So I finally landed my 6 figure career 2 months ago. But I miss my 14 month old LO so bad I just want to quit. If I do, I'll prolly never have a chance at it again. It requires quite a bit of overtime which breaks my heart. My last job was part time and flexible and we didn't need a sitter. I was happy. But it was a job that doesn't have long term security and didn't pay much. We can afford the old way, but husband wants more money. I cry a lot. Does it get better cause it seems like it's getting worse..what would u do?.
Give the job a full year and then reassess your feelings.
Here is how I think of it. Yes, I miss DD while I'm at work but because I work every minute I spend with her is quality time. I can afford to pay someone to clean my house every week. She even helps with laundry. I haven't ironed in...years? Everything is sent out. We can afford to take her on special trips. We can afford any activity that she might want to do. I can afford memberships to the local zoo, gardens, AND children's museum...I don't have to stand in line for free passes at the library. We can, and do, go whenever we want.
I'm grateful for her Montessori daycare which teaches her SO much that I would never think to teach her. She is a happy, well-adjusted, confident and friendly little girl. She is learning at lightening speed and I'm sure it is because of the environment that she spends her "work hours"...because they are the experts in childhood development. I give her unconditional love like no one else can. I give her loads to attention when we are together. And I hope to continue to give her every opportunity to flourish without money every being a boundary (within reason).
In short, my working benefits both me AND my little girl.
Of course a SAHM (or parent) can provide an environment that enables their child to flourish! Every family should be so lucky to figure out what works for them, and then be able to provide that. I'm just giving you my perspective...from another mom who chooses to keep her six figure salary, even though her family could more than live on her DH's salary alone.
Yes, it gets easier. You will have hard days, but overall, it will get easier. Completely agree with PP. Also keep in mind that unless you were planning to home-school, in a very short period of time, your LO will be gone all day anyway. Wouldn't you rather be able to afford great enrichment activities and teach your child that women can be strong, independent earners? And ensure that in 30 years, LO isn't having to support you because you have less or no retirement savings?
You are going through A big transition and it is normal for that to feel stressful. The other PPs have already given you good advice - instead of thinking about what this new job has taken away from you try to focus on what it has given you in terms of opportunities for you, your family and your future. Also use that extra income to outsource where you can to free up some of your non-working hours.
Finally, even if this job is not exactly right for you, I would say stick it out at this job at least long enough to use it to get the job you ultimately want. So maybe you can find something between the PT job that did not pay much and the 6-figure job that requires tons of hours. And remember it is normal for new jobs to require more hours at first while you are getting up to speed. It may level out after a while.
SunAndRain said what I want to say, but much more eloquently.
Also, I am a very big believer in taking care of oneself and one's career. We can't get this time back, and opportunities can be few and far between - make the best of the chances you're given!!
Congratulations on having such a lucrative career. It is really hard being a working mom but the previous ladies have given great words of wisdom - you're a role model to LO, you'll still have your career once school is full time, you'll have retirement savings, can afford to provide well for your family, etc. I feel like you many days, wanting to walk away, but I know it's not realistic or best for my family. Hang in there, it will get easier and hopefully once you're not so new your workload will lighten a little.
I so could've written this same post. Well, except for the six figure thing, haha. Anyways, I had a very similar situation in that I had a PT, very flexible job and decided to leave for many of the same reasons you did. And man, it has been sooo hard! I still have hard days and weeks. Many times I have fantasized about just walking out, but I just try to focus on all the positives like PP's listed above. There are so many reasons why this job is great for me and our family right now. And it doesn't have to be forever. If I decide that in a year or so that I still don't like it, I can come up with a different plan. If I ever really decide to quit my job, I want to do it with a clear head so that I can do what is the best for my family's future, not what is good for this moment. So today I'm going to focus and make the most of this opportunity. It really has gotten easier the longer I've been here and gotten over some of the initial adapting. Good luck, mama!
Re: Already want to quit new job..
Being a working mom gets easier.
Give the job a full year and then reassess your feelings.
Here is how I think of it. Yes, I miss DD while I'm at work but because I work every minute I spend with her is quality time. I can afford to pay someone to clean my house every week. She even helps with laundry. I haven't ironed in...years? Everything is sent out. We can afford to take her on special trips. We can afford any activity that she might want to do. I can afford memberships to the local zoo, gardens, AND children's museum...I don't have to stand in line for free passes at the library. We can, and do, go whenever we want.
I'm grateful for her Montessori daycare which teaches her SO much that I would never think to teach her. She is a happy, well-adjusted, confident and friendly little girl. She is learning at lightening speed and I'm sure it is because of the environment that she spends her "work hours"...because they are the experts in childhood development. I give her unconditional love like no one else can. I give her loads to attention when we are together. And I hope to continue to give her every opportunity to flourish without money every being a boundary (within reason).
In short, my working benefits both me AND my little girl.
Of course a SAHM (or parent) can provide an environment that enables their child to flourish! Every family should be so lucky to figure out what works for them, and then be able to provide that. I'm just giving you my perspective...from another mom who chooses to keep her six figure salary, even though her family could more than live on her DH's salary alone.
Hang in there
Finally, even if this job is not exactly right for you, I would say stick it out at this job at least long enough to use it to get the job you ultimately want. So maybe you can find something between the PT job that did not pay much and the 6-figure job that requires tons of hours. And remember it is normal for new jobs to require more hours at first while you are getting up to speed. It may level out after a while.
Also, I am a very big believer in taking care of oneself and one's career. We can't get this time back, and opportunities can be few and far between - make the best of the chances you're given!!
I so could've written this same post. Well, except for the six figure thing, haha. Anyways, I had a very similar situation in that I had a PT, very flexible job and decided to leave for many of the same reasons you did. And man, it has been sooo hard! I still have hard days and weeks. Many times I have fantasized about just walking out, but I just try to focus on all the positives like PP's listed above. There are so many reasons why this job is great for me and our family right now. And it doesn't have to be forever. If I decide that in a year or so that I still don't like it, I can come up with a different plan. If I ever really decide to quit my job, I want to do it with a clear head so that I can do what is the best for my family's future, not what is good for this moment. So today I'm going to focus and make the most of this opportunity. It really has gotten easier the longer I've been here and gotten over some of the initial adapting. Good luck, mama!