PGAL/PAL check in!

amdecker1016

If you never participated in the previous PGAL check ins feel free to jump min!


1. How old is your LO. If you still have an inside baby how far along are you?

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end?

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected?

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite?

ring_pop

1. How old is your LO. If you still have an inside baby how far along are you?

Oliver is 1 month + 1 day old

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected?

I'm just thankful he is out safe and sound. Sometimes I do still think about my angel - now that I get to see DS1 as an amazing big brother, I still have "what if" thoughts about the sibling they'll never know, if that makes sense.

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite? I enjoy Once Upon A Time. Also, Resurrection is intriguing.

angelsnight

1. How old is your LO. If you still have an inside baby how far along are you?  She's 2 weeks and 1 day

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end? n/a

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected?  It's a little of both.  I'm so afraid of SIDS it's unreal even though it's never happened to me.  I guess I sort of feel like I somehow made it through the pregnancy, so the happy police is still out to rob me of my baby some way or another.  But sometimes I feel pretty confident that she'll be ok and overall my fears are getting a little better with time.  I'm much less afraid of bedtime than I was a week ago.

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite?Lately I've been re-watching Son of Anarchy.

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PerkyErky

1. How old is your LO. If you still have an inside baby how far along are you?
He is 4 weeks 5 days.

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end?
NA

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected?
I worry a little that the other shoe is going to drop, but I try to focus on the positive and my beautiful healthy ALIVE baby. One of the hardest things for me is when people make comments about boys are easier than girls or will we try for a daughter. I have a daughter and I would give anything to have her here and all the "difficulties" that come with a girl.

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite?
Sheesh...I can barely manage to watch tv.

beachcomberbride

YAY, I'm excited for a check in of all of us!

1. How old is your LO. 2 weeks today!!! Crazy how fast time flies.

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end? 

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected? I am just glad he's outside now! There are a lot of things to worry about when they're outside too, and I find myself checking on him constantly, but once they are outside of me, I feel a lot safer since I can see them and they are all checked out for problems. 

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite? Oh gosh, so many! I am a huge fan of Netflix. Sons of Anarchy, Weeds, orange is the new black, Revenge, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Dexter. Just to name a few. 

amdecker1016

@ring_pop‌ i keep thinking that way too, especially with the trailers for "Heaven is For real". When they talk about the baby she had before. I feel like Mia should know about her other siblings.

@angelsnight‌ @TallAsh‌ @beachcomberbride‌ @PerkyErky‌
I so understand. I keep waking up every five minutes when she is in her pnp because i'm terrified that i have had it easy this far, something is bound to happen.

I shouldn't think that way. Its just hard!

angelsnight

@tallash, I know exactly how you feel about acknowledging your daughter.  When unsuspecting strangers ask how many kids you have, it's uncomfortable and awkward to bring up our angels, but at the same time we do not want to not acknowledge them.  They are our children whether they are here or not.

I play it by ear.  I haven't been asked yet since Emily arrived, but would often be asked when I was pregnant if this was my first.  If I was in an open and honest mood, I would say no, I had two previous losses, or I would just bring up Kayla.  It's not always uncomfortable...the one time at my eye doctor my honest answer sparked questions and concern from the ladies working there, and I really enjoyed talking to them, and sharing about Kayla and breaking the silence around pregnancy loss.  However there have certainly been times when I wasn't in the mood, and just said yes, this is my first.  There is no right answer, it's all in what you're comfortable with, but no matter how you answer, Anneliese will always know you love her and you'll always be her momma.

beachcomberbride

TallAsh said:

If you never participated in the previous PGAL check ins feel free to jump min! 


1. How old is your LO. If you still have an inside baby how far along are you? 
 4 weeks tomorrow! Hard to believe.

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end? 

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected?

I'm with @angelsnight…still a little nervous that the bottom is still going to fall out, but mostly my rainbow baby's birth was kind of the final piece to my healing. I feel guilty saying that, but it's true. My most recent birth was beautiful instead of heartbreaking and traumatic. I can look back at my loss experience and not feel overwhelming grief.

I am struggling with how to address how many kids we have… I have three living girls, but also our sweet Anneliese, and ALSO two 1st tri losses. I'm okay not addressing the earlier losses, but our baby that we named? I feel awful telling people we have three girls, when really we should have four. Do I just let her go except in private? It will be 2 years in June.

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite? 

Call the Midwife. If you have an outside baby.

This is my fourth son, my eldest died of a heart condition when he was 3 days old. Sometimes when people ask, I will tell them that this is my fourth, and if the conversation goes further (example: oh wow, what is it like having four boys in the house?), then I explain that my oldest son passed on. Sometimes, I don't feel comfortable talking about it, for instance, if I don't know the person at all, or it's just in a restaurant or in passing, I'll just say that I have 3 boys. 

I also have had several miscarriages, those I don't mention at all. They don't feel as painful to me as my outside baby that died, and I just don't feel right in bringing it up. There are very few people that know about my miscarriages outside of my inner circle, but most people that I know are aware that I had a son that passed after he was born. 

I'm sorry for your losses and I hope it comforts you to know that there are other women who feel and know your pain. Hugs!

lvlichelle

1. How old is your LO. 3 weeks!!

2. Inside baby mommies, hows your PGAL brain holding up now that you are nearing the end? 

3. MOOBS, how is your after loss brain holding up now that your rainbow is here? Is it worse or better than you expected? I check her breathing sometimes.. when she coughs
I get scared sometimes. 

QOTW: I need a new TV series to watch. What is your favorite? Greys Anatomy is my favorite. I also like pawn stars, cut throat kitchen, american pickers..counting cars.

avigailandcharlie

Hey speaking of this check in what is going on with @ellajune2012‌ - all ok? I've been very MIA on this board but also feel like I haven't seen you at all. Sending hugs!

amdecker1016

avigailandcharlie said:

Hey speaking of this check in what is going on with @ellajune2012‌ - all ok? I've been very MIA on this board but also feel like I haven't seen you at all. Sending hugs!

I'm not sure. Last log in was in January when she started moving but hasnt been on since.
I am genuinely worried about her. I tried internet stalking but had no luck lol.
I've asked her LB but they hadn't exchanged info. I PM hoping one day she'll log on!