~*~*Our March Memories~*~*~ (April 21st, 2014)

Frenchteachermama

Hi March Ladies! 
Welcome to the TTCAL March Check in. If you had a March EDD or loss date, no matter which year, you are welcome to join. If you haven't already participated in a check in, please post an intro and tell us a bit about yourself and why you are here. It will be posted weekly in March, and bi-weekly all other times of the year.
The check in list reflects those who have previously posted an intro and checked in recently. If I removed you in error, please let me know!
Weekly Check In:I promise to make things more personal next week, but for now please update us:  How are you feeling, where are you in your cycle, or what are your coping mechanisms.  ((HUGS)) to everyone who needs them!!
@Frenchteachermama 
@HoldingOutHope  
@SamanthaLaura16  
@Jenn0021
@shandorfml2 
@Tablefor5 
@LiaMadi1 
@Zapgurl44 
@Ktlovess
QOTW - I've had a rough couple of days and need to talk about the positive things in my life.  Let's share a few things with each other that we are thankful for or looking forward to in the next few months!!

OUR BADGES

VikingQueen has lovingly made us a Badge
Alilbear has thoughtfully designed this badge for our use as well.



~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*
OUR ANGELS
KMW08 Loss Date 3/3/2012

Vikinggirl4 EDD 3/4/2014

Ktlovess EDD 3/4/2014

KMW08 EDD 3/6/2013

AnyMax EDD 3/7/14

PinkCamino EDD 3/9/13

Zapgurl44 EDD 3/10/14

abryars EDD 3/10/14

Jenn0021 EDD 3/14/11

LiaMadi1 EDD 3/14/14

Belle3184 EDD 3/15/14

Tablefor5 EDD 3/15/14

SamanthaLaura16 EDD 3/16/14

Pink0021 EDD 3/19/13

HoldingOutHope EDD 3/19/14

lindsayhilleary EDD 3/24/14

Shandorfml2 EDD 3/25/13

Drgn30 EDD 3/27/14

alliehaze EDD 3/27/14

JustinsGirl2011 EDD 3/29/14

Frenchteachermama EDD 3/30/14

alilbear EDD 3/31/14

Frenchteachermama

AFM:  I got some pretty upsetting news this weekend that my AMH is very very low.  Basically instead of having a full deck of cards (eggs) left in my body I only have a few.  I've gotten a lot of support from other bumpies but it was a really hard thing to hear and I'm still processing it.  The worst part is that the RE I'm using in upstate NY is mostly run by nurses so I got the news from a nurse who was reading an e-mail from the doctor.  It said something like "tell patient that conceiving naturally or through IUI will be very unlikely and patient should pursue IVF".  WTF!!??  Really, you have a nurse READ me your note?  Needless to say I'm going to be switching RE practices to one that is through the big hospital in my town where patients see the doctors more frequently.  I'm in the middle of my first IUI cycle, responding great to the drugs and all of my other numbers are excellent.  I don't like that they are pushing me straight to IVF without giving my a couple of IUI cycles and see how I do.  So I go back on Wednesday and my IUI will probably be on Thursday or Friday of this week.

QOTW:  I have some amazing friends and neighbors who have been such a huge support for me.  I am also really proud of my craft skills!!  Here are some Easter baskets I made for my friends children. 

Frenchteachermama

HoldingOutHope said:

Thank you for the check-in, love, and I'm sending you so many (((hugs))). I'm so sorry for the news about your AMH. I'm glad that you're advocating for yourself and can switch to a better practice. Also, those Easter baskets are adorable!! AFM, yesterday was CD1 and I had a full-on breakdown. The one year anniversary of my first EDD is coming up, and Mother's Day (my least favorite day of the year) is right behind it. I stupidly had so much hope for this cycle. What a fool I am sometimes. On a positive note (I guess), we have our consult with the RE set up for end of May, and MH did give me my thermometers and OPKs back for this cycle (he was trying to help me by taking them away, but I convinced him I am crazier without them). We also have some fun concerts coming up over the next couple months, and our anniversary trip to FL in June... So I am thankful for those distractions.

I'm sending you a million squishy ((hugs)) through this post!  CD 1 is always hard.  Not only because it's impossible not to get your hopes up every cycle (at least that it the way I feel) but also because it is CD 1 so you're PMSing on top of the disappointment.  Even though I'm not in love with my RE they have shed so much light on my situation and I hope the same will happen for you.  You won't need to worry about you bbt and opks because they are doing all of the work for you!  Where in FL are you going? 

Frenchteachermama

HoldingOutHope said:

HoldingOutHope said:

Thank you for the check-in, love, and I'm sending you so many (((hugs))). I'm so sorry for the news about your AMH. I'm glad that you're advocating for yourself and can switch to a better practice. Also, those Easter baskets are adorable!! AFM, yesterday was CD1 and I had a full-on breakdown. The one year anniversary of my first EDD is coming up, and Mother's Day (my least favorite day of the year) is right behind it. I stupidly had so much hope for this cycle. What a fool I am sometimes. On a positive note (I guess), we have our consult with the RE set up for end of May, and MH did give me my thermometers and OPKs back for this cycle (he was trying to help me by taking them away, but I convinced him I am crazier without them). We also have some fun concerts coming up over the next couple months, and our anniversary trip to FL in June... So I am thankful for those distractions.

I'm sending you a million squishy ((hugs)) through this post!  CD 1 is always hard.  Not only because it's impossible not to get your hopes up every cycle (at least that it the way I feel) but also because it is CD 1 so you're PMSing on top of the disappointment.  Even though I'm not in love with my RE they have shed so much light on my situation and I hope the same will happen for you.  You won't need to worry about you bbt and opks because they are doing all of the work for you!  Where in FL are you going? 

Thanks. We are going to Jupiter, where we were married and near where his family lives. I will also stay behind for another week and drive up to Tampa to visit my family...unless it interferes with anything we're doing with the RE at that point.

Awesome!  We have family in Jupiter too (DH's cousin and aunt).  

LiaMadi1

Hi March Mommas! I'm spending my extra day of from work today (yay, Easter Break) with the windows open and enjoying the sunshine!  It is seriously like 74 degrees and gorgeous so I could not be happier with the weather.  The holiday was nice, nothing too eventful, but it was good to relax.

I met with my RE on Friday to discuss my uterine septum surgery and what would take place, the recovery, etc.  I was expecting the worst and actually heard great news about the surgery!  It will be an easy surgery with an easy recovery (probably no time off work).  They just need to "snip snip" the muscle and then my body will absorb it, making my uterus extra strong.  After one more normal cycle in May we will be able to start trying again and he said that after a surgery like this, the success rate for pregnancies "sky rocket".  It was just so nice to hear positive remarks from him.  While I don't know what the future holds, the idea of not having to wait until September like I originally thought, is wonderful!  So the surgery will go down probably the end of next week and then we will go from there.

QOTW: I'm looking forward to an extra two weeks of summer vacation from work and actually spending time with DH/friends/family this summer.  Usually we have a month before going back to school for training and such and we just won't have as much training.  I am going to continue looking for other jobs, but the thought of returning to my school isn't so glum now with the extra break and a MAJOR raise!

Frenchteachermama

LiaMadi1 said:

Hi March Mommas! I'm spending my extra day of from work today (yay, Easter Break) with the windows open and enjoying the sunshine!  It is seriously like 74 degrees and gorgeous so I could not be happier with the weather.  The holiday was nice, nothing too eventful, but it was good to relax.

I met with my RE on Friday to discuss my uterine septum surgery and what would take place, the recovery, etc.  I was expecting the worst and actually heard great news about the surgery!  It will be an easy surgery with an easy recovery (probably no time off work).  They just need to "snip snip" the muscle and then my body will absorb it, making my uterus extra strong.  After one more normal cycle in May we will be able to start trying again and he said that after a surgery like this, the success rate for pregnancies "sky rocket".  It was just so nice to hear positive remarks from him.  While I don't know what the future holds, the idea of not having to wait until September like I originally thought, is wonderful!  So the surgery will go down probably the end of next week and then we will go from there.

QOTW: I'm looking forward to an extra two weeks of summer vacation from work and actually spending time with DH/friends/family this summer.  Usually we have a month before going back to school for training and such and we just won't have as much training.  I am going to continue looking for other jobs, but the thought of returning to my school isn't so glum now with the extra break and a MAJOR raise!

What great news!!  FX that everything goes as planned and you are off the bench in May!  So jealous that you have another day off!  It's 74 degrees and sunny here too, such a treat in upstate NY!  I can't remember, are you a teacher?  That's awesome about the extra summer time off and the big raise!  You'll have plenty of time to relax while TTC   We moved from NJ right before my big jump in salary and I'm still bummed about missing out.

LiaMadi1

@frenchteachermama, thanks for taking over the check-in!  I'm incredibly sorry to hear about the news you received so insensitively!  I'm glad you are switching practices to a bigger hospital that will be more available to you.  The doctors that I see are part of a HUGE hospital and they are all over the place which makes seeing them a lot easier.  Best of luck with IUI this week...my friend is now pregnant with twins through her third IUI round and my thoughts and prayers will be with you!  Also, love the Easter baskets you made!! So thoughtful!

@HoldingOutHope, you are most definitely not a fool for hoping!!  Hope is all that we have and when we let go of that we let go of the things we do have control over.  I understand that major let down though and I will be thinking of you as your impending EDD approaches.  It is so awful when there are more than one EDDs that we have to remember.  My grief counseling center holds a Mother's Day Tea for women who have lost children through miscarriage.  I'm actually kind of a looking forward to that, except it is a week after Mother's Day, but I'm still looking forward to the support.  Lots of love to you!

Frenchteachermama

ktlovess said:

AFM - Not much is new with me. I have a lot of highs and lows, and I want with every fibre of my body to TTC again... but can't. It's excruciatingly painful to my head and heart, which is one of the reasons why I decided to just do the TTA check in. It makes me feel a little bit more at home right now - not that I don't love you ladies, but sometimes it sucks. I have a number of stupid triggers - my Aunt and Uncle insist on having their granddaughter's pics on repeat on their TV as a screen saver and my friend's upcoming wedding.... there will be LOTS of babies and pregnant ladies there, and I feel sick thinking about it, plus my husband is in the wedding party so I have no idea how I'll come with that.

I just feel a bit lost on the board TBH right now. 

QOTW - This is a really difficult question for me to answer. I have so much coming to an end in the next couple of months - my PhD, thesis defence, moving - that I am actually super scared. I have been in university since 19 and now I am 31. I don't feel ready to be part of the real world. But, this is also a super positive thing, because we are getting out life back on track, and I am making this big decision to start the clinical fellowship for the benefit of our family/future! 

((hugs)), ladies!

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way, but it is 100% understandable.  We all have our triggers.  Even though I am so completely THRILLED for all of our March ladies, it has been hard to see our group get smaller and smaller but I have grown to love you ladies so much I want you to have success.  You are very strong and brave to have made the TTA decision for your family.  I was also in school from 19-31 so I know exactly how you are feeling.  I'm not loving my current teaching job so now I'm playing with the idea of getting my doctorate in education.  When in doubt I go back to school!  

It sounds like you have so much on your plate right now.  I'm sending you positive thoughts and prayers that you get through everything!!!  I'll be thinking about you!

SamanthaLaura16

@Frenchteachermama – Thanks so much for the checkin I am so sorry to hear that your AMH is so low and that they relayed the news to you in such an insensitive way. That is so frustrating! I hate that you are having to go through this. Sending Big ((Hugs)) your way.

@holdingouthope – So sorry about CD 1 L. Thinking about you on your upcoming EDD and mother’s day, I know that I am dreading Mother’s day as well. I am so glad that you got a consult with an RE set up, I felt a lot better after mine. I really hope that it goes great and that you like the person you are seeing! Sending ((Hugs)) your way.

@LiaMadi1 – I am so happy that your surgery consult went great! Good Luck with the surgery! FX that everything goes great with the surgery and recovery.

@ktlovess – I am so sorry that you are having such a rough time. I hope that you can have a big cocktail at the wedding, I know that’s what I would do J. Sending Big ((hugs)) your way.

As for me I am on CD 10 and headed up to the city to start monitoring. I have my first ultrasound on Wednesday. We did 10mg of femera and then will be doing HCG shot and what I call a half ass IUI. Of course with my timing the lab tech is gone from my RE cycle so they cannot put the sperm all the way into my uterus just to my cervix. I am trying to remain hopeful but not get excited at the same time. I started acupuncture again last week and I am hoping that it helps get things going. I also found out the my acupuncturist has PCOS and has been struggling with IF for the last 2 years. It was so nice to sit down and talk with her about things, my first real life friend that I can relate to.

I also came out this morning on FB for national infertility week. I posted the 1 in 8 photo with a quote and a link to the resolve article for friends and family. I didn’t post anything about myself but as soon as it went up friends of mine started writing comments and made it very obvious that it was about me, but I really didn’t mind. At this point it is just nice to get it out there.

I am trying to remain positive about the next few months. DH is a fisherman and will be gone the majority of the summer starting mid may so we will be pretty much out for TTC. I am excited about my mom coming home for the summer and I am going to try to focus on getting out and about and enjoying my friends and family.
 

shandorfml2

Hi ladies! I'm cd 13, should o in the next week or so. Very much enjoying the spring weather in New England! @Frenchteachermama‌ sorry about the news....glad you are getting a new RE though. (((hugs))) @HoldingOutHope‌ big big (((hugs))) lady cd 1 sucks @LiaMadi1‌ yay for good news!!! @ktlovess‌ big hugs....so hard. I get the check in thing. We've had a lot of grads lately, and it can be soooo bittersweet. (((hugs))))

shandorfml2

I don't know why when I post from my iPad the formatting gets all messed up! Sorry! @SamanthaLaura16‌ Good luck with the Iui even if it's not what you expected. Yah never know, right? QOTW: the warm weather and sunshine.... Walking outside, ice cream cones, spending time with family, bonfires. No big plans for me but for fourth of July my fam is renting a cabin on a lake. pretty excited

LiaMadi1

@shandorfml2....it is one of my goals in life to have a fabulous time renting a cabin with friends in the summer...how much fun and great to look forward to!

Frenchteachermama

SamanthaLaura16 said:

@Frenchteachermama – Thanks so much for the checkin I am so sorry to hear that your AMH is so low and that they relayed the news to you in such an insensitive way. That is so frustrating! I hate that you are having to go through this. Sending Big ((Hugs)) your way.

@holdingouthope – So sorry about CD 1 L. Thinking about you on your upcoming EDD and mother’s day, I know that I am dreading Mother’s day as well. I am so glad that you got a consult with an RE set up, I felt a lot better after mine. I really hope that it goes great and that you like the person you are seeing! Sending ((Hugs)) your way.

@LiaMadi1 – I am so happy that your surgery consult went great! Good Luck with the surgery! FX that everything goes great with the surgery and recovery.

@ktlovess – I am so sorry that you are having such a rough time. I hope that you can have a big cocktail at the wedding, I know that’s what I would do J. Sending Big ((hugs)) your way.

As for me I am on CD 10 and headed up to the city to start monitoring. I have my first ultrasound on Wednesday. We did 10mg of femera and then will be doing HCG shot and what I call a half ass IUI. Of course with my timing the lab tech is gone from my RE cycle so they cannot put the sperm all the way into my uterus just to my cervix. I am trying to remain hopeful but not get excited at the same time. I started acupuncture again last week and I am hoping that it helps get things going. I also found out the my acupuncturist has PCOS and has been struggling with IF for the last 2 years. It was so nice to sit down and talk with her about things, my first real life friend that I can relate to.

I also came out this morning on FB for national infertility week. I posted the 1 in 8 photo with a quote and a link to the resolve article for friends and family. I didn’t post anything about myself but as soon as it went up friends of mine started writing comments and made it very obvious that it was about me, but I really didn’t mind. At this point it is just nice to get it out there.

I am trying to remain positive about the next few months. DH is a fisherman and will be gone the majority of the summer starting mid may so we will be pretty much out for TTC. I am excited about my mom coming home for the summer and I am going to try to focus on getting out and about and enjoying my friends and family.
 

So proud of you for "coming out" during IF week.  I've wanted too so badly but have been too much of a sissy.  We're only one day apart doing the same drugs and IUI cycle this month!  And my acupuncturist also suffers from PCOS so she's been a great support for me too!  FX that even though this IUI isn't exactly what you thought it would be that it's successful!!

Frenchteachermama

shandorfml2 said:

I don't know why when I post from my iPad the formatting gets all messed up! Sorry! @SamanthaLaura16‌ Good luck with the Iui even if it's not what you expected. Yah never know, right? QOTW: the warm weather and sunshine.... Walking outside, ice cream cones, spending time with family, bonfires. No big plans for me but for fourth of July my fam is renting a cabin on a lake. pretty excited

I hope all goes well over the next week!  Your ice cream cone comment just made me smile.  So jealous of the cabin on the lake!!