If you're just at the beginning, I promise it gets better and you're right, it's just for such a short time. You have a good mentality though. It's only for a little while

He just turned 5 months. I feed on demand and he seems to always demand! I was thinking of starting a garden but, who am I kidding? When I get home from work he comes at me with mouth open and legs kicking and won't let me put him down. I am trying to babywear but I am not good at it yet.

 

Thank you for the hope!

Have you tried a Mai tai style carrier. My LO had always liked to nurse a lot and I can do it completely hands free in a Mai tai. I had an infantino one first and it worked great but I just upgraded to a Tula and I'm in love with it. He usually nurses to sleep in it.

The best and easiest carrier for nursing is actually a ring sling. SSC's and Mei Tai's are kind of tricky to nurse in.

jane8188

@Nana_Osaki06‌ - sorry to get away from topic. What is the best position to nurse in a rs? I have a ktan from my son but I didn't really like it. New babe is due any day now and I only have money for 1 new carrier at the moment. I was looking at a woven and want a linen blend. Biggest thing is nursing in it. Opinions on what you would get? Is there a huge temp difference between cotton and cotton/linen blend? All I have right now is a standard kp which clearly won't work for a nb.

nanabanana06

Ring slings are really good for nursing. When they are little you can do a cradle hold and nurse, when they get bigger you just loosen it up a bit and lower them down so you can easily put the boob in their face. I have a ring sling and a woven. I do love them both. Linen is good for warmer temps, but can be a real bitch to break in.

LatteLady5

freezorburn said:

One of the things that sticks with me as I read everyone's stories is that new parents need more time and more support to care for their babies, and the US is seriously behind other developed countries on this. It's been interesting to live in the UK during this period of our lives, because I've met so many women who have taken 6-12 months off of work and get at least partial pay. When I look back at my own BF relationship with DS, I feel like if we had been living at home in the US, we would have been struggling with feeding issues just as I was expected to be back at work. 6-12 months is so much more reasonable from a developmental point of view. I know it's difficult to change work culture, but I can't help but hope that things will improve for families with new babies in the future.

I agree with this entirely. The US sucks at giving mothers adequate time off. I am in a position to SAH but if I had to return to work I couldn't have kept BFing DD. I was just having this conversation with a friend the other day because she had to stop BFing at 8weeks because there wasn't enough time/space/support at work. IMO that's just not right. Women of all income levels should be able to BF but until people start recognizing BF as important and beneficial and offering more support for moms things just won't change.

Chichigo

My husband received the book "The Expectant Father" as a gift from two different men. He also attended childbirth and breastfeeding classes with me. We've had plenty of problems since our son was born, but he has always provided the support I have needed with breastfeeding.

I agree with @Nana_Osaki06‌ about the ring sling. The only benefit the Ergo has over the ring sling (when it comes to nursing) is a hood that snaps in place. It keeps Mr. Noseypants' attention on his milk.

LatteLady5

I have a pouch that's easy to BF in. The mei tai is kind of annoying and I'm not very good at nursing in it without having to awkwardly adjust and retie and I usually end up waking him up.

JEPES1348

Amores0121 said:

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

Ugh, I EP, and it's a drag. LO was born 2 months premature and spent the first month of life in the hospital. We were encouraged to latch and nurse in the hospital, but she also had to eat bottles of milk fortified for extra calories to gain weight. Once home, we nursed and continued fortified BM and had weekly or bi monthly weight checks. Once the weight was stabilized we dropped the fortification, and just breast or bottle fed. Since we spend so many months on the bottle, LO preferred it- it was faster and less work. She still will latch and nurse for comfort, but wants a bottle for full meals. I especially hated when she was in the hospital and I had to wake up during the night to an alarm (not a crying baby) to have a relationship with my pump. It was so unnatural. Fast forward 9.5 months and here I am, and I've pumped almost exclusively since Day 1. It's not easy on the psyche. At this point pumping everyday 4-8 times a day is eye twitch-inducing. But LO loves it, and I'll do anything for her. She's also showing tons of interest in whatever we're eating, so there is light at the end of the tunnel. I don't know how long she'll want BM, but since it's not going to be a matter of turning away from the breast I wonder if she'll have that innate urge to wean. At this point our eating journey is one big unknown, and I'm okay with that. It's hard to have a set plan, because the unexpected happens. You'll figure out what works for you and LO and hopefully your H can get on board with your decision.

Edit autocorrect fail

littleredfish

Skimmed the comments and everybody has great points. Just wanted to add if I ever heard DH talk like that about my BF choices, he'd get a karate chop to the throat.

Chichigo

@JEPES1348‌ Maybe she will be more interested in nursing once she's not relying on milk to satisfy her hunger.

TJ1979

Amores0121 said:

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

I really recommend you two taking a BFing class together.  Try your local hospital or La Leche League.  You really need his support.  There will be days (possibly even weeks) that you will want to quit.  And if he's not supporting you, you might.  MH tried hard to support me, but couldn't stand to see me crying all the time.  He offered formula many times, and I was just about to quit.  Then I found the BF board here on TB.  If YH isn't giving you the support you need, please check them out.  My hospital also had a free BF support group once a week.

Mandmeesh

stringy813 said:

Mapleme said:

I was telling DH about BFing in a carrier and he always interprets "carrier" as the car seat, so it brought up a very amusing conversation about my leaning over a car seat on the floor and smacking M in the face with my boob.

I have a friend who said she actually did this once when stuck in traffic with a screaming baby...I don't think it was successful though...but it was a good story to make us be sure we always had a bottle and pump with us if heading out for the day when she was tiny…

I did this!!!! 

when M was about 3 months old (maybe older) we were driving home at night from the ILs.  It was a three-hour freakin' drive.  He was at the newbornish age where he could not calm himself down.  So I definitely leaned over his car seat to nurse him.  We'd already tried pulling over and taking him out to calm, put him back in.  That was worse 

I was very grateful for my nursing boobs to be able to stretch

jcwinsto

MH was completely uneducated about anything baby.  He didn't have a preference one way or another so I just started talking to him and telling him the facts about why it is better to breast feed, etc.  We had some problems in the first month with me being in and out of the hospital and him keeping the baby at home overnight.  I had to pump and he bottle fed when we were apart.  I was also pretty torn up from Hunter nursing and would bleed every time he latched on the left.  I started alternating to pump once and then feed once.  MH really didn't like to see me hurting so he encouraged me to pump when it was this bad but I just told him that I would eventually heal and EBF.  I guess my whole point to this story is that I think he liked giving the bottle every once in awhile because he felt like it was a fun bonding experience and he didn't like to see me in pain when I nursed.  But he did get to see how much a PITA it was to pump.  I made him wash all the pump parts a few times.  And if YH doesn't see that it is twice as much work to pump, feed pumped milk, wash parts, drag twice the equipment everywhere then he needs a good knock upside the head.

freezorburn

@JEPES1348 Wow, you deserve a medal for EP so long! It's so true with feeding issues, though -- when you figure out what works for your LO, you find a way to make it work. Thanks for sharing your story.

BoyOhBoys

I have a RS and aparently too stupid to know how to use it even watching YouTube videos.

jcwinsto

Also, I am not the walking zombie that I have been the last 2 weeks and am currently no longer contemplating early solids.  I think I finally figured out why Hunter wasn't sleeping.  He naturally pushed his bedtime back about a half hour to an hour and he was nursing and falling asleep at the boob and unlatching like he used to and I would put him down and then he would start waking every 2 hours.   I think he was falling asleep at the boob before he ate enough and it just set us up for a bad night.  I'm now waking him back up every time he falls asleep and also feeding both sides before bed and he is now sleeping 6-7 hours instead of 5 from a couple weeks ago. Thank God!!!

BoyOhBoys

YAY!!! Good work Momma!

Amores0121

Loriimagination said:

SInce we are talking about BFing..anyone know a good way to get DH on board with being supportive? He doesn't care how I feed baby either way and even suggested that I EP b/c he thinks "bottles are easier". Tried explaining to him that EP is much more difficult than BF.

He also thinks you can just put the baby up to your nipple and they start drinking. Really has no clue..I've explained to him that it can be difficult and exhausting and needs a lot of support.

Anyone have any suggestions?

My husband was on board with BFing from day one but the very best thing we did was take a child birth class that had one day deicated to BFing education. It was with a awesome childbirth educator/lactation consultant. He was amazed by all the benifits for the baby and for me. It definitely made a huge difference with getting lots of support from him and he really got to see the mechanics of it too. If you have something like that in your area I highly recommend it.

I had thought about this, but IDK if he will do it due to his schedule. He has a lawn care business so he is extremely busy the next few months, and getting him to make it to our birthing class is difficult enough.  I am going to see if my Doula will talk about it at our next prenatal appointment and that way he will get some info.