Am I really ready?

Stewiesammy

I'm getting married in a few months and my fiance and I have started to talk about when to start trying to have a family. I know people always say, "you'll never be a 100% ready to be a parent" but I feel like I'm ready to go off the pill soon after the wedding. I started to get baby fever a few months ago, but I figured it was because so many of our couple friends announced that they were expecting. However, now, my libido is going into overdrive, I'm catching myself looking at baby things whenever I go shopping, we've been talking about names, and there are times when I was just relaxing and reading and I just start think about wanting to get pregnant. Is this normal?

ILoveBoys

The more you talk about it and look at things, the more it will feed into you thinking about it. Which IS normal. I think to know if you're ready you should look at jobs, etc.  Wanting one doesn't always equal being ready for one.

Stewiesammy

That's one thing that is bothering me, I feel like I am ready, but then what happens when I do get pregnant, I don't want to freak out thinking I'm actually not ready.

Stewiesammy

Nicb13 said:

Most likely you WILL freak out when you're pregnant and think you're not ready. I do that a couple times a week.

That's good to know! I figured with "baby fever" it would come and go and now it's just kind of hanging around.......

purple_2012

Towards the end of wedding planning I thought I was ready. But after being on our honeymoon, I realized that I wanted to wait awhile and H agreed. We will be celebrating our 2 year anniversary soon and I am so glad that we waited. We will begin TTC shortly after our anniversary.

Stewiesammy

Thank you all so much! Like I said some days I'm all for it and then other days I enjoy my freedom.

Wine&Cupcakes

Purple&7 said:

Towards the end of wedding planning I thought I was ready. But after being on our honeymoon, I realized that I wanted to wait awhile and H agreed. We will be celebrating our 2 year anniversary soon and I am so glad that we waited. We will begin TTC shortly after our anniversary.

Us too. Even though we were together for almost 6yrs before getting married, I felt very strongly about having some "us" time as husband and wife. Now as we approach our 2nd anniversary, and my 31st birthday, we figure its time to get the show on the road.

By no means am I "ready" in the full-on emotional way, I just don't think anyone is fully ready for the gravity of child ownership.

Stewiesammy

You haven't mentioned how your FI feels about this yet, so I hope you have some serious conversations with him before getting too invested in wanting a baby now. Hanging around here will not help, and neither will looking at all the tiny shoes in the stores. What helped me was having a goal- we'd try once we had a house. And honestly, up until maybe last October, I was so freaked out by the idea of having a baby, as much as I wanted one. I finally feel ready, but now we're waiting a month and a half for insurance purposes. It took a while for the freaked out feeling to go away. 

My FI is more than ready. He is almost 5 years older than me and he is actually the one that started to bring the whole baby thing up a few months ago. Honestly, I feel like he might be more ready than I am. He brings the topic up a few times a week, and he is really getting into picking out names.

Stewiesammy

briannamarie87 said:

I have to comment on how adorable this is! You will read about a lot of women whose husbands aren't ready, and what a headache this causes. On the off chance you haven't realized how lucky you are not to be in that category, make sure you tell your man how grateful you are for him.

Believe me I am so thankful that he is more than willing to talk about this topic already! I always figured it would be like pulling teeth bringing up TTC and when "would we be ready." We're actually planning a big trip to Europe now for next summer, so I really don't want to be pregnant for this trip, but then he brought up should I stop taking the pill before we go, or after. There are so many decisions on this whole topic, and I want to know that we're making the right choices in the matter. I heard from some people that I should wait a few months from stopping the pill before TTC and some others said it doesn't matter. I'm glad to see someone my age is giving me advice, everyone I've been talking to either family or friends is around my FI age or older so hearing that "a little piece you freaks out," reassures me that, that is normal.