Potty trained except not really

MagickalNarwhal

My son is 26 mo and his best friend is almost 28 mo. His bfffs mom has been unrealistically obsessed with early potty training her daughter since she was born (she was hell-bent on having her potty trained before she could walk - her own words when her kid was like 5 mo old). She had a phase of being awesome going pee and poo in the potty when she was having nakey time around the house, so they made the jump to no diapers around 26 mo. 

We see them every day usually. They live across the street, and we swap watching the kids sometimes (they were our best friends even before kids). Their daughter does OK if she isn't wearing anything, but otherwise, she pees and poops her pants on the reg. Every time they leave the house with her they bring 2 extra pairs of pants, because she will have an "accident" just about every time. The kid won't tell anyone that she peed/pooped her pants, we will just noticed her soaked pants.

They are still very proud that their daughter is potty trained. Normally I'd just be like OK whatever, but honestly we hang out so much, and they are over here so much that it kind of grosses me out that their kids pee and poo ends up on our furniture. I've got enough of that between my toddler, 10 mo old, and 2 dogs.

I feel like the only choice is to only hang out outside of our house (it's miserable to hang out at their house because their kid is going through a major possessive phase so if my son even looks at anything that belongs to her she has a total meltdown). I don't think I can say anything to the parents because they are so vehement about her being potty trained. The mom has even said "well I far prefer doing laundry to dealing with diapers". 

WWYD? And, this is messed up right?

Pips09

I would say that that kid is not potty trained. As for the WWYD, I'd stop inviting them over. You are right- who wants to have someone else's kids pee and poop all over your furniture on the reg? If she calls you on it, you'll have to decide if it's worth risking offending her to tell her the truth.

MagickalNarwhal

I realize that it also stresses me out because she is a high strung anxious kid anyway, and I feel like the expectations they put on her are really messed up and are having a negative effect.

But yeah, logistically I will just keep us out of the house. Now that its getting nice out hopefully that will happen naturally a bit more anyway.

Codypup

This is totally passive aggressive, but you could cover your furniture with something waterproof, like a tarp or shower curtain liner. When your friend asks why, you can say you're protecting your couches from her LO's accidents.

 

I mean it's the truth, right?