Is this wrong?

Daniel's Mama

I gave DH a chore list and told him that the only way he could go out tomorrow night is if he finishes everything on the list. My mom says that this is just wrong, but i think that she tends to be too passive in her marriage so she doesn't count. 

I feel like I have 2 children, DS and DH. For example, he has had boxes of junk in the office since before DS was born and I keep asking him to go through it but he always has other VERY important things to do such as: watching tv, playing Tiger Woods, dickingaround on Ebay...

 Anyway, am I evil or is my 'chore list' warranted?

Temp856430000003146

Eh, that does seem a little controlling to me.

JARbaby

If you have to pull teeth to get DH to help then not wrong, if you act like a child then you get treated like a child by me.

If I make expectations clear DH aleays pulls through.

BetchySprout

My DH is the same way, and is also given a list of things to do. That way, I can just direct him to the list. WoW seems to win out unless he gets the stink eye though.

DarceyLivesinFL

Honestly, you sound like a huge_bitch.

Daniel's Mama

DarceyLivesinFL:

Honestly, you sound like a huge_bitch.

 

Thanks. You  are more than welcome to come to my house and pick up after my DH all day long. I mean, I guess it is pretty_bitchy of me to request that he finishes projects that he starts and pick up after himself like an adult.

chigirlinaz

I don't think it is wrong to lay out your expectations.  I have learned with DH that if I don't tell him exactly what I want, it doesn't get done.  I used to think that he would realize that the dishwasher needed to be emptied and just do it and then I would be disappointed when he didn't do it.   Finally I realized that if I just told/asked him to empty the dishwasher it would get done.

BTW the piles of crap laying around is opposite in our house.  I always have piles of junk that needs to be put away that drives DH crazy.  A few years ago, he kept threatening for months that if I didn't do somethign with the piles, he would throw them all away.  Well, I came home one day and it was all in a garbage bag!  Luckily, he didn't toss it, but just hid it in a cabinet in the garage to "teach me a lesson".  Unfortunately for him, lesson wasn't learned.  In fact, I believe the garbage full of crap is still in that cabinet.  We still laugh about it!

brauchtm

I don't necessarily agree with that, but I don't think you are a huge_bitch either.  My dh and I agree that if we want a luxury item, we have to give something up.  So one day dh calls me and tells me he wants to get a new beach chair and I said whatever you want but that is our pizza money - since I didn't mind giving up pizza either, he got the chair.  My coworkers in the elevator were appalled and still tease me about it - but you know what, we're okay with that situation and both agree not to live outside our means.  To each their own. 

S2BMrsP

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