Success after IF

Discovering their bodies?

That probably got your attention, huh?

So I'm not sure if it's just her age, and she's discovering her body, or if someone at the DC was saying something.  But during diaper changes, E will point to her lady bits and say "ewww, yucky."  I don't want her to think her lady bits are yucky.  They are totally normal.  But also private.

How do you address this?  Any BTDT advice?
TTC with PCOS since November 2009
IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
beta #2 11/28 = 2055
Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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Re: Discovering their bodies?

  • mdiblasi10mdiblasi10 member
    edited March 2014
    Are you sure she isn't referring to the dirty diaper as "yucky"? Or mixing up what she is pointing at? I know I sometimes say "pew ew" when G has a poopy diaper and he copies what I say and waves his hand, to get the smell away. Just a thought ;)  

    I definitely think they are at the age where they discover all their body parts. G points to them all by name. I guess it's time to include the lady bits for E so she calls it something besides "eww, yucky"?!?! 
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility

    TTC #1 
    IUI's #1 - #3 Clomid = BFN's, IUI #4 Follistim = BFP
    Grayson arrived via emergency c-section on 7/28/12!

    TTC #2 
    IUI's #1 - #4 Follistim = BFN's
    IVF #1 w/ ICSI + PGS: Lupron/Follistim/Menopur
    ER 4/13 - 19R, 13F, 4 PGS tested embryos, 1 normal
    5/14 FET: BFP. Beta #1: 123, Beta #2: 327, Beta #3: 854
    Cora arrived 1/23/15 via RCS!
  • That's an excellent point @mdiblasi10.  I am sure someone has told her before that a poopy diaper is stinky, so she might have those areas confused or combined in her head.  But you are right, we do need to decide on a consistent name for it, and start using it. 
    That seems so obvious when you say it, haha!
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • Loading the player...
  • So what does everyone call it?
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
     image
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  • kmc84kmc84 member
    We say lady bits ;) it wasn't a conscious desicion, just something we started saying.

    When I read your OP, I immediately thought she was copying what was said when she has a dirty diaper :)
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    TTC# 1 since 5/10
    Me:34 Type 1 Diabetes, Ankylosing Spondylitis, Hypothyroid DH:35 Perfect
    DX: Unexplained IF
    Many IUI's with various meds all BFFN
    IVF #1 11/11 canceled due to OHSS
    IVF #2 Feb/March 2012 ET of 2 on day 3 4/7 BFP! 5/1 u/s blighted ovum
    IVF #3 July 2012 ET of 3 on day 3 7/24 BFP!
    Healthy baby girl born at 36w4d on 3/9/13

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    TTC #2
    IVF #4 May/June 2014 ER 6/4 18R 8M 8F ET 6/9 1 blast, 2 frosties
    Beta 6/18 BFFN

    FET of 2 blasts 7/24...BFP!
    Healthy baby girl born at 36w3d on 3/17/15

    TTC#3
    IVF #5 June 2018- PGS planned, no surviving embryos
    IVF #6 August 2018- ET of 2 on day 3 - Chemical pregnancy
    IVF #7 August 2019-....?
  • Oh gosh, I don't even want to start thinking about this yet....
    Diagonsed PCOS TTC since May 2009
    First M/C December 2010 Second M/C August 2011
    Oct 2011~Second round clomid 50 mg; BFN
    Nov 2011~Third round clomid 50 mg: BFP
    Dec 11- Beta #1 91;Dec 13- Beta #2 186.2
    Dec 27- third miscarriage
    May 25th- Beta #1 369;May 27th- Beta #2 798
    Baby girl born Jan 23, 9lbs 3oz, 21 1/2" long
    May 27th-Beta #1 80; May 29th- Beta #2 304; May 31st- Beta #3 860
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  • Ugh I haven't thought about this either.
    I would think it was a dirty diaper comment as well.

    Married: 5/09 ~ TTC Since: 10/10 ~ PCOS ~ Progesterone from 10/10 - 2/11 ~ HSG on 3/18 - Clear ~ Started Metformin 1000mg & Clomid 50mg 2/11 ~ Metformin upped to 1500mg 4/6 ~ 6/7 Now going to SG and put on Clomid, Ovidrel, Gonal F, Prometrium, Estrace ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP!!!!!! March 6th our little man was born. 

    6/17/13 - Ovidrel, Follistim, Prometrium ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP! March 17th our St. Pattys day baby arrived

    10/29/17 - Started process for IVF, got pregnant & miscarried a 2nd time since summer. 2/22 started stims - Menopur, Gonal F, Cetrotide - retrieval 3/6 - , PIO, estrace 3xday - FET 4/18 = Beta 1: 616; Beta 2: 1342 = BFP 

  • I have a little boy who's 7 months and he touches himself all the time diaper changes and in the bath time. I imagine this is just the beginning for us lol

    Me 38 MH 41 - TTC since June 2010 - dx with Severe MFI. Straight to IVF with ICSI. IVF #1 - ER 06/13/12 - 9 Eggs Retrieved - 4 ICSI'd - only 2 fert. 06/15/12 - 2DT - 3 cell & 6 cell with fragmentation. Beta 06/29/12 - IVF #1 = BFN. 07/20/12 - WTF Appt -Told by our RE to quit IVF. Second Opinion from RE is good. IVF#2 - November 2012. Estradiol Pills Started 11/6. Stims start 11/16. ER 11/26 - 7 eggs retrieved - all mature. 4 fertilized with ICSI. ET 11/29 Transferred 3 embryos. Beta is 12/10. 1st Beta 81 2nd Beta 160 and 3rd beta 360!!! First U/S 12/21/12 - We saw one beautiful gest. sac. 2nd U/S is 01/04/2013 - H/B 183 02/05/13 - NT Scan - everything looks good and IT'S A BOY!  Aiden was born 08/20/2013.

    IVF #2 is in progress.  ER was 05/12/14 - 11 eggs retrieved, 8 fertilized with ICSI.  ET was 05/15/14 - we transferred 3 embryos as we did on the cycle my son was conceived.  We were able to freeze 3 embryos. Beta is scheduled for 05/26/14.  1st beta - 111.  2nd beta - 159 didn't double :( 3rd beta Friday 5/30) - not a lot of hope left. Beta # 3 is 247 - probably ectopic.  Beta # 4 is 813 - possibly vanishing multiple sydrome?  06/05/14 - 5w4days - first U/S - we see a gestational sac and yolk - still have hope!  06/17/14 - 7w1day - U/S and saw and heard the heartbeat - Finally!  06/27/14 - 8w4days - Baby and heartbeat look and sound great :)  EDD 02/01/14 and It's a boy!


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  • Ds is 2 1/2 and he loves playing with himself. But all boys this age do. Totally normal. We call it his penis and he will point to it and call it by name.
    Diagnosed MFI- low sperm count  
    DS-Born 7/27/11 After 2 years of IF we have our little man
    TTC#2 January 2013
    11 Medicated cycles gave us
    B/G Twins born 10/8/14 @ 32 weeks
  • I know boys do it. I'm more concerned about the yucky than I am about the touching. And the dirty diaper thing is possible, but she is touching her lady bits when she says it.
    I don't wan to ruin her self image or future sense of sexuality, but I also don't want to think about her future sexuality! Ack!
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • Mrs.AmyDylanMrs.AmyDylan member
    edited April 2014
    cinciem said:
    We used to call that area her "parts". I was planning on saying "private parts," but then I read something that said you should teach your child the real names of their body parts, so if God forbid anyone should try to talk to them about them or touch them they can tell you what happened.

    For example, if you say vagina and she comes home calling it lady bits then you know there's been a conversation about those parts with some one else. And if you ask her questions about her parts she can tell you what if anything has happened with them.

    It also said to teach them that no one should touch their private area unless they are trying to keep them clean and healthy (bath, diaper, doctor etc).

    I hate thinking about this stuff, but I guess it's just a necessary part of parenting.
    I've heard the same thing, @cinciem. I actually bookmarked another post ages ago that had really good into. I will see if I can find it. 

    Edit: my link is broken. One of the gals that commented was a social worker specializing in recognizing child abuse. She has really good advice, including calling the proper name for private parts. She said that predators tend to shy away from kids that call penis/vagina the proper names. 
    TTC Since 3/2010
    Me-36, Unexplained Infertility, DH-35, all clear
    Clomid 50mg 12/2011 = BFN
    Clomid 100mg 1/2012 = BFN, with Cyst
    IVF #1 Lupron/Menopur/Gonal-f/HCG Trigger
    ER 4/19/12 = 11 retrieved, 6 fertilized,
    ET 4/22/12 = 2 transfered (day 3), remaining 3 weren't good enough to freeze
    Beta 5/3 = BFP, 87 Beta #2 5/7 560.9 Beta #3 5/9 1376.5 First u/s One Baby, 125bpm!
    Second u/s, 176bmp! Kicked over to the OB by the RE at 8w. Team Green!! 
    Baby girl J arrived two weeks early! Born into water, med-free. Hooray for Team Pink!

    TTC #2 - back to the RE, treatment started 12/2014. 

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  • Ruthie04Ruthie04 member
    edited April 2014
    @Mrs.AmyDylan and @cinciem- you guys are right on. I was a social worker in foster care and went through the certification class to be a good touch/bad touch facilitator. I am 100% in favor of teaching the real names for the reasons you listed. Additionally, it can take some time for someone to recognize what is going on if a child refers to their genitals/breasts by a cutesy name. I've heard some very unusual ones! The individual hearing the disclosure should be able to understand what happened without asking questions for details that could skew an investigation. So, we say penis/scrotum or bottom. I don't think there is anything wrong with referring to those areas as private parts when discussing them as a group, as they should understand that they can only be touched or seen by the child or a doctor in an office (and only then with permission), but they need to know the real names.

    In grad school, I had a prof who studied under Masters and Johnson. We studied the impact of sexual shaming in childhood (especially in females) and saw the cases of various sexual disorders (orgasm and pain disorders mostly). It was awful. I think it's awesome that you are committed to making sure she has a healthy attitude toward her body and sexual organs.
    TTC in 2009, Dx: Unexplained IF
    Three TI cycles (BFP...miscarriage), five IUI attempts and 2.5 IVF cycles later...BFP!!
    12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
    Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!! 








  • Thanks @Ruthie04.  I had heard that before, about using the correct anatomical names (probably from you!) but it just seems so weird to talk to my daughter about vaginas.  I never use that word.  But obviously I will do whatever is best for my baby.
    So, can we call them boobies?  Or we really have to say breast?  Cause she knows her boobies!  (And mommy's boobies, haha.)
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • Ruthie04Ruthie04 member
    edited April 2014
    Haha. I think boobies is okay. There's very little doubt about what someone means when they say that word!

    Also, good touch/bad touch also discusses the "area your underwear covers" during bad touch discussions. I like that explanation because a perpetrator could touch a child in that area or ask a child to take underwear off, but not actually touch the vagina. They should understand that isn't okay too.
    TTC in 2009, Dx: Unexplained IF
    Three TI cycles (BFP...miscarriage), five IUI attempts and 2.5 IVF cycles later...BFP!!
    12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
    Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!! 








  • Just chiming in to say that we aren't dealing with this yet, but we do call DS's penis by it's real name, and will do the same thing with a girl if we are blessed with one.

    My sister's 2 year old twins run around her house after bath time yelling "vagina" which is funny and normal, but you have to be prepared for that to also happen in public, when you teach them the real names :)
    DH and I are Americans living an adventure in Kenya since 2011
    DX: PCOS (annovulatory)
    Feb 2012: IUI #1 w/ only 1M sperm and a single follie = BFP! 
    Nov 2012: Little buddy born in Kenya
    Nov 2013: Trying for a second, still w PCOS
    Dec 2013: IUI cycle canceled for non-response
    Jan 2014: Break cycle BFP!

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  • Lots of great information, ladies! Thank you for sharing your wisdom :)
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility

    TTC #1 
    IUI's #1 - #3 Clomid = BFN's, IUI #4 Follistim = BFP
    Grayson arrived via emergency c-section on 7/28/12!

    TTC #2 
    IUI's #1 - #4 Follistim = BFN's
    IVF #1 w/ ICSI + PGS: Lupron/Follistim/Menopur
    ER 4/13 - 19R, 13F, 4 PGS tested embryos, 1 normal
    5/14 FET: BFP. Beta #1: 123, Beta #2: 327, Beta #3: 854
    Cora arrived 1/23/15 via RCS!
  • We call a penis a penis and a vagina a vagina. I've read articles that say that sexual abusers don't like to hear kids use the correct names for body parts and that using the correct terminology can help protect your children.
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    Unexplained Infertility

    After two Clomid cycles, three injectable IUI cycles, two IVFs, two miscarriages, and one lap surgery, IVF #2 has brought us our little boy!

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    TTC #2
    After months of being postponed or cancelled, FET #1.3 (Natural FET) brought us twin girls!

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    Surprise! Baby #4 is due in March!
  • Ive learned some good things from this post. Thanks ladies.
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  • Ruthie04Ruthie04 member
    edited April 2014
    If anyone is interested in reading more about this topic, The National Sexual Violence Resource Center has a very comprehensive online publication for parents. Be warned- it's a BEAST. But, there is a section on how to talk to your children about sexuality. The author has some pretty strong opinions about some terms and approaches (I'm not sure I 100% agree with the hate on the term "private parts"), but it does have some good tips. It's actually child abuse awareness month, so it's perfect timing. HTH!



    TTC in 2009, Dx: Unexplained IF
    Three TI cycles (BFP...miscarriage), five IUI attempts and 2.5 IVF cycles later...BFP!!
    12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
    Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!! 








  • Awesome discussion guys! Totally changing how l address things with ds. I'm always worried about stuff like this.

    Married: 5/09 ~ TTC Since: 10/10 ~ PCOS ~ Progesterone from 10/10 - 2/11 ~ HSG on 3/18 - Clear ~ Started Metformin 1000mg & Clomid 50mg 2/11 ~ Metformin upped to 1500mg 4/6 ~ 6/7 Now going to SG and put on Clomid, Ovidrel, Gonal F, Prometrium, Estrace ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP!!!!!! March 6th our little man was born. 

    6/17/13 - Ovidrel, Follistim, Prometrium ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP! March 17th our St. Pattys day baby arrived

    10/29/17 - Started process for IVF, got pregnant & miscarried a 2nd time since summer. 2/22 started stims - Menopur, Gonal F, Cetrotide - retrieval 3/6 - , PIO, estrace 3xday - FET 4/18 = Beta 1: 616; Beta 2: 1342 = BFP 

  • Thanks everyone.  I thought this was a silly question when I posted it, but it really turned into a great conversation.  Thanks!
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
     image
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  • I learned so much from this discussion, thank you everyone for the wisdom.
    Me 37 DH 40 TTC since 1/11 DOR AMH .34 DH S/A Great BFP 12/11! MC 1/12 IUI #1 2/12 BFN. IUI #2 3/12 BFN. IUI #3 4/12 BFN IVF #1 5/12 BFP! DD 2/13/12
  • DD doesn't ever refer to her own parts but she loves to talk about brother's penis. "Brooder you have a penis, penis, penis, penis".every.single.diaper.change.


    TTC#1 for 19 months with PCOS and MFI IUI#3 + injectables = BFP!!!!  Beta#1-134(13dpiui) Beta #2-392(15dpiui) 
    #1 born December 2011
    TTC#2 - Beta #1 -51@10dpo Beta#2 -1353 @16dpo
    #2 born May 2013
    TTC # 3 June 2014 BFP 12-1-14
    #3 born August 2015 
    #4!!!!!!! due June 2017 
  • Okay, so this is my question about talking to little girls about their private parts. You don't pee out of your vagina and it's not clearly visible, so isn't that a confusing term to use for a little kid? I feel like penis is way easier to explain.
    IVF, acupuncture, meditation and a miracle. 

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     Our sweet Valentine's Day FET.

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  • That's a really good question @CarrieB.  I didn't understand any of that until I was older.  Possibly like junior high when we learned about it in school.  @Ruthie04 Any advice from the professional?
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
     image
    imageImage and video hosting by TinyPicimage
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