REVISED UPDATE: Daycare WTF!?!? (Long)

lynngotts

So I pick LO up from daycare, and I see on his care sheet that he was given 3 bottles (I send him with 4 breastmilk bottles). Yet, in his bag are only 2 empty bottles. I ask the girl where the other empty is and she tells me that there are 2 full ones in the fridge. I ask how that's possible if he ate 3 and I sent him with 4. She says she thinks that my husband forgot to take one home the day before and he was fed that one. My brain didn't piece it all together until I got home and realized that there never was a bottle left there from the day before. So WTF did they feed my baby for this 3rd bottle!?!?! Someone else's breastmilk?! Formula? Or was it a mistake and he never had a 3rd one and went 7 hours without eating?! I'm totally flipping out here. They better have an explanation tomorrow morning. Am I overreacting?

UPDATE:

So I spoke to the director as soon as I got there this morning. I explained everything. She then went up to the infant room to speak to them first. What they do know is that #1 he was fed and #2 it was not someone else's breastmilk because only one other baby is breastfed and all of his volumes and bottles are accounted for. However, the woman that fed LO on that occasion was brand new, and doesn't remember everything because all of the babies were eating at the same time. But all signs point to him getting formula. There was one other girl working at the time, and the director is contacting her today. So, out of the options of what could have happened, I am glad that he was fed and that it was formula, but it still bothers me that this new person was clearly not paying attention. And she supposedly has 25 years of experience in an infant room. I wish I could stay home and take care of my own baby.

REVISED UPDATE:

I just got a call from the director.  Apparently after talking to everybody involved, it was determined that he was never given formula. His supposed 2nd bottle never happened. They said things got hectic after coming in from a walk and it got missed. So he went from 10am-almost 4pm without eating. How was he not upset? Was he not feeling well?

penelopemaria

I agree that they should have a better explanation, though depending on the number of kids there I would doubt they would remember... I would be pissed off too!

MissyC979

Are the bottles all labeled? I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that they fed him someone else's milk or formula until you talk to them. Perhaps there was one left over the other day?

clhathaway

penelopemaria said:

I agree that they should have a better explanation, though depending on the number of kids there I would doubt they would remember... I would be pissed off too!

Even with a large amount of kids they should be keeping track and having it right. They have child to caregiver ratios for a reason. I would talk to the director, this is certainly a problem. You need to know if your child is being fed and the person clearly just made something up. That's unexceptable.

lynngotts

@MissyC979‌ yeah all of his bottles are labeled on the top and sides. And we only own 6 5oz bottles, and I brought home the 4 I sent him with and the other two were still at home.

Ltpugs

MissyC979 said:

Are the bottles all labeled? I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that they fed him someone else's milk or formula until you talk to them. Perhaps there was one left over the other day?

If there was one left over from the day before then you should have three empty bottles.
I would be really pissed too. I hope you get some answers from them in the morning.

jy725

I've learned in the past two weeks of LO being at daycare that you have to label everything and give written instructions (verbal doesn't cut it). I provide 3 labeled bottles with her name on the bottle and cap in a small cooler bag that is labeled and it is put into her tray in the fridge that it is also labelled.
Ask for details about everything too! And don't leave until you are satisfied and understand.

lilypienmessimy

Oh no! I'm so sorry, I would be flipping out too! Get answers tomorrow!!

lynngotts

His bottles are also placed into a tray in the fridge that is clearly labeled with his name. It's impossible to miss!

azmama20

Weird. I'd be angry with no answers too.

lynngotts

How bad is it if he was suddenly fed formula or stranger bm?

thesportsgal

lynngotts said:

How bad is it if he was suddenly fed formula or stranger bm?

I don't think it's AS bad as not being fed at all. Yes, feeding him formula is against your wishes but probably not that bad for him outside of a stomach ache. And someone's else's breast milk is kind of weird but not bad in the grand scheme of things. But not being fed AT ALL for 7 hours is completely unacceptable.

I'm not trivializing the feeding of formula or someone else's breastmilk. But issue #1 is not being fed at all (in my opinion). I hope you get it straightened out!

KFED103

Get some clarification tomorrow from the person who was actually there at the time he was supposedly fed the third bottle before jumping to any conclusions. But yes, you absolutely deserve an explanation

azmama20

prettykitty2012 said:

How bad is it if he was suddenly fed formula or stranger bm?

If it's someone else's BM and he has a mspi, it could be bad. If it's formula and he's never had it before there's a risk of allergy. And not to mention, it's another baby's food. So if that is what happened, what did the other baby eat? I would be very upset. Even if it's the same brand of formula, maybe the other kids parents don't wash their bottles as thoroughly. You sent enough food for your kid so IMO there's no excuse.

This. Or maybe there's something in the BM or formula that will make him super gassy or constipated and just kinda upset his GI tract without being allergic. That's going to make the next couple of days hell for you.

And if they didn't feed him for 7 hours, I find it highly unlikely he didn't get hungry during that time, so what were they doing??

MrsJG3

Yup I would freak the eff out!

micino

I would be really upset at the thought of any of the three options.
I would love to know what thy tell you tomorrow. Please update us

RJBrownie84

I'm going to go ahead and say overreacting a bit. If this was a regular thing, I'd be worried, but probably the teacher just miscounted something. If the baby is ok, better to just move on.

sugarjack

Maybe they tried to feed him and he didn't want to eat so they put it back in the fridge.  That would explain three feedings but only two empty bottles.

clhathaway

RJBrownie84 said:

I'm going to go ahead and say overreacting a bit. If this was a regular thing, I'd be worried, but probably the teacher just miscounted something. If the baby is ok, better to just move on.

I don't think you've read her responses. All her bottles are accounted for. So either they didn't feed her LO for 7 hours or LO got someone else's food. If LO got someone else's, what did that baby eat? If the child wasn't fed 1. They lied and 2. Why wasn't her kid fed?

OP, you're justified in the way you feel. Overreacting would be pulling LO out of the daycare and not giving a chance for an explanation.

sugarjack

I wish Chunk would only eat three bottles of BM per 8-5 day.  He's at 22 oz by noon.

lynngotts

And thank you all for listening last night!

lynngotts

Have any of your LO's just not eaten as much one day?

azmama20

So with your two updates, I feel like that is ridiculous. I would, personally, be looking for another day care. And also monitoring LO to see if there is any explanation as to why he went so long between feeds (teething, sickness, etc.)

Caitlinh27

I would definitely be looking for a new daycare.

74dragonfly

I'd start looking for a new day care. The fact that they didn't feed him but marked that they did? Unacceptable.

littled2013

I've had the daycare forget to write stuff on the sheet but never put something that didn't ever occur. I flipped out when I thought the daycare over fed LO but it turned out they gave us a different child's sheet by accident. I agree that I would start looking for somewhere else though OP

micino

Unacceptable!!!!! Good Lord!!

Ltpugs

Oh no! That's not good! None of the scenarios were good but that's neglectful. I would consider looking for a new day care!

KFiori1

I use to work in the infant room in daycare and that is definitely not ok. Sure it's hectic in that room but forgetting to feed a kid? And saying/thinking they did? Not cool.

lynngotts

I am also questioning why he was not screaming to be fed. The only thing I can think of is that I'm pretty sure he went thru a growth spurt last weekend (eating alot, not sleeping as well, and now has some new skills), and Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday he slept ALOT. Last night and this morning he seemed back to normal. So maybe he really wasn't hungry at the time?

Regardless, that does not excuse them from writing down a feeding that never happened. It was hard enough having to send him to daycare and now I will worry even more. Up until this point I have been so happy with the daycare and he seems to really enjoy it. My coworker's daughter has been going there for 2 years with no issues at all. Ugh.

alanna7777

I would not be using the same daycare. Things never get too hectic in a daycare that a feeding should be marked but never given. And I agree with a PP who noted that it took an army to get a straight answer. A new worker shouldn't be blamed as it seems to be an issue of poor management and supervision. With child to teacher ratios and a set
Classroom structure things like that shouldn't happen. I have worked in day cares and preschools and we had the routine down pat-so if a staff person was out, the others could instruct a sub and keep to the routine without any hiccups. To me it sounds like the director isn't running a very tight ship!

lp0

mrsashleyk said:

Things got hectic so they forgot to feed a kid? And marked the kid was fed anyway? What the actual fuck.

This!

lifesaverz

megsswm said:

what did the Director have to say about the huge F-up?  I am curious what their reaction to this is.....they should be falling all over themselves to apologize and figure out what the hell went wrong to forget to feed a baby. 

I'm curious about this too.  I'm so sorry that that happened.  I can imagine just hearing that my baby wasn't fed would make me sick to my stomach, plus I agree on wondering how that could even happen without baby being upset.  The whole thing sounds weird/neglectful.  

azmama20

I feel like if they lie about how many times the kid was fed, what else are they lying about?

clhathaway

So the director thought that things getting hectic was an exceptable excuse? That doesn't sit well with me. And they, once again, pulled something out of their asses and said he got formula, when he didn't.

I would look into other facilities, they are giving you the run around with your child's well being. Not cool.

notkateanymore

lynngotts said:

Have any of your LO's just not eaten as much one day?

Yes there are days that DS doesn't eat much and then the next he eats a ton.

CaliforniaPeach

In CA the ratio for infants is 4:1, but it may be different where you live. Even if it gets "hectic" they should have sufficient staff to care for those babies and keep accurate records.