Unhappy Toddler

noonescookie

DS #2 is due in 3 weeks, and I'm really slowing down physically - I get winded and sore if I'm moving around too much, and picking up my 19-month-old hurts my belly. He's been very needy at daycare all week, apparently crying, pretending to fall and looking for kisses, refusing to get off his teachers' laps... They've been really great about it, but it's making it hard for them since he's demanding so much one-on-one, and I feel really bad that he's so upset all day. He used to love to play with his friends at daycare. It would take me forever to get him out the door in the afternoon - he didn't want to leave! And DH says he doesn't complain when he gets dropped off in the morning, so it really just seems to be that he needs some extra love. I have another week of work before I go out on leave, so at least I won't have to rush out on him in the mornings after that, but does anybody have any tips or suggestions? He's not crying at home. I've already ramped up time spent doing things I can do with him - I think I know at least a dozen more books by heart - and keep offering alternatives for the things I can't do, like holding hands instead of carrying him or having him bring toys over to where I can sit instead of trying to follow him around and get up and down off the floor. In addition to my limitations, DH has had to work late the last two weeks, so I think DS is hurting for attention on all fronts. :-(

beccalee721

I'm sure this isn't an easy time for any LO but you're doing the best you can and he'll be ok in the end. I haven't gotten to this point yet because I'm only 14 weeks with #2 but I would think this is the normal reaction of a toddler. Just give him all the love you can and make sure he feels like the big brother helper once the baby arrives and I'm sure he'll be happy. It's a huge transition for them so it takes some time.

MommyAtty

I'm finding, with a 20 month old and 6 weeks to go, that the more matter-of-fact I am about things, the better DD is doing. I just say "Mommy can't pick you up, but Daddy can hold you while I cook" (this is a biggie... She's obsessed with seeing what's on the stove!). Or "you are such a big girl that you can walk to the car! I'm so proud of you! Thank you for waiting for Mommy." If I act like she's missing out on something or respond to her being upset, it seems to fuel the fire. When she gets really upset, we have a snuggle on the couch and talk about what a big girl she is and what a great big sister she will be. My biggest issue right now is getting her to let Daddy do things for her. She is just all about Mommy when I'm there. I'm worried about how she's going to react when the new baby is here and I need her to be with Daddy while I'm dealing with the newborn.